IT Employment

Is your boss an idiot?

Here's a tongue-in-cheek quiz on how to determine if you, or your boss, is an idiot.

In "honor" of National Boss Day (October 16), I got an email from a PR person touting a new book by Dr. John Hoover, called How to work for an idiot: Survive and thrive without killing your boss. I think the sender might be a little confused on the purpose of National Boss Day, but what the heck?

The email included a quiz that is kind of fun. You can take the quiz yourself as a boss or answer the questions for your boss. Here's the quiz:

1. When something goes wrong at the office, I:

a. Automatically blame it on someone else.

b. Drop important work and focus on damage control.

c. Send out for pizza.

d. All of the above.

2. When I receive orders to cut my staff, I:

a. Check the batting averages of everyone on the department softball team.

b. Cut the people who challenge me the most to think and innovate.

c. Send out for pizza.

d. All of the above.

3. When I receive orders to increase production, I:

a. Threaten to fire the people who challenge me to think and innovate.

b. Start a list of employees to blame for low production.

c. Send out for pizza.

d. All of the above.

4. When I receive orders to cut costs, I:

a. Cancel the holiday party.

b. Force employees to provide their own office supplies.

c. Force employees to pay for their own pizza.

d. All of the above.

5. When I'm ordered to reward employees for good performance, I:

a. Check the batting averages of everyone on the department softball team.

b. Allow employees to order extra office supplies.

c. Order extra pizza.

d. All of the above.

Each (a) answer is worth one point, each (b) answer is worth two points, each (c) answer is worth three points, and each (d) answer is worth four points.

Four points: Just Plain Stupid

Five to 12 points: A Real Idiot

13 to 19 points: A Complete Idiot

20 points: A Colossal Moron.

About

Toni Bowers is Managing Editor of TechRepublic and is the award-winning blogger of the Career Management blog. She has edited newsletters, books, and web sites pertaining to software, IT career, and IT management issues.

91 comments
Host.co.in
Host.co.in

After having a working experience of 7 year, I found that the most annoying and evil people on the earth are bosses, managers and team leaders. They won't let you change the definition as they know you will be a superior leader compared to them. Making decision around a table is the dumbest activity.

je.martinez2
je.martinez2

My boss is the worst employee in the IT deparment however he was given a raise!. I remember there is a article which talks above why worst employees get a raise, can you help to find it?

kjohnson
kjohnson

"My manager couldn't organise an explosion in a dynamite factory."

ess
ess

When is the pizza going to be delivered.?? If this is a hoax, I quit.!!

reisen55
reisen55

Our IT department at Aon suffered under a real brain dead moron who actually went crazy, vanished for two months - nobody knew where he was - until he came in at 4:30 am, cleaned out of his office, formatted his computer (all of our reviews went bye) and never came back. We learned he was fired about a week later and the sub-manager, a great guy, was astonished!!!!

Creeping Critter
Creeping Critter

He didnt know anything..or didnt know much. But he always gave me a raise every year sometimes twice a year! Now that he's gone to another state the current bosses are just idjits.

premiertechnologist
premiertechnologist

You can decide for yourself; these are the very last words of the IT Director to me as she RIFfed me: "I don't know what I'm doing."

kjohnson
kjohnson

(a) Make employees travel in Rubbish Class (b) Cancel salary rises (c) Cancel annual bonuses (d) Cancel the senior managers' junkets in Honolulu HINT: The answer is not 'd'

alan.schuh
alan.schuh

All bosses are, by definition, idiots. My present boss is the biggest idiot I've ever...oh..wait. I'm self employed.

robertcevans23
robertcevans23

You mean I have to put down my Pizza to answer? 8^0

GovRon
GovRon

Employee had a teenage daughter that was dying of cancer. The boss joked that his family was responsible for the firm's health insurance rates going up. This was in a meeting, about 9 people present. Everyone just sat there shocked, I was the only one who actually said to him that the joke was grossly inappropriate.

MargieC
MargieC

In the last 1/2 hour, while I'm starving to death, my boss has given me three actual, real-life examples as proof positive that he/she positively is an idiot. 1. Came in to say "I don't know what's going on and if I DID know what's going on, I probably couldn't tell you. But, stay inside and keep busy." All the while frantically and eyes wide and obviously nervous/fearful. Then he came back to say "No one is in danger." Though curiously, he looked a lot like the robot on Lost in Space. "Danger, Will Robinson. Danger" (Note: Found out just now that there was a very minor police issue involving an officer coming to ask another employee a question. He was not arrested. There was no scene. >>> Just a question. ) 2. Came in to apologize for not responding to my request to attend a workshop and was very sorry I missed it yesterday......... Um the workshop is in November. I sent an email requesting to attend it yesterday. When I mentioned this to him. He waved his hands again and said "Gosh, my mind is just going berserk." Went back to his office. Emailed me permission to go to the workshop and told me to put it on the calendar. I put EVERYTHING on the calendar. It's my job. I put his appointments on the calendar, my appointments, the entire 130 employee's training commitments on the calendar. I think I would know to put it on the dang calendar. 3. He sent me an email with a Dilbert comic that wasn't funny and asked "Scared yet?" Um...... I wasn't with examples #1 and 2 but now I am starting to worry.

Creeping Critter
Creeping Critter

... i guess it wasnt serious. However its always serious when it comes to idiot or sub-par employees.

MargieC
MargieC

and my boss won't take it unless I take it first so he can copy my answers

tom.price
tom.price

Refused to answer any of the questions, told my staff that I would write up anyone wasting any more time on crap like this. My score 0!!

JonathanPDX
JonathanPDX

Among the other things, the numbering of the quiz was interesting as well...using letters for the questions and numbers for the answers, which would have eliminated the entire need for conversion. My favorite form of lunacy is corporate-based. The who company is doing poorly according to the powers-that-be, so they fire 10,000 workers a couple of months before the Holidays. Then, for some strange reason, the books suddenly appear to show that though the corporation has made a profit, and the executives get obscenely huge bonuses, while those who were let go get the shaft. It's really a wonder that none of these corporate whiz-bangs hasn't been lynched yet.

jimrhenow
jimrhenow

I used be on the road a lot. I sometimes did jobs for customers that took a half- day. He would give me a job to do at 7:00 am which was 200 miles away. I would leave home at 3:30 am, go to the customer, do the job, finish at noon, thinking I would get home for supper. I would call the Boss to let him know that I finished. He then would give me a job to do 300 miles away from where I was... for that afternoon... at 1:00! I would explain the situation to him and he would figure it out, but this happened nearly EVERY DAY. This was all done from a van, no planes or trains! Sometimes he would send me to northern VT on Monday, southern CT on Tuesday, northern NH on Wednesday, south eastern MA on Thursday, and Maine on Friday. I suggested that I could go north for 3 days and stay overnights, then do the southern route on 2 days. He screamed at me on the phone for trying to do his job. The next conference call with the group, he praised someone else for my idea. One week I worked 3 twenty one hour days in a row, with a massive head cold/sinus infection. I couldn't take any medication because I was driving a lot. He called to give me the itinerary for the next 21 hour day and I told him I was sick and needed to go home and rest...he threatened to fire me. I found out later that the managers were instructed to harass the older (over 55) workers to get them to quit so they could hire younger people for a lot less money. I would not give in. He was my manager for 8 months but it felt like 20 years. I retired shortly after at age 60 with a nice severance package! There was a massive shakeup last year and almost all of the managers were fired. This guy was one of the few they kept...with a nice promotion. The question is, "Is he incredibly stupid?" I don't think so, he just has no soul or ethics. I should write a book, there are a hundred other things he did. I took a part time job and my current boss is great. Don't tell him, but I would probably work there for free.

Englebert
Englebert

Pizza and Beer....now you're talking !

Slayer_
Slayer_

He used to get us pizza all the time, our new boss is just an idiot :( .

RandyLyon
RandyLyon

A was listening to a new CEO telling the masses how he is a success because he always hires people smarter than himself. A wag in the back, shouts "we all do that; but doesn't that make you the dumbest person in the company?

rocket ride
rocket ride

I didn't even know there was such a thing. Anyway, my boss scored a zero on the test, but I already knew he was the antithesis of idiot, so that came as no surprise.

xangpow
xangpow

If you seriously took offence to this you might want to take another look at you management style. It is quite obvious that no bosses use "send out for pizza" as a solution for everything in their company, good or bad.

leo8888
leo8888

If you don't get the joke just close your browser, go back to your miserable life, probably making other people around you miserable as well, and walk away! Perfect example, the new Ben and Jerry's ice cream, Schweddy Balls. I read an article the other day about a conservative group called "one million moms" who are upset over the name and telling everyone to boycott Ben and Jerry's. Big surprise, another conservative group upset over something so trivial and forgetting that it was supposed to be a joke. Their are so many other serious problems to deal with as a parent and they focus on something like that. Oh well, that's my morning rant, think it's time for another cup of coffee. :-)

CarlosBenjamin
CarlosBenjamin

This is a bunch crap and a waste of time. But, I guess you get paid for doing this and the real intent was just for provoking a response and/or participation. Well, congratulations - You have succeeded...Good Work!! CB - Aruba.

Ole88
Ole88

it just means you can't add - ROFL

NickNielsen
NickNielsen

Overheard on the site for a new cell tower: "He couldn't manage an erection with outside help..." :0

kjohnson
kjohnson

"Half the money I spent was wasted, and I don't know which half it was."

NickNielsen
NickNielsen

...waited until they got home to give you a score of 20?

kjohnson
kjohnson

...they'll go on doing it.

sissy sue
sissy sue

There are too many people who don't have a sense of humor anymore. And WAY too many people take themselves too seriously. Do you think that anyone could make a movie like "Airplane" in today's super-sensitive, thin-skinned, politically-correct climate?

AnsuGisalas
AnsuGisalas

to get their hands off my schweddy balls! :p

Big B
Big B

This just was a dumb article and not even funny. Didn't take any offense to it. It was just not funny.

wdvs88
wdvs88

You must be the new boss. Welcome to your new office. We have proactively programmed all of the local pizza shops into your speed dial. Here is a list of the employees in your department, with their batting averages and fielding percentages. We look forward to our imminent and inevitable downsizing. Sorry, "tongue in cheek" must mean something different in Aruba.

utford
utford

And yet - you took the time to read it AND respond to it - seems you have time to waste.

Andrzej_Ladosz
Andrzej_Ladosz

... it means s(he) is very thorough - going through this test multiple times "to make sure..". And definitely can count without using own fingers (and toes!). Good boy...err... good boss! (repeated pat on the back).

kjohnson
kjohnson

Do you think they care whether it's legal or not? If anyone cared whether it was legal or not, Trading Standards and the Employment Courts would be out of a job.

mudpuppy1
mudpuppy1

Since we live in an Idiocracy.

n_egii
n_egii

Order some pizza and relax. You will get the humor while eating a pizza. Did I just sound like a boss?

Arcturus909
Arcturus909

Most bosses don't say, "order some pizza" but even of the few that do, they never say, "relax"! Will you come be my boss? Bring beer!