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friday yuk

By NZ_Justice ·
Is there some order or something to who creates these things?

Well I thought I would share these with the TR.

1. Men are like ........Laxatives ...... They irritate the **** out of you.

2. Men are like ........ Bananas ...... The older they get, the less firm they are.

3. Men are like ........ Weather ..... Nothing can be done to change them..

4. Men are like ........ Blenders ..... You need One, but you're not quite sure why.

5. Men are like ....... Chocolate Bars .... Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.

6. Men are like ....... Commercials ...... You can't believe a word they say.

7. Men are like ........ Department Stores ..... Their clothes are always 1/2 off.

8. Men are like ........ Government Bonds ..... They take soooooooo long to mature.

9. Men are like ....... Mascara ...... They usually run at the first sign of emotion.

10. Men are like ....... Popcorn . ..... They satisfy you, but only for a little while.

11. Men are like .......Snowstorms ............. You never know when they're coming,
how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.

12. Men are like ........ Lava Lamps ..... Fun to look at, but not very bright.

13. Men are like ........ Parking Spots....... All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.


Men strike back! ! ! ! ! !

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it.
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Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
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Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me.."
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How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
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What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what she's told.
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I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
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Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes
a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
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Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
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Women will never be equal to men until they can
walk down the street with a bald head and a beer
gut, and still think they are sexy.
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In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
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Didn't mean,

by rob mekel In reply to Let me ponder this awhile

to step on your toes. Sorry if I did.

Rob

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If you

by jdclyde In reply to Didn't mean,

feel the need to apologise, then you probably did do the toe stomp.

You would not believe how many posts I end up cancelling out instead of posting. You only get to see what gets past my internal filter! (there is something for people to wonder about....)

Other rule of thumb, never apologise for something your not sorry about, and your not sorry about anything that is repeatedly done.

I have to run along and be a good boy now... ;\

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Not so sure about all of your points

by JamesRL In reply to If you

There are times when its helpful to swallow your pride and apologise for something you don't feel sorry about.

I was privy to a phone message from one of our clients regarding a project I am working on. They were clearly upset about something, and I had my own managements backing and support on every step. My own management was not happy at receiving the call, and when we all sat down, offered an apology - not that we mistepped but perhaps something we may have done or not done lead to a misunderstanding.

I also had a similar sitaution at a previous job. I was responsible for Y2K at a billion dollar a year company and I wrote a memo that tended to portray some of the IT departments decisions in not the best light. I raised a red flag. Well the CIO was fit to be tied, and he went to my bosses boss (the CFO) and demanded an apology and a retraction. The CFO looked me in the eye and told me that I was right, had done the right thing, but for the sake of maintaining the relationship I should take one for the team and apologise. He worked with me on the "clarification" but it wasn't a retraction. I took my lumps. A month later that CIO was fired and I survived.

Sometimes you have to be the bigger person.

James

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Missed the second half of that

by jdclyde In reply to Not so sure about all of ...

about if you repeatedly do something, then you are showing the people that you are not sincere.

An insincere apology is often taken as an insult.

The point is, modify the behavior.

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What???

by M_a_r_k In reply to Are you sure,

Rob, did I misunderstand what you're saying in your post? I admit I usually have absolutely no clue what any of your posts mean so I may have misunderstood this one. If I did understand correctly, you're trying WAY too hard to get attention. Please explain what you meant. Thanks.

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Think you

by rob mekel In reply to What???

understood right. Needing to explain jokes means that they are missing the point as the should be easy to understand. And there for no good joke.

sipsip and i meant it well

Rob

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Meant it well?

by M_a_r_k In reply to Think you

Uh... my interpretation is that you were saying that stargazerr is the woman the joke is about. That's extremely disrespectful. I'm shocked you would try to make a joke like that.

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and

by rob mekel In reply to Meant it well?

I am ashamed of myself ,even trying to humiliate her like that.

What was I thinking , a nice lovely person like Stargazerr :)

But then again you can't say it wasn't an open door.

Rob

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Open door

by M_a_r_k In reply to and

Rob, the first half of your apology was well done. However, the open door comment... She relayed a joke. Telling a joke is not an open door to turn it back on the joke-teller. The world would be a boring place if everyone had that fear when telling a joke. I won't say anything else about this. Let's drop it. But please think before you type and don't try so hard to get attention.

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re: Open door

by rob mekel In reply to and

And y're right. Won't happen again.

Rob

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