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My last year... a LOOOONG story

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My last year... a LOOOONG story

Locrian_Lyric
Well, about a year ago, I dropped off the grid.

Here's what happened.

I started losing focus and had a series of migraines, something I had never experienced before.

As it turns out, those were not just migraines, but mini-strokes.

I lost the ability to speak for a few days, and when it came back, I stammered badly and had a serious stutter on top of it. Words did not come to me easily and I went from having an eidetic memory to being barely able to remember basic everyday functions. I was having frequent seizure like episodes which increased until I was having several times a day.

My wife called in her father and sister and moved us to Colorado where she could have assistance caring for me and our infant daughter. Under doctors orders, I could not be left alone.

Shortly afterward, my wife had a miscarriage. Most likely this was due to the stress.

My health in general crashed. My diabetes raged out of control as did my blood pressure. I also fell into a deep depression.

The end result is that I am now under doctor's orders to abandon IT work. My mind no longer works fast enough to handle the work, and my emotional state is far too unstable to handle the stress.

Now, I am looking for something new to do for a living.

I'll answer any questions anybody may have.
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    santeewelding

    The observation is that your intellect came through just fine.

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    boxfiddler Moderator

    Nice to see you back here. :)

    etu

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    NickNielsen Moderator

    I don't know you well enough to make suggestions outright, but perhaps one or more of these questions will provide some ideas:

    What other interests or talents do you have? Is it possible you could make a living at one of those?

    Does the work location matter, or should you work from home?

    Have you looked into vocational rehab? If you can no longer do your job for medical reasons, you may be eligible for training or other support.

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    Wow

    maecuff

    You have a long road ahead of you. You have a baby girl, a family who obviously cares for you. You have a lot in your favor. Try not to lose sight of that while you're finding your way.

    I wish you all the best.

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    JamesRL

    You know we haven't always agreed, but I try as best I can to disagree with an argument, not the person, so far as it can be helped.

    You've had a rough patch. Worse than I've ever experienced, so I can't give you the voice of experience. But what I can say is that your family is more important than your career or job. You have to give yourself permission to be helped. I know its hard, especially for men. But you need time to heal, time to assess, time to think and plan.

    Let us know how we can help.

    James

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    jdclyde

    We all have issues, and all we can do is the best we can.

    Good luck getting through this.

    jd

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    DelbertPGH

    I notice you write to the point. Given a clear message, you put it across clearly. This is not an everyday gift.

    You could write about IT subjects. You have some history and expertise there. You probably also have stories to tell, from your own life. Writing them out may help you develop the gift of seeing other stories that are lying around, waiting for an author's voice.

    You may be able to do consulting, even as little as delivering, say, Excel-based VB applications to small businesses. It demands dealing with people, assessing requirements, understanding the picture, and fitting a tool to the task. Quickness of apprehension is not the same as excellence of understanding, and you may well find that your apparent mental issues are not obstacles to the important uses of your brain. Most of the programming could be done at a home office, a help to you. It would give you something else to write about, incidentally.

    Also, don't neglect the medical and physical aspects of your case. Assuming everything is linked to the diabetes, which is reasonable, you should fight it. Get rid of any grey fat piled up on your internal organs (which is suspected to be an evil agent in type 2 diabetes.) Lose weight, avoid all sugar and most simple starches, and become physically fit. These steps will help address depression as well. Become an expert in your diseases, so you can judge what your physician is telling you. Physicians are not gods; they have lots of personal shortcomings that may influence the way they work and the advice they give you. Good doctors and bad doctors are like good an bad auto mechanics; the only way you can tell if you're getting good mechanical advice is to understand your car. So, understand yourself, and get a fresh doc, or ignore some of what he says, when he's talking crap.

    Good luck to you. Men in my family have been cut back by diabetes; it's a pig of a disease. Take as much control as you can.

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    0 Votes
    santeewelding

    The observation is that your intellect came through just fine.

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    0 Votes
    boxfiddler Moderator

    Nice to see you back here. :)

    etu

    +
    0 Votes
    NickNielsen Moderator

    I don't know you well enough to make suggestions outright, but perhaps one or more of these questions will provide some ideas:

    What other interests or talents do you have? Is it possible you could make a living at one of those?

    Does the work location matter, or should you work from home?

    Have you looked into vocational rehab? If you can no longer do your job for medical reasons, you may be eligible for training or other support.

    +
    0 Votes

    Wow

    maecuff

    You have a long road ahead of you. You have a baby girl, a family who obviously cares for you. You have a lot in your favor. Try not to lose sight of that while you're finding your way.

    I wish you all the best.

    +
    0 Votes
    JamesRL

    You know we haven't always agreed, but I try as best I can to disagree with an argument, not the person, so far as it can be helped.

    You've had a rough patch. Worse than I've ever experienced, so I can't give you the voice of experience. But what I can say is that your family is more important than your career or job. You have to give yourself permission to be helped. I know its hard, especially for men. But you need time to heal, time to assess, time to think and plan.

    Let us know how we can help.

    James

    +
    0 Votes
    jdclyde

    We all have issues, and all we can do is the best we can.

    Good luck getting through this.

    jd

    +
    0 Votes
    DelbertPGH

    I notice you write to the point. Given a clear message, you put it across clearly. This is not an everyday gift.

    You could write about IT subjects. You have some history and expertise there. You probably also have stories to tell, from your own life. Writing them out may help you develop the gift of seeing other stories that are lying around, waiting for an author's voice.

    You may be able to do consulting, even as little as delivering, say, Excel-based VB applications to small businesses. It demands dealing with people, assessing requirements, understanding the picture, and fitting a tool to the task. Quickness of apprehension is not the same as excellence of understanding, and you may well find that your apparent mental issues are not obstacles to the important uses of your brain. Most of the programming could be done at a home office, a help to you. It would give you something else to write about, incidentally.

    Also, don't neglect the medical and physical aspects of your case. Assuming everything is linked to the diabetes, which is reasonable, you should fight it. Get rid of any grey fat piled up on your internal organs (which is suspected to be an evil agent in type 2 diabetes.) Lose weight, avoid all sugar and most simple starches, and become physically fit. These steps will help address depression as well. Become an expert in your diseases, so you can judge what your physician is telling you. Physicians are not gods; they have lots of personal shortcomings that may influence the way they work and the advice they give you. Good doctors and bad doctors are like good an bad auto mechanics; the only way you can tell if you're getting good mechanical advice is to understand your car. So, understand yourself, and get a fresh doc, or ignore some of what he says, when he's talking crap.

    Good luck to you. Men in my family have been cut back by diabetes; it's a pig of a disease. Take as much control as you can.