Although my profession isn't really tech-based, we rely quite heavily on our network and workstations. And, of course, I am the lone IT guy here. A few of my fellow employees swear up and down that they are having a problem with their computer, but that it ALWAYS works when I'm standing there.

I tell them that most people don't really understand computers because they try to be nice to them. You must strike some fear into the computer. The reason all the computers work for me, I tell them, is because they know I can turn them all into toasters.

Once we're done laughing, I explain the reality of the situation, and that there is such a thing as a "random glitch" or connectivity problem.