Discussion on:

The 10 most dangerous species of IT manager

I can think of living examples of each of these species. Very funny Dray-meister!

This article bears a striking resemblence to one on Brainbox...

http://www.brainbox.com.au/brainbox/home.nsf/$all/D083B5F03F5EFE4049256EBB003C2528

Tsk, tsk!

If your "tsk tsk" is to imply even remotely that Dray might have copied the other author, think again, Big Pig. Pay close attention and you'll see that Dray's article posted 13 Aug and the brainbox piece posted 17 Aug. Dray's article is FAR superior and OBVIOUSLY very, very different. Perhaps the Brainbox author is the one who should be tsk'd.

Okay the brainbox piece ORIGINALLY ran in June 04. Still Dray wrote his "species of Help Desk Callers" long, long before that, and updating it for managers is perfectly logical followup. Keep on truckin' J-Dray!

Actually, I think the original one appeared on contractor uk in 2001...

http://www.contractoruk.com/news/00410.html

To set the record straight, I had never heard of, or visited Brainbox before tonight, my brief visit there showed a scrappy article that bears no relation to the spoofing of taxonomic classification that I occaisionally churn out. Have you read my stuff about mud?

I am reminded of the Meyers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) and a thing called enneagrams. Of the two, the MBTI seems a lot more firmly grounded. The extremely impatient, almost flighty manager that wants to be involved -- for a few minutes -- and can leap to any conclusion in a single bound is often the MBTI type "ESFJ". The breakdown in information technology is that you need a thinker (T in third column), but thinkers are not as fast to climb the corporate ladder. Feelers (F) can spot opportunities and exploit them much faster, react emotionally to situations. When I see a serious server or router problem, I think, "Cool!" fire up the sniffing tools and get to work. Others (F type) panic and go to "general quarters" (or "battle stations") with no clear plan on what to do about it.

OMG, Out off the articles on the net wouldn't you figure there would be a couple similar to one another, it doesn't mean he is swiping anything sheesh!

Just because the idea of making fun of managerial types is a possibility would not mean the author copied it. I thought it was quite original and hilarious. For those without creativity, maybe they should take a break...

I thought it was a great article so who cares WHEN it was originally posted. Everyone should find it amusing and informative. Seems to me that someone has nothing better to do.

But this one is new and improved.

How about P. Procrastinatus-Crisum, the manager that p5rocrastinates every decision and every action until there is a crisis and then makes a decision because "in a crisis any decision is the right decision."

Employees never know what to do or how to act, can't make decisions, and generally wait for the fire-bell to ring.

Not extinct by anymeans, though rarely seen in some areas he is a frequenter of the bureacratic habitat closely related to P.Politicus.

try that -

Procurator Vesuvius possesses all the characteristics of nitroglycerine ? stable in an isolated environment, yet highly volatile and explosive in any situation involving change, movement or contact with another potentially dangerous agent. Mr or Mrs Vesuvius is highly likely to comprehensively lack any ability to grasp the impact that their volatility invariably has on their staff. On complaint from workers that he or she is difficult to approach and hard to talk to, Vesuvius will often react with the same explosive anger that causes the problem in the first place (?You think this is angry!? You haven?t even SEEN me get angry!?), further cultivating a fear of confrontation or conflict. As a result of the inevitable departure of the staff who are assertive and able to hold their ground, a Vesuvius placed in a position of power (and being permitted to control by using fear) within an organisation ultimately results in its ranks being populated by timid, frightened staff who can?t stand up for themselves.

This is both hilarious and sad. It is frightening to think there are still people out there like this, especially after I faced a layoff in 2002 from a very lucrative management job.

Could it be that somebody at the top thought of me as one of these? Ahhhg! It makes my skin crawl to think so.

Well done article. A very funny way to engage in some self reflection. Never assume that you could not be one of these managers. Remember, to assume makes.... (Ee-gads! It's happening again! ).

Also known as: Praise Stealer or the Blame Dealer

This species is uniquely embodied with the skill of : Post Project Responsibility Projection (PPRP). PPRP is a skill extraordinarily effective on senior level management personal.

P. CreditusUsurpus (CU) has never managed a bad project, has never failed, and never will (despite lacking any IT knowledge or even basic management skills). Every positive IT accomplishment was due to his personal sacrifice and hard work (it?s his lie; and he tells it his way). His utter lack of IT knowledge and management skills is easy to conceal when PPRP is evoked. He manages a staff but you would never know it because all projects are HIS and his alone.

His unfortunate subordinates are never invited to meeting with other senior staff. This action alone dooms them to eventual termination at the hands of CreditusUsurpus. Without technical skills CU routinely accepts timelines that are impossible to achieve. CU agrees to everything (often with enthusiasm), making him a friend of senior management, thus the myth of singular perfection is maintained. Any project that senior management views as ?good? was always the sole initiative of CU, any IT failure was do to the ?egregious error? of one of his minions. CU?s staff must perform daily miracles to stay gainfully employed. Staff is inevitably purged after any failure that might (somehow) be associated to CU. As CU tells it? A member of is staff occasionally becomes awe struck with CU?s grasp of IT and ?bites off more then they can chew? in a vain attempt to emulate the CU.

In its worst form P. CreditusUsurpus also posses a subset of traits belonging to Procurator Teflonius, whereby any failures are unable to affix themselves to him. CU also finds it particularly difficult to transfer project failures to his underlings, so they are never present to defend themselves. It is critical to CU?s success that successful projects belong exclusively to him, and failures are always due to his staff?s failure to follow his carefully crafted project plan (for example global migration to AD in one week).

Of the bad managers I've seen, this is the one I've seen most often. I've had one absent manager, one vesuvius and 2 of the particularly virulent "divide and conquer" types. With all the jobs I've had over 30 years of job hopping, I'm a walking management style survey. I've also had alot of good managers...probably half of the managers have been good. Sometimes you might consider the absent ones to be the best!

As an IT manager, I can safely say I have known managers across the specialty spectrum that fit some of these charaterizations. Very funny and creative!

This article bears a striking resemblence to one on Brainbox...

http://www.brainbox.com.au/brainbox/home.nsf/$all/D083B5F03F5EFE4049256EBB003C2528

If you mean that they are both written in English, both poking at management, both freely using well-worn analogies and both grabbing at the hems of known, well documented, and often publicized psychology profiles -- then yes they are similar.

However, there are profound differences. This one is actually funny. Brainbox is just plain snide and rude. Brainbox also has a different list of managers -- I believe they share 2 "manager types" in common.

I think Jeff did a great job of putting some humor into an otherwise dry topic.

Looks like a pretty obvious rip-off to me. The intro is the same, the format the same and the concept the same. I think you must either be a friend of the author or blind. I've seen the other one before. It's been floating around for a while on various sites. I think I had it mailed to me once too.

You also need a sense of humour transplant if you think this one is funnier. Only someone without one could say that something isn't funny because it's rude! Take away rudeness and half the world's jokes wouldn't exist!

You must have gotten up on the wrong side of the bed.

I'm not a friend of the author -- don't even know him. I like his style of humor. I find it refreshing.

As for the plagerism -- this type of analogy has existed from at least the 70's and I assume that it goes back even further than that. Just because 2 authors have similar ideas that run along the lines of someone elses from 30 years ago does not mean that there was any intentional misconduct.

And the Braindump site article is BORING.

While I can generally agree that the managers you describe do not belong, I found some of the traits, without your exxageration, to be desirable. Loyalty and hard work are still occasionally recognized. Of course, you need to be working for some of the few companies that care about their employees. It may be asking too much to skip mom's funeral to work on a problem, but it is not asking too much to skip one trip to the gym to work on a problem you probably created.

As the only IT member of staff in my company, I think my manager ( namely me ) is bloody great! He takes a great interest in my personal well-being, gives me all the time off I want, and gets all the latest toys for the office!!! I couldn;t ask for a better manager than myself!!!

If nothing the staff meetings in the pub are always a joy

Hear Hear!

Same goes here, except the company owner wont let me get the goodies for the office. Sometime I can be a real PITA tho, bad part is I cant get away from myself.

I used to have that same experience. Most pleasurable indeed! Now I actually have to tell other people what to do, so we all play together. Synergistic playing has something to be said for it!

Excellent job, Dray.

I'm glad you listed P. Buzzwordia. These abusers of the English language are one of my favourite managers-to-hate. I once worked for a manager who's favourite phrase was "Assume makes an ass of u and me". I always wanted to explain to him it only does so if you don't know the difference between assume and presume ... but being he was a VP... As for Covey and his definition of Proactive ... I really wish someone would explain to him that pro- has a meaning (in support of) and that it can't change meanings to Preactive just because he says so ... (I love Alice ...)

I am somewhat disappointed that you missed my favourite ... P. Fadus. This joyous individual appeared sometime in the early 1990s and has, unfortunately, survived. His/her primary characteristic is the desire to follow the latest management fad. For example, in the '90s it was dot-com, downsizing and self-directed teams. Now its outsourcing and offshoring. Reason and logic are irrelevant to this individual ... only the latest thoughts of the latest management guru matter.

Brilliant article.

Glen Ford
Can Da Software
IS Project Management
Business Systems & Process Improvement

I was in a meeting about may 94 and the Canadian president stood up and said the company would be "right sizing" (dumb sizing). When asked how the work would get done he replied that they didn't know, but it would work out.

Interesting tha the company (NCR) was bought by AT&T in 91 as a 7 Billion dollar company. 13 years later it is a 6 billion dollar company.......... This is progress?????

Nice article... I guess I am lucky... I don't think I fit in any category, I hope there is not an other undesired category forgotten by this article, that resemble my type of management. I enjoyed that article, I have come accross some of the types in my career.

Very funny an sad article

MagicTom

Known by his superiors as a "Hands-on" manager, known by his subordinates as a PITA. A strong believer in the worst in human nature, primarily because it's what he would do in that situation. Insists that subordinates justify and pre-approve every action they take, no matter how simple (turning on a PC) or personal (potty break). After all, if you don't keep an eye on your people, they'll walk all over you!

Awesome list. I added one - procurator yourbadmygoodus, known for taking credit for others' work, spreading blame to others but not sacking them unless they take family leave (since they're not available to cover the manager's gaffs) - instead this species counsels the employee or sends the employee to a class or to the EAP (employee assistance program, outside counseling) and denies raises and promotions on the basis the employee needed counseling. If the employee actually dies, they become Deadman Walkingus unless they can find a sucker replacement ASAP.

Well done, very well done!!! Its a classic!
Regards
Craig

Not disputing the content, but be wary of the sexism - I could not help but notice the (probably unintentional) switching between "he" and "she" in the classification descriptions.

Throughout my I.T. career I have seen that Procurator Teflonius is usually in bed with Procurator Buzzwordia. Between them they couldn't perform a real I.T. function but are always successful in destroying I.T.'s relationship with Business. Having worked for a Fortune 10 company that promotes only Procurator Politicus, (Agrees automatically with whomever the current ruling party is. Ruling party using run by Procurator Teflonius with Procurator Buzzwordia.) based upon political connections, I have seen more Procurator Sheep (automatically does what they are told by Procurator Politicus) in Management.

have always worked for managers and never actually been one.

did not want to be part of the useless 1/3 of the population, as described in the Hitchiker Guide to the Galaxy trilogy by Douglas Adams.

I work for a rare and probably extremely dangerous Procurator Martyrus/IlligitimusMaximus/Insignia/Buzzwordia/Impatiens. I do hope the hybrids aren't more disease-resistant than the pure-breds.

Hated by 1/3 of the people, loved by another 1/3, and ingnored by the remaining 1/3.

Underpaidus Managers have the myriad of complex, ballanced, and interelated skills necessary to BUILD AND LEAD and manage a team of technical experts (and sociopaths?)

It is difficult to get an exclusive fix on this type of person, because they are dominant in several areas (not just one) and they have a horribly long list of skills and experiences that they bring to the table. It is difficult to compare them to other managers, because it is apples and oranges.

They can often speed-read, they will instantly delete an e-mail that has no relevance to them, if they see an attachment with a joke or video, they will probably delete it -- unless it is from a person that they are currently monitoring, in which case they will read it, and use the subject matter in a relevant way in an upcoming meeting.

This type of manager focuses primarily on accuracy, timing, and organisation of operational information. Most of their interactions with other will be leading to that goal.

This manager stays late on occassion, and leaves early on occasion. This manager does not have a mental and physical disconnect between the goings on at work, and the goings on in the rest of the world. Therefore they are sensitive and aware of family issues, political issues, inter-sex issues, inter-racial issues, legal issues, and when faced with complicated situations at the office, they handle them with the skill of Jimmy Carter.

If you are the kind of person who likes to focus on doing a good job in your own area, you will love this manager. This manager is not scared of having to aprove a raise for a good staffer, and also not scared of a demotion or firing of problem staffer. If you are lazy and manipulative you will hate this manager, because they won't fall for your garbage, or cover you out of any guilt for their own shortcomings.

This manager may micro manage part of a project or department, yet totally leave non-disfunctional units entirely alone. They will NOT fall for the attempted hiding of key business information, yet they may completely ignore information that could be used to generate more power and control for themselves in the organisation -- if it makes no business sense to pursue it.

In other words, Procurator Underpaidus is the person that takes over the entrepeneurial spirit from the era when the company was smaller, and excercises this type of thing in their own group. Their contributions are usually beyond affordable calculation, and generally missed or ignored by those they report to.

Other managers, lateral and above, usually being of one of the breed discribed in the original article, take numberous step both conscious and sub-conscious to distance themselves from Underpaidus, for fear that the next to this person, they look really ordinary or worse.

Procurator Underpaidus, usually wants to work strictly on a financial metric, and is often denied this by corporate policy and "fairness" excuses. Conversely, this manager treats his own employees as individual, and is willing to construct any kind of schedule or financial arrangement that brings value to the team.

Having this type of manager is extremely disconcerting to those who make their way through their career by subtrifuge, dishonesty, and back-stabbing. Thus, this manager will be consistently attacked by that group. (It is a fool senior management that buys it)

This manager understands and reacts to the customer using a very consistent and simple application of free enterprise. The customer is always right to ask for a service or product, and the job of the supplier, is to respond quickly with a price. There is no legal or logical requirement to cheat one's own company or staff on behalf of a client, yet most weak kneed managers do just that on a daily basis, then blame their own management for putting them in that position. Less talk more spreadsheet!

We are out here! We are taking a lot of crap on. And we are making companies work DESPITE their bad policies and hiring practices. Those other managers (much like government officials) are really a big expensive parasitic tax on the workings of the business landscape, and waste a lot of resources on a daily basis world-wide. So while this is funny, its not really funny.

I've seen the tears, stress, health problems, and so on that happen with IT people that really exist only because of bad management. Smart people must be lead by even smarter people. Anything less and they will work the system on their own, essentially manage themselves, and that is the corrosion of the entire system we see around us. Management both formal AND informal is being attempted by people without the qualifications, and they are being hired and promoted and ignored into those positions of power, by other unqualified-for-management people.

You would find Procurator Underpaidus in the same place you would find unicorns and fairies. They do not exist.

I disagree this type of manager though extremely rare does exist. Not only have I worked for one in my career I have also learned a great deal from her management skills and style. I have used her example as the building blocks to my own management and hope that I can in some way share those lessons with other so that they too will enjoy the benefits of a good manager. A dream for most but it is possible to find them.

Walter

I cna say that they DO exist, as I am lucky enough to work for one.

I've been in IT for 25+ years and moved from night operator through every level to now trying to lead a group of people in an IT department. I've had a lot of managers and still work closely with every level of management in the company. I find that I'm a lot more productive and successful if I try to find ways to work with each manager's style - whatever it may be. That's why this article of 10 disparaging labels aimed at the group I belong to and serve hits a very sour note with me. I have more questions about someone who can write an article like this than I do about any individual manager I've had or now deal with. There is little here to help IT work together, making allowances for each person, and little help for the followers to learn how to follow in a supportive way.

The only problem with this is that you have hybrids of these 10 -- one manager may exhibit qualities of 2 or more species (and not minor qualities, but major to their makeup).

I've had too many of these managers to count.

So, who is just a little bit bitter about being passed over for promotion to management?

Is there anything more tedious than 'hilarious' false Latin species names?