Social Enterprise

End your career with these Weiner-style social networking tips

You, too, can end your career with a spectacular flourish! Just follow these four easy steps.

Looking to end your career in a spectacular fashion? We can help. We've taken the liberty of compiling some really effective social networking guidelines for instant unemployment (and, as an added bonus, divorce!).

Tip # 1: Develop a delusional arrogance

This is a must. You have to believe that every privacy risk you take online is beyond all the danger that is unceasingly talked about on every TV and radio program from 60 Minutes to The View.

Tip # 2: Pixilating your private parts is just good courtship

If you see that person that you want to woo, what better way to do it than by tweeting a photo of your crotch? Thankfully, modern technology has paved the way for more direct, dignity-free romance. Who needs a dinner and a movie?

Tip # 3: Over-estimate the character of the recipients of your sexual tweets

Really, if you can't trust in the absolute discretion of someone who actually welcomes your sexts and repulsive photos, then who can you trust?

Tip # 4: It's not enough that you have no character, but you have to share this with the world.

I believe it was Abraham Lincoln who said, "If you want to test a man's character, give him a Twitter account." Well, something like that. The grueling days of harboring deep, dark secrets and hiding behind a façade of dignity are over. And, really, as long as John Edwards is walking around, you have a pretty high immorality threshold to work with.

About

Toni Bowers is Managing Editor of TechRepublic and is the award-winning blogger of the Career Management blog. She has edited newsletters, books, and web sites pertaining to software, IT career, and IT management issues.

40 comments
Alex
Alex

Love the humor in this post. Here are some tips from career coach, Alexandra Levit, on how to be active on social media AND maintain your employment status: http://bit.ly/moEKOY

jim
jim

He was just making sure his Constituents were kept informed in a "left handed sneaky way" and lied about it.

delf20k
delf20k

So what is the biggest problem? The fact that some of your people in high office are lairs and rakes with no moral fiber or the fact that they are fools as well? Or is it that someone of that caliber can get elected at all?

jck
jck

now you know you loved those pics I sent. OOPS! Was this a public post? :-O :^0 :p

jayohem
jayohem

THEY wonder why some people consider themselves candidates for high office, and WE wonder why those candidates get elected in the first place.

Robiisan
Robiisan

...attributed to Robin Williams about God giving men a big head and a little head, but only enough blood to run ONE AT A TIME! Weiner is apparently a prime example, but It's obvious that he's not alone in that aspect in the district of corruption.

bill.mcfarlane
bill.mcfarlane

Stupid actions are everywhere, just a lot of people get a way with it. You have Senator Vitter who was wrapped up in the DC madam, seems to like to wear diapers, and he walks around like he's the moral one in the room...

pgit
pgit

You will naturally be outraged by the reaction of your constituents when they find out about this. Don't be shy, remember YOU are the victim here! Those women should have been honored by your attention, how dare they violate your sacred trust! When you're knocked down and on the ground, start digging. Remember; WWI was fought in the trenches, and mustard gas has been outlawed, you have nothing to fear but fear itself.

premiertechnologist
premiertechnologist

Toni, you and Jason are really good at this. Keep up the good work. Now then: How many congressmen do you think may actually be doing this successfully? I mean, maybe, just maybe, your four points actually work in the real world for the majority; after all, this is the way of things in the world today: Twits tweeting on twitter. Luminaries with the attention span of a gnat come to a position of power. And which should it be? Weiner doesn't have the morals of an alley cat? Or weiner DOES have the morals of an alley cat. Whatever else you may say, he really is FIT. And looking good is the ONLY qualification for positions of power these days, whether you pursue government, business, academia or religion. Have I forgotten a category?

TonkaToys
TonkaToys

As the current British Prime Minister, David Cameron, said on live radio. (Thats Tw@ - thanks autocensor)

AnsuGisalas
AnsuGisalas

"If you're not sure if it's wise to twitter something, you definitely should! - That's just that false modesty talking, it's likely been in the way of your total world domination for years! Go for it, the world will understand." :D

AnsuGisalas
AnsuGisalas

there's a modernized version of "Sense and Sensibility" circulating Hollywood, looking for the right person to filmatize it in full frontal 3D. Due to technological advances (namely twitter) the entire plot has been cooked down to all of two pages. One of those a cover letter.

Media Asset Management
Media Asset Management

This ties in with his 'delusional arrogance' but it was pure stupidity on his part to be a public figure and send out text/emails in the clear like that. If he had used an email encryption service, the content would have been only seen by his intended recipients, coudn't be forwarded, and the messages would automatically self destruct after a period of time. There are free encrytion services that are very quick and easy to use. He was arrogant and careless. I use this free service to send and receive encrypted emails at https://www.sendinc.com/

CharlieSpencer
CharlieSpencer

You would think he would have learned by now to avoid ANYTHING that would give his tormentors any additional ammunition. Of course, it could be worse; you could be MRS. Weiner.

Scott Lowe
Scott Lowe

And I believe that your Abraham Lincoln quote was accurate :-)

CharlieSpencer
CharlieSpencer

how about not getting Toni's address mixed up with mine?

Robiisan
Robiisan

...it had a cover letter - about the equivalent of what Mr. W was allegedly wearing in his email, I'd say. :-)

AnsuGisalas
AnsuGisalas

After marriage: Mr. and Mrs. Little-Weiner

JamesRL
JamesRL

It was an interesting mix. On the one hand Jon has had Mr. Weiner on as a guest on a number of occasions, and considers Mr. Weiner a friend. We get the impression that they have socialized outside of work. They are both Jewish Liberal New Yorkers (not that there is anything wrong with that), so they have a lot in common, run in the same circles etc. On the other hand as a comedian, satirist and commentator, Jon couldn't help himself. He literally couldn't keep a straight face. It was the "What was he thinking?" aspect that made Jon cringe and laugh at the same time.

info
info

Twitter wasn't around in Abe's day. I don't know how you couldn't pick up on that. He had to make do with CompuServe... ;)

Sterling chip Camden
Sterling chip Camden

Yeah, it's the sheer stupidity of Weiner's weiner-tweet, rather than any moral take on the issue, that makes me question whether he's qualified to make the laws of our country -- as low as that bar seems to be.

AnsuGisalas
AnsuGisalas

a freudian slip-up if there ever was one ;)

JohnMcGrew
JohnMcGrew

So it's not much of a surprise that Jon was a bit soft on him, beyond the fact that they are fellow travelers ideologically.

JohnMcGrew
JohnMcGrew

So it's not much of a surprise that Stewart has gone a bit soft with Mr. W.

info
info

I didn't look into thie 'Weiner' thing, so I don't know the details. But it gets me how people go nuts when people in positions of power and prestige do something to show that they're ordinary people, just like the rest of us. They have the same thoughts, prejudices, and senses of humour...

inouyde
inouyde

Give me moment to think of an immature joke about "soft" and "Weiner"... hang on...

JamesRL
JamesRL

I would doubt they will be going for coffee anytime soon. One thing I like about Jon Stewart is that he isn't focussing just on Republicans, he mocks the Democrats too.

AnsuGisalas
AnsuGisalas

That damn Edison always said he had "a spare kite up and it's got your name on it."

AnsuGisalas
AnsuGisalas

Let's lower the gain: "I don't expect them not to be subhuman, just to have good chaperones to stop them from exposing themselves on twitter." Continuing from; An "honest" politician is one that stays bought. ... A "smart" politician is one with stay-up britches.

NickNielsen
NickNielsen

in today's political climate? If there's been any good judgment demonstrated in Congress over the past few years, I've not seen it.

femmesport4
femmesport4

How about poor judgement? Shouldn't those who write the laws for the rest of to follow have GOOD judgement? I don't expect them to be super human just have the good sense not expose themselves on twitter.

spin498
spin498

Like the rest of us? Don't speak for me pal. This ain't ordinary, it's unmitigated arrogance and gall.

lawrence.coldicott
lawrence.coldicott

@info@... You lost your audience at "i didn't look into..." Always know what you are opening your mouth about!

ultimitloozer
ultimitloozer

that those who end up getting elected to public office are complete morons. They are NOT ordinary people. They constantly show a severe lack of good judgement, next to no sense of ethics, extremely low morals, and non-existent common sense. But these appear to be requirements to be a lawmaker in the US.

CharlieSpencer
CharlieSpencer

the same failure to understand the software they're using, the same expectation that they can pull the wool over everyone's eyes.