Dude, you don't even RUN Apache
I run Apache with Oracle's Applications Express. There is NOTHING static about that content - the web pages are entirely dynamically drawn with data taken straight from my database.
Apache also comes out-of-the-box now with PHP and Perl extensions ready to go. You can enable Python or Cold Fusion as well with a few steps. These are dynamic scripting languages every bit as powerful as ASP.
You are drawing a VERY poor characterization based on something you know little about in defense of a particular platform. In the future, I would suggest doing a little more homework and playing less with fire. You might get torched. Again.
