10. Auxilium scriptomania: "Know-nothing" help desk analystThis is a particularly dangerous Help Desker, and one I had the misfortune to encounter only this week. This one will stick to the script no matter how irrelevant and or unhelpful. As an example I will give a brief reconut of the call I had:
?Tech- “Hi my name is xxx how may I help you today?”
?Me-”Good Morning, this is Jeff, one of the field techs, can you please reset the download flag for unit number xxxxxxx.”
?Tech-”Sure, first I will need some details from you--your name and company name, your email address…”?Me-”No, I’m one of your guys, I just need the download flag reset.”
?Tech-”Sure, can you remove the mains cord for me and wait one full minute then restart the machine.”
?Me-”No, there is no problem with the machine, I just need the download reset”.
?Tech-”Please hold one moment”
?20 minutes of Mantovani ----
?Tech-”Thank you for holding, is there anything else I can help you with today?”
?This call usually takes about 8 seconds, but Auxilium Scriptomania can make it last forever.
Caption by: Jeff Dray
Photo credit: ©iStockphoto.com/SchulteProductions
Bill Detwiler has nothing to disclose. He doesn't hold investments in the technology companies he covers.
Bill Detwiler is Managing Editor of TechRepublic and Tech Pro Research and the host of Cracking Open, CNET and TechRepublic's popular online show. Prior to joining TechRepublic in 2000, Bill was an IT manager, database administrator, and desktop support specialist in the social research and energy industries. He has bachelor's and master's degrees from the University of Louisville, where he has also lectured on computer crime and crime prevention.