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May 28, 2005 at 12:50 am #2183078
Our society has abdicated self-reliance & personal responsibility.
Lockedby sleepin’dawg · about 18 years, 11 months ago
[b][i]What do recent findings in neuroscience tell us about the ability of people to make moral judgments or reasoned decisions? Advances in neuroscience are being used by advocates to guide public policy on a broad range of moral and ethical issues. Is this new approach really a step forward? This year, the Supreme Court heard arguments about whether developments in neurology and our understanding of brain function should affect the constitutionality of executing 16- and 17-year-olds who commit murder. New neurological findings are now being applied to a wide range of issues?drug addiction, obesity, pornography, “lie detection,” unconscious racial bias, even shopping and marketing. While there is no disputing the reality of activity patterns in the brain, the moral inferences and policy arguments being derived from our growing neurobiological knowledge raise profound questions about the nature of individual responsibility.[/i][/b]
Americans and Canadians have traditionally placed great value on self-reliance and fortitude. In recent decades, however, we have seen the rise of a therapeutic ethic that views us as emotionally underdeveloped, psychically frail, and requiring the ministrations of mental health professionals to cope with life’s vicissitudes. Being “in touch with one’s feelings” and freely expressing them have become paramount personal virtues. Today-with a book for every ailment, a counselor for every crisis, a lawsuit for every grievance, and a TV show for every conceivable problem-we are at risk of degrading our native ability to cope with life’s challenges.
Drawing on established science and common sense, reveal how “therapism” and the burgeoning trauma industry have come to pervade our lives. Help is offered everywhere under the presumption that we need it: in children’s classrooms, the workplace, churches, courtrooms, the media, the military. But with all the “help” comes a host of troubling consequences, including:
[b]The myth of stressed-out, homework-burdened, hypercompetitive, and depressed or suicidal schoolchildren in need of therapy and medication.
The loss of moral bearings in our approach to lying, crime, addiction, and other foibles and vices.
The unasked-for “grief counselors” who descend on bereaved families, schools, and communities following a tragedy, offering dubious advice while billing plenty of money.
The expansion of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder from an affliction of war veterans to nearly everyone who has experienced any kind of setback.[/b]
We should know that [b][i]”talking about”[/i][/b] problems is no substitute for [b]confronting[/b] them. We are developing into a society of wimps and if we aren’t careful we could lose our competitive edge against other cultures who are not being [b][i]’crippled'[/i][/b] by these false PC ideologies.
Dawg ]:)
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May 28, 2005 at 7:19 am #3180286
Strange isn’t it ?
by tony hopkinson · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Our society has abdicated self-reliance & personal responsibility.
The people who need therapy can’t afford it, so therapist’s sold the need for their services to those who could. Not all of you are whining wimps, kick them in the crutch and take what you want. Gives them something to talk about in their next session.
That dawg fellow has no respect for my sensibilities
Really ? That’ll be a $1000 !
Oh good I feel so much better.Sheep exist to be fleeced and pussies exist to be …
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May 28, 2005 at 9:31 am #3180278
Talk about pc
by tony hopkinson · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Strange isn’t it ?
you can’t say p.u.s.s.i.e.s now. fucks sake.
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May 31, 2005 at 10:48 am #3181080
Actually, I took it to mean a$$holes and continued with exist to be wiped.
by sleepin’dawg · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Talk about pc
I think I like my version better. :^O
Dawg ]:)
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May 28, 2005 at 8:59 am #3180283
Confrontation
by firstpeter · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Our society has abdicated self-reliance & personal responsibility.
But we CAN’T confront them because we might get our feelings hurt when we realize we might be at fault for having done something wrong.
And if we’ve caused the problem (oh, wait, it’s not a PROBLEM, it’s an OPPORTUNITY, right?) we might hurt our fragile self-esteem.
And Heaven forbid we hurt our self-esteem! After all, isn’t that what makes us grow? Apparently all these years (200+) we’ve been thinking it was actually learning from experience, addressing our problems, and being willing to take responsibility for the things we do that helped us grow. But apparently we were wrong.
It seems as though we got really lucky these last couple hundred years that we (the United States of America) were able to grow as strong as we did. How in the world did we survive without six dozen books on our colonial bookshelf telling us how to “talk about it” and “get in touch with our inner self”? How did we manage to grow generation after generation of good, solid, moral, ethical, humble leaders without having read sixteen “self-help” articles about how we shouldn’t discipline our kids? How did we manage to get by simply by accepting people at their word and not filing a lawsuit for every single act of injustice we THINK we saw?
Don’t get me started, Dawg; the “poor me” attitudes that pervade just about every aspect of culture (except church; at least from my experiences) are driving me absolutely crazy. I wonder if I could file a lawsuit against all those people who are trying to convince us that nothing is our fault on the basis that they’re driving me insane…? 🙂
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May 28, 2005 at 9:23 am #3180280
“The unasked-for”
by absolutely · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Our society has abdicated self-reliance & personal responsibility.
1) If I want your help, I’ll ask for it. Stress, trauma, neurosis and psychosis are by definition subjective. Don’t dare try to tell me I need help because I “look troubled,” you’ll be the one needing help.
2) The FDA takes 10 years to approve a new sleeping pill. Who are these “advocates to guide public policy on a broad range of moral and ethical issues” based on last week’s research, and why should I care about their opinion? Are they the neuroscience researchers themselves, or some undergraduate dropout scientist wannabes who understand 10% of the vocabulary of the cutting-edge, and are able to pass themselves off as experts among less knowledgeable policy hacks?
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May 28, 2005 at 10:28 am #3180257
The worst is child developement experts
by jdclyde · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Our society has abdicated self-reliance & personal responsibility.
that have never had kids of their own.
Kids are different when you are with them 24/7 vs the 2 hours that they were “evaluated” while they play with other kids.
Disipline and respect. Don’t they have a place in our society anymore?
When is the last time you heard a kid in a store say please and thank you?
When you thank them they say “yeah” instead of “your welcome”.
If you haven’t had ten kids of your own all grow up to be brain surgins, don’t try to tell me how to raise my kids.
Anyone see a month back (in Michigan, of course) the theripist mother was stabbed to death 101 times by her son because she was upset he was looking at porn on the computer and was going to take it away. Guess the “time out” didn’t do the trick.
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May 29, 2005 at 3:37 am #3179504
Agree…
by black panther · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to The worst is child developement experts
Even the “bible” mentions discipline
Proverbs 22:1-29
Foolishness is tied up with the heart of a boy; the rod of discipline is what will remove it far from him.
Proverbs 13:1-25
The one holding back his rod is hating his son, but the one loving him is he that does look for him with discipline.
also the teacher must teach by example:–
“Do you, however, the one teaching someone else, not teach yourself? You, the one preaching ‘Do not steal,’ do you steal? You, the one saying ‘Do not commit adultery,’ do you commit adultery?”?Romans 2:21, 22.
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May 31, 2005 at 11:41 am #3181047
Another Biblical passage
by montgomery gator · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Agree…
“Do not withhold correction from a child, For if you beat him with a rod, he will not die. You shall beat him with a rod, And deliver his soul from hell” – Proverbs 23:13-14
The Bible is definitely in favor of corporal punishment and discipline, in the light of this and the previously quoted passages. I am not going to argue with Holy Scripture on this one. King Solomon (the author of the Book of Proverbs) had a lot of children, so he must have known something about the subject.
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May 28, 2005 at 10:48 am #3180255
Nuclear Family and Neighborhoods
by thechas · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Our society has abdicated self-reliance & personal responsibility.
What started this trend was the demise of the nuclear family and the change from living in neighborhoods to living in subdivisions.
Our consumption based society all but forces both parents to work to pay for the desires of the family.
We need to return to living in neighborhoods so that children know that the old lady on the corner WILL inform their parents when they misbehave.
We need to step back to living near our families so that we don’t need to turn to professional consolers when we have a crisis.
We need to move back to 2 parent families where 1 parent is ALWAYS at home when the children are home. (Stay at home dads are just as valuable as stay at home moms.)
We need to switch college scholarships from athletic to academic. This will reduce the pressure that parents place on children to be both athletes and scholars.
Chas
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May 29, 2005 at 1:05 am #3179524
I agree
by cuteelf · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Nuclear Family and Neighborhoods
I agree that having less time to put to a family’s needs degrades the behavior.
I also agree that it is a choice for each parent to work /not to work.
But at the same time, women are now more “allowed”, shall I say, into certain fields that years ago they may not have been welcomed or able to break into. I personally as a woman, feel opened..and glad, to have the rights of females widened. And a bit obliged to follow into the fields.
So, as a woman, I can go out and follow my dreams of being a Network Engineer, and make pretty maps and great configs…or….spend time at home raising children.
Can I do both? I dont know. I’d like to have kids, later…but in Europe.Europe itself is a more laid back area, still focusing on the nuclear family.
America strides for independance, and that spread to all beings equals less family- more independance- less family.
So, since I’m still singel and childless, I’ll focus on my career.
If I find a man, I’ll make myself clear to him about what I believe. And that HE has to take a few months off too, for the baby.
And I plan on making the buggers work for themselves too.
CuteElf
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May 29, 2005 at 6:32 am #3179491
Womens rights vs feminism
by jdclyde · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to I agree
I think the idea to allow anyone to go out and be who or what they want is great.
I think if the mother makes enough money that men can stay at home with the kids.
What I DON’T like is the feminist movement telling women that they are a falure or wasting their lives if they are ONLY a housewife. Whlie many did not give the housewife enough credit for everything she did, it was having a parent around all the time that makes a difference to the raising of kids. How can you think dropping a kid off at day care all day is productive to them becomeing good reaponsivle people? Then we wonder why kids today have no respect and no ambition.
The parents that make lots of money but are never around tend to spend more money on the kids to make up to them for not being good parents. Then kids grow up expecting everything to just be given to them. Do you know how hard it is to find kids that babysit anymore?
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May 29, 2005 at 9:20 am #3179460
Now you know why many men avoid commitment!
by sleepin’dawg · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to I agree
If men can control their emotional need to procreate they will also control their emotional needs for monagamus relationships. The individualistic tribal instinct of procreation can and will be suppressed giving rise to more single parent family units. Women are, unfortunately, not equipped by nature to compete in this environment. Why is it, that in the last 10 years, so many single men have taken to demanding vasectomies??? Is the drive for success makeing them shy away from encumbering themselves with dependants??? Corespondingly, is this why so many women put off child bearing so that they can compete with men, careerwise, on a more equal footing??? There are men who are driven to compete and who will not allow anything to obstuct their drive to success. Many men, after fathering the supposedly required 2 offspring, preferably one of each gender, will secretly take steps to eliminate their procreating abilities. Others will avoid committing to any relationships until their career paths are well established and they are better placed financially to support a family. Women, who have opted for the career driven lifestyle are often postponing child bearing until many times they are placing their health and that of the offspring at hazard. This does not mean that men are superior to women, far from it. In many ways, due to nature, women have many more obstacles to overcome, to succed on the career success track however, before I would ever publically admit this, you would find me under the bar with a spitoon on my chest. If you need to know what a spitoon is, then you are too young for me to have to worry about being overhauled on the career track.
[b][i]’Just when you think you’ve beaten the rat race, along comes a faster breed(gender?) of rat!'[/i][/b] :^O
Dawg ]:)
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May 31, 2005 at 8:38 am #3180536
that’s me!
by jck · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Now you know why many men avoid commitment!
I made the commitment to wait until after I was out with my degree before I’d consider a serious relationship.
It’s 11 years after I got my degree. Hahahaha!
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May 31, 2005 at 9:16 pm #3180824
Yeah but you keep telling us you’re swill. You’ve got to……………….
by sleepin’dawg · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to that’s me!
stop calling yourself that and come up wih a better marketing strategy. Try convincing the women that you’re the greatest thing since green garbage bags. Hell, you’d better convince yourself first. Get rid of the defeatist attitude.
Mind you I’m assuming you have the normal complement of extremities and don’t frighten old ladies, dogs or little children and they won’t start crying when you appear.Dawg ]:)
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June 1, 2005 at 6:12 am #3179724
I don’t think he choose that title
by jdclyde · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Yeah but you keep telling us you’re swill. You’ve got to……………….
he worked hard to earn it, so it was given to him. Was that Sal that bestowed that on you jck?
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June 1, 2005 at 7:00 am #3179650
no
by jck · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to I don’t think he choose that title
it was ITgirli for me joking I was going to get me an 18 year old. She made it “official” at that point.
can’t even pop a little witty humour on here sometimes without someone with a popsicle stick up their arse getting in a tizzy.
I don’t mind labels anyways…I’ve been called names my whole life, including from family members. So, the callous is thick…I can take it.
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June 1, 2005 at 7:28 am #3179638
It might have been but more likely it was Jess or IT.
by sleepin’dawg · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to I don’t think he choose that title
In one post he jokingly referred to himself as swill and one of them took it and ran with it.
Dawg ]:)
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June 1, 2005 at 7:42 am #3179632
History of my magnanamous swillishness
by jck · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to I don’t think he choose that title
Originally, ITgirli commented pretty much that anyone who listened to Howard Stern (I had talked about him and that I listened to him) was swill.
Then, I teased her a lot about me being swill.
Then, Jessie said I was swill.
Then, ITgirli thanked me for proving I was.
I’m King of the Swill…WOOOHOOO!!!!
Like I said…I don’t care what other people call me. I’ve been called worse, often times by my own mother. The callous is really tough. I can handle it.
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June 1, 2005 at 6:57 am #3179653
OK…here’s the lowdown…judge for yourself
by jck · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Yeah but you keep telling us you’re swill. You’ve got to……………….
Wanna know about me?
6’5 1/2″, 297 lbs
Brown Hair
Brown Eyes
Degree in Computer Science with Minor in Mathematics
Play several instruments (although not well anymore)
IQ has tested (in the last 10 years on various tests) between 136 and 178
I like most animals
I have 6 computers in my house
I like to work on cars
If I read, I mostly read technical magazines
I don’t go to church, but believe in God
I write software for a living
I drive a Kia Sportage
I am the youngest of 4
I love Guinness
I hate political correctnessThere ya go…judge me for yourself, everyone.
Pardon me, I gotta get the fire-retardant suit on so that the flames I’ll get for all that info won’t burn me.
BTW, I do frighten people usually because of my size. Everyone thinks a big guy has to be a ruffian.
Anyways…let me have it.
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June 1, 2005 at 8:57 am #3179591
jck, back in the dawn of PC, I’d ruffle the feminists by………………
by sleepin’dawg · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to OK…here’s the lowdown…judge for yourself
saying deliberately provocative things like,”I think women are great.”(pause for effect and then add),”I think every guy should own one.” I would say things like that as if I was giving a product endorsement. At other times, commenting on my marriage, I’d say, “My marriage is something weird and wonderful.”(again with the pause)”She’s weird and I’m wonderful.” Another time, shortly after my divorce, someone asked me when I had noticed my marriage going downhill and my reply set every guy in the room laughing but every woman in the room jumped on me like a pack of wild dogs on twenty pounds of raw meat. My reply was, “You married guys should know better. Marriage is never downhill; it was uphill all the way.” Now don’t ask me why, because the women in that room were totally pissed at me but I managed to acquire a bunch of phone numbers that evening. I threw a lot of them away because some were the wives of friends but what I’ll never for the life of me understand, is if these women were so angry with me, why would they give me their phone numbers? Strange, isn’t it? I’ve come to the conclusion that I will never understand women except in the abstract. I have a lot of friends of the female persuasion and I enjoy talking to them, advising them about men or kids, helping with electrical or plumbing problems or just plain old listening to them. They give me little gifts for my birthday or Christmas. They try to throw parties for my birthday, which is sometimes awkward since my way of celebrating my birthday is to take that day for myself. I don’t mind being the focus of attention at someone else’s party but on my day I usually prefer being by myself or with one special person. I caught hell last year because I took off sailing and somebody had planned a surprise party. Since it was to be a surprise nobody let me in on the secret and so they were somewhat annoyed when they threw their party and the guest of honor was nowhere to be found. On my day, there are no cell phones and I had left at 6 A.M. My male friends had warned them that a surprise party for me was a bad idea because they knew from past experience that I’m seldom to be found on my birthday and yet for the next couple of weeks we were all in the doghouse because I had messed up their plans. How in hell was I supposed to know, I ask you???
I get something similar at Christmas which I celebrate very quietly since that particular holiday has a lot of bad connotations for me but all my female friends feel that since I’m unattached I should be spending it with them and their families. I know they are trying to be kind but I’m really not good company at Christmas due to a lot of baggage in my past. I count it as a good Christmas if nothing bad happens and I dread the season until Dec 27th is past, after which I heave a sigh of relief that nothing dire has transpired. That whole holiday season sort of creeps me out.
I don’t see anything particularly wrong with your list but I have noticed in the past that you’ve had very tight requirements on what you are looking for in a woman. I’d suggest you loosen up a tad. There are no perfect women out there; they don’t exist just as perfect men do not exist. We all have little foibles that can annoy someone espcially when in the close contacts of a relationship. There are some things you can’t compromise on but if it’s something minor like leaving the toilet seat up or forgetting the cap on the toothpaste, well then if you care enough, you don’t let these little things become deal breakers. You adjust and compromise. Something that always annoys me is stockings or pantyhose hanging in the john but is that something you should let ruin an otherwise nice relationship??? Why??? It’s trivial but if that’s what’s keeping you from a relationship then I’ll bet there are a lot more serious problems you haven’t acknowledged or dealt with. The thing I think that’s holding you back is fear of trust and fear of getting hurt. Yes if you care and your trust is betrayed, you will be hurt and at that point you will know you cared. Anytime you care there is the potential of getting hurt but you have to put it out there. Sure you could get hurt but then maybe you won’t. If you want to win the lottery you at least, first, have to buy a ticket. Don’t be too picky. Sure you’re looking for a rose but the daisies can be kind of nice also. Remember this, the woman you are interested in is probably looking for a millionaire, studmuffin whose a gourmet chef, a great lover and handy around the house but she is willing to settle for you. As Red Green the king of duct tape might say, “If women don’t find you handsome they should at least find you handy.” There’s something to that.
Good hunting!
Dawg ]:) -
June 1, 2005 at 9:13 am #3179587
finding that right woman…
by jck · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to OK…here’s the lowdown…judge for yourself
actually, I don’t have any of those hangups you mentioned about toilet seats and panty hose hanging. If anything, a woman would like me. I come pre-trained. I put the seat back down when I’m done draining. 3 women constantly berating me drove it into my bathroom habits.
As for the fear of getting hurt…you betcha. Women have (including all the women in my immediate family) crapped on me all my life, played me over, used me, taken from me, etc. What would make anyone think that I (or for that matter, any other man) should just trust all women OR men?
I get out… I go to pubs… stores… restaurants… quick stops… and I meet girls. I have hung out with women, but they seem not to pan out for one reason or another. Like the past few:
– One ended up being a recreational drug user
– One was looking for a political powerbroker
– One ended up being married and wanted me for her boytoySo, I don’t think I’m too choosy. I do have standards and I’m not afraid to say what they are. But, I’m not going to go around croaking my dating standards all the time like some droning bullfrog on a lillypad looking for a mate. And, I won’t be guilty of hiding things about me that are unappealing…like you said, none of us are perfect…just that some hide it longer than others.
Plus, I really don’t go for a woman because she’s good-looking, famous, rich, or notable. I look for character in a woman. I could care less if she has 5 cars, a Cosmo cover, or her family name is known world-wide. I’m more concerned with what kind of woman she is, how she expresses herself, what her feelings are, how she deals with adversity, etc.
When the right girl for me comes along, and I’m the right guy for her…all things will click. I wouldn’t let little things like a toilet seat deal, or pantyhose on a towel bar, or any of that be a deal breaker.
So tell me…should I have been a boy toy????? ]:)
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June 1, 2005 at 9:44 am #3179569
Hey, who knows for sure if you didn’t to suss out the reasons…………..
by sleepin’dawg · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to OK…here’s the lowdown…judge for yourself
for her lack of marital fidelity. Maybe she had a reason and then again maybe not. The thing here is, you will never know. Listening and being observant could have told you lots. Maybe you did and that’s why you walked but I don’t know, however, if you didn’t how can you be sure you didn’t walk away from something that might have turned into something nice. We all have been crapped on at one time or another and women always are cast in the role of chief crapper. Are you really sure some of it wasn’t justified??? Do you really see yourself as a shlt magnet when it comes to women??? If so you are not meeting the right women.
Dawg ]:)
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June 1, 2005 at 10:04 am #3179563
yes…I am the magnet supreme, I guess
by jck · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to OK…here’s the lowdown…judge for yourself
I mean, I have met nice girls…circumstances just didn’t work out.
For instance, one girl I knew from NC was great. She had been engaged to a guy when we met, but wasn’t with him at the time. I went up to hang out with her in NC. I get there…she says “We’re back together.” What a dampener, eh?
She ended up leaving him because he went back to doing drugs and stuff. But by the time I found that out, she’d gotten another boyfriend.
We did have a talk one night and she said “I don’t think we ever could have been together. I love it here and I know you love it too much in Florida to move.” Then I replied, “For the right thing, I’d move to the arctic.” She seemed stunned at the fact I’d make the right woman the priority over where I live.
I don’t know…maybe I just come off wrong.
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June 3, 2005 at 11:25 am #3172269
Big guys don’t scare me!!!
by jessie · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to OK…here’s the lowdown…judge for yourself
I have a 14 year old son (just turned on 5/31) who is 6’4″ 286 lbs and he’s the biggest teddy-bear on the face of the planet. 🙂 I got my bluff in early so he don’t scare me a bit! Of course, I’m not a short woman either, but size doesn’t matter at all when it comes to personality.
I know a lot of short guys who beat the crap out of anybody and everybody just to prove they can. Large men tend to be more secure in their manliness and don’t have to prove it when not provoked.
Of course, being large, you probably had littler people picking on you when you were a kid so they could look tougher if they “took you down.” My son used to get that frequently… but he’s learned to get his bluff in too, so doesn’t have to deal with it so much anymore.
Best of luck to you on finding a woman who can put up with you 😉 I truly wish you no ill-will.
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May 29, 2005 at 2:59 am #3179510
I say income taxes and the 1970s counter culture.
by garion11 · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Nuclear Family and Neighborhoods
Good points but I disagree on the motivation of why both parents have to work. 1970’s counter culture has had a lot to do with this feminist attitudes, free love, and other crap. Not to politicize this thing, but cost of living is requiring both parents to work not mention TV which has become a baby sitter.
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May 29, 2005 at 6:38 am #3179490
Materialism
by jdclyde · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to I say income taxes and the 1970s counter culture.
the worship of things and allowing advertisers to make us think we need a TV in every room of the house. A hummer in the driveway instead of the bedroom is NOT a good trade!
In many cases it is because people CHOOSE to live at a higher level of debt because of all the STUFF they need to have to make their miserable lives mean anything. Doesn’t matter if you don’t have time to use it all because your working instead.
Ten years after you die, would you rather have an employer saying what a good worker you were or your kids telling the grandkids what a great parent you were.
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May 30, 2005 at 4:53 am #3179305
Hmmm
by tony hopkinson · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Materialism
I describe my father as a good dad, because he worked his ass off to put food on the table, a roof over my head and clothes on my back. What his employer thought of him, or some pc navel gazing twit who thought he didn’t spend enough quality time with me, don’t even come into the equation.
The debt thing, is a harder one. Certainly I’m much more comfortable with a higher level of debt than my parents were, though not nearly as comfortable as my kids. Personally I think that’s because lenders are much more comfortable with people’s ability to pay than they used to be. As an average sort of income person I can borrow far more than my father would have been allowed to, even if he had been comfortable with it.
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May 30, 2005 at 5:47 am #3179295
Making ends meet vs excessive
by jdclyde · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Hmmm
Your dad providing for his family is very different from the mother and father of today that BOTH are gone the excessive amounts of time just to get more STUFF.
My point is that people today are have way more than people a generation ago did, but are less content with it. It is never enough.
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May 30, 2005 at 2:15 pm #3180790
Nope the stuff has changed
by tony hopkinson · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Making ends meet vs excessive
I could n’t survive without food. My kids couldn’t survive without their own sound system,pc, dvd tv, game station, dumb ass useless mini scooter, roller blades, walkman cd predator football boots, 500 pairs of baggy designer labelled trousers ad nauseum.
My son once suddenly decided he had to have a kite. One ball of wool a polythene bag and a bit of wire, I’m all ready for some quality time with the boy. Had to make him come out and get it.
Brought back happy memories for me, he just sat there and pretended he wasn’t with my cheap ass, must confess I nearly got upset, after putting all that effort in.
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May 30, 2005 at 2:33 pm #3180785
made it?
by jdclyde · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Nope the stuff has changed
Every kid knows that nothing you make is as good as you can buy! If it doesn’t have sulifane it can’t be any good.
doesn’t matter if that cheap kite you would have bought instead would have broken after the first five minutes (provided it didn’t break while putting it together).
Yeah, I never had a tv or computer or sterio in my room. We didn’t even HAVE a game console, let alone the five my boys have now. cheese and rice, I am as bad as the rest of you! At least I usually pay cash.
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June 3, 2005 at 1:05 pm #3172231
Well to be fair
by tony hopkinson · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Nope the stuff has changed
All the stuff wasn’t even science fiction when I was a boy. OK the tv was around, but only rich people had a colourset, that could get all three channels. Really rich people had the remote, the one with the three inch diameter cable that never reached your chair.
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May 29, 2005 at 3:37 am #3179505
Think that ‘s another symptom
by tony hopkinson · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Nuclear Family and Neighborhoods
of abdication of responsibility towards society.
If you walk past some kids doing something wrong, do you tell them to amend their behavior, or do you ignore it and say it’s nothing to do with me. Even worse nowadays, can you afford to interfere, the consequences could be extreme.Left wing nanny state culture immediately followed by right wing me me me seems to have done the job, certainly in the UK. The responsibility to society was taken away by one philosophy and then binned by another.
So I blame my parents !
Tee Hee-
May 29, 2005 at 7:09 am #3179485
I agree
by jdclyde · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Think that ‘s another symptom
I blame your parent too!
Oh, that isn’t what I meant to say….
It is true, if you say something then you are passing judgement based on your beliefs of what is right and wrong making you a threat to the safety of the world.
I would say your parents didn’t do bad, so I will let them slid, this time.
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June 3, 2005 at 3:39 am #3172530
Chas – Something just occured to me
by maxwell edison · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Nuclear Family and Neighborhoods
You always seem to speak in the collective voice. “We need to do” this or that. By definition, if you see your lot in life as a collective effort, you are actually suggesting that other people don’t have the capacity for self-responsibility. Moreover, you, yourself, are assuming that responsibility for them. That’s a lose-lose proposition in my book. It’s no wonder you always seem to have such a gloomy outlook.
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May 29, 2005 at 8:00 am #3179480
The Even Sadder Consideration
by maxwell edison · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Our society has abdicated self-reliance & personal responsibility.
Look at it this way. Which option will you choose?
1. I feel that I should be totally responsible for myself.
2. I feel that other people, either entirely or in part, should take responsibility for me.
Quite frankly, I don’t think I’ve ever met a person who would choose option number two, at least not that he or she would openly and freely admit, and/or without overlooking what it really was. What’s interesting, however, is that I’ve meet scores of people who would presume to choose option number two for others. And quite frankly, I don’t understand how a person can expect less of others than he or she expects of himself — and/or fail to give others as much credit as a person may give him or her self.
Disclaimer: Please refrain from lumping the truly needy, those who are literally either physically or mentally incapable of caring for themselves, into my categories. If you try to do that, it doesn’t apply to my sentiment, and you know it. And if you do it, you should be ashamed of yourself for being so disingenuous.
Why do people pick option number one for themselves but option number two for others? The answer is GUILT.
AND-OR
People may choose option two for themselves (but not openly admit it for what it really is) because they are GREEDY – They want to take something that belongs to someone else, pure and simple. But they disguise their GREED by wanting a government middle-man to do it for them. Eliminate the middle-man, and what do you have?
AND-OR
Substitute FEAR for GREED (or apply both).
And-OR
“GetEvenWithEmIsm” – A subset of greed, they feel that they are entitled to something that another person owns and/or has earned, just because that other person may have more, or at least is perceived to have more. (Note: I added this category after some thought.)
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May 29, 2005 at 9:31 am #3179459
Well said!!! Could not have expressed it better, myself.
by sleepin’dawg · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to The Even Sadder Consideration
As I said our society is abdicating peronal responsibility and self-reliance. Fear or greed; too many people are being kept too contented on the dole and thus making the tax man keep dipping his hand(s) deeper and deeper into our pockets. It has now reached the proportions of being truly disgusting.
Dawg ]:)
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May 29, 2005 at 8:25 pm #3179392
Judgment on One’s Self
by black panther · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to The Even Sadder Consideration
There is no judgment except the judgment one levels at oneself. (Kevin Williams)
The greatest exploration is the exploration of oneself!
No-one can hurt your feelings unless you allow it to happen!
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May 29, 2005 at 9:10 pm #3179380
I agree 100 percent
by maxwell edison · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Judgment on One’s Self
But what’s your point?
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May 29, 2005 at 10:55 pm #3179365
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June 3, 2005 at 11:56 am #3172260
Dangit Max, STOP!!!
by jessie · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to The Even Sadder Consideration
You’ve just said something else that I agree with… how can you DO this to me?!?!?! What happened to me that made you seem so logical? Is it just my pregnancy hormones?
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June 3, 2005 at 12:54 pm #3172239
Better watch out Jess
by jdclyde · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Dangit Max, STOP!!!
or you just might find yourself voting Republican next time around. lmao!
It is called “growing up”. Everyone does it, just takes some longer than others….
Go to the light Jess, go to the light!
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June 1, 2005 at 6:33 am #3179710
Have you noticed how few people comment
by maxwell edison · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Our society has abdicated self-reliance & personal responsibility.
Taking full and total self-responsibility is a hard thing to do — a very hard thing to do considering the state of society today. In reality and in practice, very few people do it. Even the ones who say they assume full and total self-responsibility, often times don’t. On one hand, they might say they do, but then on the other hand they make excuses for any number of things. And it’s a contradiction in terms to profess self-responsibility but to blame others for undesirable outcomes.
I would like to see a message from someone who admits that he or she is not responsible for his or her own life and/or outcome, and then reasonably justify it. Most people, in my opinion, would like to think they do, but they really don’t — and they will never admit it. Just look at the number of people who haven’t chimed in.
It seems that in today’s society, taking full responsibility for one’s self and never making excuses or blaming others, is tantamount to going over to the dark side. But in reality, the force is much greater over here, and the outcomes will always be better.
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June 1, 2005 at 6:50 am #3179659
It isn’t my fault
by jdclyde · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Have you noticed how few people comment
I wanted to be 6’2″ but am 5’11” instead.
I blame my parents for this. I ate my veggies and drank my milk and it didn’t work.
Oh, that isn’t quite what you had in mind?
Ok, it is much later in life to finally have a degree and real job because chasing girls and partying real hard was more important at the time.
It was my choise, and now my choice is to finish my degree and start partying again on the weeks I don’t have the boys.
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June 1, 2005 at 9:25 am #3179577
Outcomes better? You would still have to live with yourself.
by sleepin’dawg · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Have you noticed how few people comment
If one can so easily compromise one’s personal integrity and honor how can one look in oneself’s eye in the mirror??? If it were that easy for me to compromise my integrity, what good would I be??? If my integrity and honor are worthless, wouldn’t that make me worthless???
I try to maintain my honor by living up to my word; I may not always be successful at it but I at least try and when I fail, I will admit my failure. I do not trumpet it but when I give my word I try my damnedest to keep it. I do not trumpet my errors but if and when they are brought up, I will admit them. To do less would be a disgrace and would dishonor myself. I can’t know for a certainty but I like to think my code has gotten me to where I’m at today. Honor, duty, country, those are the keys but honor is always first because without it you are nothing.
Dawg ]:)
[i]Sorry Max!!! Didn’t mean to get on my soapbox.[/i]
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June 3, 2005 at 3:32 am #3172533
Living with yourself IS an outcome
by maxwell edison · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Outcomes better? You would still have to live with yourself.
I certainly agree with what you said, dawg. But I’m not sure if you were questioning my intent or adding to it. Of course a person has to live with himself. And taking total responsibility for one’s life — taking full ownership of it — will indeed produce a better outcome. And a better outcome can be measured in whatever may drive one’s life. Whether it be a quest to be happier, have more friends, helping more people, be more financially secure, raise better children, or anything else; taking full and total self-responsibility is the ONLY way to assume full ownership of your life, and it will ALWAYS produce a better outcome for you. If nothing else, it will produce a better outlook. And I’ve never met anyone who has a great outlook but generally doesn’t get what he or she strives for in life (as described above). It’s the people with gloomy outlooks who always seem unfulfilled and, in the spirit of your discussion, never accept full and total responsibility for it. There’s always someone or something else to blame.
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June 3, 2005 at 11:00 am #3172281
Actually I was agreeing but just had to jump on my soapbox……………..
by sleepin’dawg · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Living with yourself IS an outcome
in making a comment. The world is filled with too many who refuse to face up to their duties and responsibilites and as a result have lost their honor and as far as I, for one, am concerned, any credibility they might have been entitled to. I may have to deal with people like this but for me their character will be always suspect; a flawed part of the whole, to be removed whenever a suitable replacement can be found. Unfortunately, we’re dealing with personalities and not machinery but that is often the image that comes to mind when I hear another story about a welfare cheater. Too bad these people are not like toilet paper; disposable, so we could flush them.
Dawg ]:)
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June 3, 2005 at 1:10 pm #3172230
Unfortunately
by tony hopkinson · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Outcomes better? You would still have to live with yourself.
it’s those who occasionally lapse who have problems with the mirror, bleeders who don’t even admit to anything being wrong can look themselves in the eye all day.
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June 3, 2005 at 12:09 pm #3172256
I can’t say…
by jessie · about 18 years, 10 months ago
In reply to Have you noticed how few people comment
… that I never make excuses. I haven’t reached Enlightenment yet, and I’m still only STRIVING for it. I do TRY to be fully responsible for my own actions. Any number of times, I’ve been the one to say, “Uh, my fault, let me fix it.” I can also honestly admit, that shame and fear have had me making excuses on occassion. I TRY not to live my life this way, but nobody’s perfect… least of all, me.
Again, honestly, when I realize that I’ve reacted from a gut reaction of fear or shame, I immediately strive to rectify the situation… but sometimes, it takes me a while to come to a full realization.
I’ve been known to apologize 3 months later for things I’ve said or done, that other people have completely forgotten about.
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