Leadership

20 worst-named tech products, ever

38 comments
vordan
vordan

Dear TechRepublic, Have you ever heard of AJAX and asynchronous loading of images and HTML? Your galleries are so tiring, waiting for reloads where just 3-4% of the page has actually changed.

fjp
fjp

I like Ping a lot more than Bing. Not sure why - it just sounds better, IMHO.

rog.ersa
rog.ersa

what a load of bo****ks very confused about the last 20 worst names .................some are pretty cool BAD ......maybe you should go back to basics and look at your prospective on technology

RW17
RW17

What a useless article. I expected intelligent laughs about poor choices of product names. Instead, I got a guy writing about names of products he simply did not like! When in marketing class, your professor tells you the Chevy Nova should not have been marketed in Spanish countries, that realization through the used name is funny. When Gerber put babies on their labels of baby food in Africa, where many are illiterate and so labels are used to represent what is IN the jar, that is horrifically funny! Instead, this author reports on names that are no different from any other product in the tech market. If the iPod was not successful, does the name actually imply exactly what it is...? Or was it a 1-person tent by Columbia, and even smaller office cubicle, or a 1-legged "tripod" for a camera? What about the iPad... if it were not successful, would you know what it is? Could it have been an even smaller batchelor condominium, a novel new creation to replace the black patch on a Pirate's eye, or a feminine hygiene product? Seriously... if you don't have anything to write about, don't write anything. The information age has become the "useless journalism age".

Mr. Content
Mr. Content

Hopefully the author is recovering from the horrific accident that is now limiting his long-term memory at two years or so. Hence, the use of only products less than two years old in a piece titled "20 worst-named tech products, ever." Looks more like an exercise trying to create content while cleaning out two-year-old vendor photos from a folder on the author's system. How about some research?

DSchr
DSchr

iPad is bad. What rushes into your mind with the word pad?

AnsuGisalas
AnsuGisalas

refers to the visual ugliness overload of the device: it is such a burden on the sensory system that any sane person reaches for the Mute ki... can't handle any sound when eyes are bleeding.

Mandolinface
Mandolinface

. All any of these companies had to do was walk around their offices and get 10 people to read the proposed name aloud. If one person says it funny, dump the name. There's a quite good software audio synthesizer called Z3TA. I suppose they thought people would look at it and think "ZETA," but I bet I'm not the only one who reads it, "ZeeThreeTa." Rule one: Never use a name that contains characters other than letters of the alphabet.

seanferd
seanferd

Not really a game-changer, and hardly as stupid as "Google". You're just used to it. edit: Some of those names are pretty bad, but the rest are about average. OTOH, you can throw in about any name which starts with a lowercase "i" or has "Live" in it.

anne.powel
anne.powel

Perhaps if you're saying the Pentax * was a goofy name, you shouldn't have a picture of a Samsung phone?

calistra
calistra

I was in the CEO's office a good few years ago to discuss my future now they were closing the company that I had helped build over more than a decade and had been flushed down the tube by new management.... ...and somewhere in the conversation I asked about one of the products of another company in the group - a DECT phone. I guess the guy who pitched the idea was either speaking in an American accent or had a bad sense of humour, anyway I said "Who on earth decided to call one of our products the Uranus?" From the ensuing silence I kind of figured out whose idea it was.....

seanferd
seanferd

from the point of view of one of the aliens: I, Pod.

marthill
marthill

Next you'll be telling us NASA is lame having all those rocket pads and how could IBM have called their laptops ThinkPads and oh man all those batchelor pads, legal notepads and how dorky are those football players with their shoulder pads and don't tell skaters their knee pads are baaaaad or the height of uncoolness, Rap stars with their synth pads and drum pads. Media beat-up pure and simple.

seanferd
seanferd

:p Wait, no, don't tell me.

IMDB
IMDB

iLiner, iPersonal Products, ietc.

dallastokyo
dallastokyo

If I'm not mistaken, in Japanese, "Muteki" means "invincible mutant tech robot sound system ninja"...well, actually it just means "invincible" or "unrivaled", but the rest is implied, I think.

SirWizard
SirWizard

My best friend worked for a guy who named his business Whagaa. (This was just outside Silicon Valley in California from a white guy who only speaks English, so there can be no "foreign language" excuse.) It was supposed to be involved in small video devices, but you couldn't even get to a device when your eyes are bleeding from the company name.

wizard57m-cnet
wizard57m-cnet moderator

What you and I may consider "alphabet" someone else may not. It's one way that I filter for spam in email...I don't read Japanese, no Cryllic... emails in those "alphabets" go to the spam basket.

Missmusiquenonstop
Missmusiquenonstop

What? Google is the perfect name for a search engine... it has meaning and form and fun...

rob07601
rob07601

Google does have the advantage of being extremely easy to pronounce and also to spell correctly after hearing it. To be fair, I think I was using "search" dot com at the time. Just looking at "Cuil", I would have to guess at it and depending on how it's pronounced the spelling might not be so intuitive. Toatally agree on the lower case "i" nonsense, it's long past cute but I'm used to it. Just thinking, I don't own or use anything with a small "i" prefix.

AnsuGisalas
AnsuGisalas

the "iLive" :) Or the favorite of Big Brother fans (tch!), the sanitary utility with a built in webcam: the "iDump Live" :p

dennis.nakamura
dennis.nakamura

The name really means something very nice, like invincible. But the guy above is correct (Ansu Gisalas), in english, it really looks like MuteKey. Muteki is a nice name in the wrong place. I live in Brazil, so it's a really cool name over here.

MissDorkness
MissDorkness

The first time I got a press release from a company named TaTa Technologies, I thought it was a joke. Even now that I know who they are (global company in Engineering and PLM), I still snicker and cry 'Save the Ta-Ta's!' every time I get an email from them.

clay
clay

What kind of a stupid question is this? Let's see...we're speaking in English...and discussing products that are named in English...and sold to an English-speaking market. I'm gonna suggest he's talking about the *English* alphabet. Thank you for your pointless commentary.

seanferd
seanferd

Yeah, not the best name, maybe, but hardly atrocious. The search engine is a decent alternative, though, and the naming is following the pattern set by Google - not directly implying search at all in the product name. Like Mahalo, Clusty/Yippy - whatever they call it now, Ixquick, ODP, or even specialized engines like Wolfram. Because people, it is assumed I guess, like product names and not descriptions. In other news, I just figured out last month the Skydrive is named as it is because we are to associate "sky" with "the cloud". Which seems to me now to be one of the least stupid names MS has come up with. Then again, they can't seem to pick one name for a service and stick with it. Which reminds me: Bing. WTH is that about? :^0

RipVan
RipVan

How do you spell Google, anyway?? Every time I search for something, there is a different amount of "O's" in it!!!!

RW17
RW17

I forget the word but it was originally to represent an uncountable number of pieces of information... and then someone switched a few letters to make it Google. Maybe due to the ridiculous Pam Anderson T-shirt pattern! :-P Names of items don't have to really be liked, do they? I would never name a child Frank, or Giusseppe, or Alonzo, or Harold... but it's really irrelevant... as irrelevant and disappointing as this article...

IMDB
IMDB

I'm with you there. I always say that I'm anti-i

thebalancepro
thebalancepro

The Italian kitchen appliance manufacturer SMEG. "Smeg" means icky in a sort of body-fluid kind of a way, as popularised by TV cult space sitcom Red Dwarf.

allanrockwell
allanrockwell

In Montreal, near a downtown highway, they have a large building displaying their name. The problem is that in French Quebecer it means stupid or perhaps moron... So that's a few million of us mystified or laughing on highway 10.

wpopp
wpopp

BING = Becasue Its Not Google!

CFWhitman
CFWhitman

So Google was named for the number googol, and not Barney Google? Hey, it could have had something to do with Barney Google's googley eyes.

seanferd
seanferd

And googleplex is a misspelling of googolplex. And probably why Google has the "did you mean..." search result, assuming you had misspelt something. :p I wouldn't care much for it spelt the other way, either. It has never said "search engine" to me.

CharlieSpencer
CharlieSpencer

A number represented by a one with one hundred zeroes to its right, or ten raised to the one hundredth power. Not to be confused with a 'googolplex', or ten raised to the one googolth power.

Gyorgy Kenez
Gyorgy Kenez

I was an iPro with my iPaq from Compaq (and later from HP) until the iMac or whatever i* came out...