Spare the Rod
Interestingly, the "Respect and be gentle" was an explanation I once heard for Proverbs "spare the rod and spoil the child": The rod is what a shepherd uses to direct the sheep---not beat them as most people think that verse means. Thus the emphasis is on disciplining (disciplina is the Latin word for teaching and learning), not punishing---which whether you use punishment or are against it you end up with a result that the person learns nothing, finds no boundaries, etc. But the "bust their ass" guys are a common fixture in America, oddly.
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