Sometimes the difference between life and death, victory and defeat, failing the Knights of Camelot or recovering the Holy Grail is knowing the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow. Well, provided you have the proper variable inputs (such as the difference between African and European swallows), you can now cross the Bridge of Death without resorting to taxonomic trickery thanks to the Unladen Swallow Airspeed Formula Mug. The answer the third of the Questions Three is now a mere math-problem away. After that, all you need worry about is the Black Beast of Auughh, but if you’ve got the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch, you’re home free. Math and violence: Is there any problem they can’t solve?