Not all error messages are helpful. Some are just plain weird!
Greg Shultz is a freelance Technical Writer. Previously, he has worked as Documentation Specialist in the software industry, a Technical Support Specialist in educational industry, and a Technical Journalist in the computer publishing industry.
I think that most of these so called error messages must have been written on the first of April..........Microsoft surely can't be serious?
One of my favourites, trying to shut down a misbehaving Windows ME, "You do not have the system resourses to carry out that operation"
These are some good ones. A couple months ago I was writing some VB code for Office 2003 and got a blank error message. It had ERROR in the title bar and the infamous RED "X" but had no eplanation or anything else. If I could post it I would, I took a screenshot of it.
Last week, I received this error message: No Printer Attached installed ______________________________ No Printer Attached Does this mean that I have an uninstalled printer attached or I should install a printer that is attached.. (duh...)
Thanks Greg for an informative, eye-opening, and very amusing post. 'a rupture in the space-time continuum' - classic.
The word occurred is mispelled in the Money error message (ocurred). i guess it never occurred to the MS engineers to use spell check.
With Windows engineers in mind, more than one Windows crock-up has brought back from the grave one of Stalin's dry quips: "For some people, four walls are three too many." Have a great day folks! And thanx for this lovely anthology!
My favorite is the "Error: The Operation Completed Successfully". Gee, that's not supposed to happen with Microsoft!!
I don't know what was more fun, looking through all of the error messages, or reading the funny comments listed right below them. Thanks, this was pretty darn funny!
Here is a flickr set of Mac Dialog Boxes. Many of which are generated by Adobe applications. http://www.flickr.com/photos/jasonology/sets/72157601866775550/
Unlike the prior windows OSes, XP/Vista should rarely BSoD on their own. The majority of the BSoDs are related to hardware failures, or at times, faulty software. And as for the non-responding Task Manager, it only happened in my overloaded 700MHz, 256 MB Ram PC.
I got this one from AVG anti-virus one time: Test cannot be started because it already does not exist. I think time travel is involved, and the guys over at AVG got a real kick out of it.
It was a good laugh! Tink :D [oh and yes, I'm REALLY really late in looking at this. Kept it in my emails til I got the time to check it out.]
While this is a really funny image gallery, I noticed two of the images were grabbed from my website: "Nothing to Do" and "This window is busy". (I know because the font and color scheme I customized on the computer those are from are the same.)
One magazine I sometimes read, I forget now which one, used to have a page of "This is broken". Which often was a stupid error message. "No printer found, press F1 to print this error message" is one of my 'favorites' (NOT!) The "This is broken" became a favorite around here, and I actually use the term in daily life sometimes. If you really want to see some 'helpful' error messages, try Linux! That's a language I can't even speak! (Like I can 'speak' Windows! Not! At least with DOS, I sort of understood what was going on) But Linux really baffles me sometimes. I love to 'MOUNT' something. I hate to 'UNMOUNT' it. Now, if only I could get it to l'go me bloomin' leg... (Now, don't the Brits just have THE most colorful cussing? Almost makes me wish I spoke English, too. (Old Movie: One man speaking to another: "Good GOD man, don't you know The Queen's English"? "Certainly, Go'vna. And so's the King!".) G'day, Mate! Junkman
I am forever baffled after reading a message advising me that Windows was unable to start a program because the the application failed to respond and a specific path is provided with the query; restart? A yes answer provides the insane : "Windows cannot locate the file, please provide the correct path"
Back in the old days, before I bought my first PC with Windows 386 OS I owned a Commodore Amiga. That machine would often display a red screen with the message: GURU MEDITATION REQUIRED. Those were the fun days when just turning on the computer was a learning experience.
haha, great messages...maybe I need to go back through my program and make my error messages a bit more interesting, and fague. I always hated the error messages on Windows ME. Just about everytime I booted up I got some unknown something caused some unknown error. Never knew how to fix it since I didn't know what was causing it.
From the Old DOS Days M$ DOS would sometimes throw up a vague Message that Device 6 Was Missing Please Install Device 6 and continue. The only semi serious answer I ever got for that one was that Device 6 was the CPU so I should fit a CPU and try to install DOS again. I just asked how a 486 could display anything without either a CPU or OS Installed? :D Never did get a suitable answer for that one. ;) Col
In the days of Windows 3.1, my mother once received: "kb interface error, press F1 to continue"...even more opaque than "no keyboard" error.
Back about 30 years ago, I got the following message when compiling a Cobol program on a mainframe: "Unspecified program error. If program error free, then compiler error". Presumably the ultimate catch-all for some lazy programmer who worked on the compiler.
I know I shouldn't be reading this stuff when I am tryng to learn at college, but I couldn't tear myself away! It's hilarious! Does anyone at Microsoft get paid to dream these gems up? :)
Using Access with the QODBC driver for QuickBooks I got the really helpful: 'There was a problem sending the command to the program'. Aw c'mon, give us a clue! An error message is supposed to give you some kind of idea where to start looking.
In the 1970's, I used a CDC 6600 mainframe computer, which, if one mistyped a code onto a punched card, and then tried to access information with the unfortunate card, would get this message: "Non-standard command is non-standard" Since all of my work was printed out on large continuous sheets from a dot-matrix hammer printer, what followed was either gibberish or 25 blank sheets of paper! (This was before the days of CRT's and other "high-tech" gear).
Many years ago, there was a computer magazine that had it's last page full of interesting things. One of them was called "Useless error messages" or something to that effect. The most interesting one I can remember was "This error does not exist".
I am not sure if the vista red screen is more serious than a blue screen, I do know that you can change the colour codes of those blue screens, back in the days on win98 I changed mine from blue with white writing to red with black writing.
No. The colour of the screen depends on the operating system. Red was reserved for the people who were beta-testing Windows Vista. Start cramming: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Screens_of_Death
[b]Something bad has happened your system will now close[/b] with a timer counting down to 0. Very helpful as I have no idea which of the 100 running processed caused this to be displayed. Col
It definitely is a surprise meeting someone I recognize on a site like TechRepublic. I'm guessing the author just did a Google search for error messages and grabbed a bunch of funny ones, but didn't credit any of the original sites.
We had a printer that occasionally reported the error message "Printer Feed Jam". We could never work out which opening to place the jam and what variety of jam it preferred.
The Red Screen is for a Fatal Error and the Blue Screen is for a More Fatal Error. Though to be perfectly honest I'm not sure what's more Fatal that Fatal. :D Col
Of course the classic printer error message from office space. "PC Load Letter" I always loved that one. This article was great, really made me laugh.