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friday yuk

By NZ_Justice ·
Is there some order or something to who creates these things?

Well I thought I would share these with the TR.

1. Men are like ........Laxatives ...... They irritate the **** out of you.

2. Men are like ........ Bananas ...... The older they get, the less firm they are.

3. Men are like ........ Weather ..... Nothing can be done to change them..

4. Men are like ........ Blenders ..... You need One, but you're not quite sure why.

5. Men are like ....... Chocolate Bars .... Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.

6. Men are like ....... Commercials ...... You can't believe a word they say.

7. Men are like ........ Department Stores ..... Their clothes are always 1/2 off.

8. Men are like ........ Government Bonds ..... They take soooooooo long to mature.

9. Men are like ....... Mascara ...... They usually run at the first sign of emotion.

10. Men are like ....... Popcorn . ..... They satisfy you, but only for a little while.

11. Men are like .......Snowstorms ............. You never know when they're coming,
how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.

12. Men are like ........ Lava Lamps ..... Fun to look at, but not very bright.

13. Men are like ........ Parking Spots....... All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.


Men strike back! ! ! ! ! !

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it.
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Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
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Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me.."
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How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
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What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what she's told.
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I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
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Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes
a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
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Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
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Women will never be equal to men until they can
walk down the street with a bald head and a beer
gut, and still think they are sexy.
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In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
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57 total posts (Page 5 of 6)   Prev   03 | 04 | 05 | 06   Next
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Aww Mae <wags finger>

by stargazerr In reply to Pertaining to an original ...

Tell us the truth ... Are you trying to pull a Jaqui and say on the 25th that it was actually today??

]:)

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Nope

by maecuff In reply to Pertaining to an original ...

it's actually the 25th, and your post confused me. It gave me a headache. Please don't do that again, I can only take so much before I just snap. :)

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And I think we confused Starrrr

by M_a_r_k In reply to Pertaining to an original ...

about your birthday, Mae. Hey! That rhymes!

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yes you confused Starr

by stargazerr In reply to Pertaining to an original ...

Now I dont know if I have eaten the birthday cake or have to wait eagerly for the 25th ...

]:)

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Explaining a joke

by M_a_r_k In reply to Pertaining to an original ...

starrrr, Mae made a comment that somebody's post was off-topic. I replied to her that she should realize that that's a common thing. I asked her if she was born this morning, which is a smart-alecky way of asking how could she be so naive to think that posts do in fact remain on topic. Being born this morning implies that she hasn't been around long enough to figure stuff out yet. It's not a very common phrase. You may not have heard it in India. ?

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When I saw "Explaining a Joke"

by stargazerr In reply to Pertaining to an original ...

I knew that I had been an idiot ...

But look at the bright side .... "I still get cake"

]:)

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Not you Starr....

by JamesRL In reply to Pertaining to an original ...

If someone has to explain a joke, then it wasn't told very well.....

James

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Weren't being an idiot

by M_a_r_k In reply to Pertaining to an original ...

You just weren't familiar with the rarely used phrase. Actually, it wasn't a joke at all. It was more like just a smart-aleck one-liner retort to Mae.

And I disagree with you, JamesRL. Some jokes have meaning only to the joke-teller and the recipient. Inside jokes, for example. starr and I have had a few inside jokes here that nobody else had a clue what they were about.

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Nuts

by stargazerr In reply to Pertaining to an original ...

I agree with both of you ...

]:)

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M_a_r_k, inside jokes

by Old Guy In reply to Pertaining to an original ...

Man you guys sure do have some inside jokes and you don't share them very well. There have been some that kind of made me feel like Stargazerr does about not being able to get in to the special TR area. Only I didn't pout as cute as she can. :) (That's ok you can keep the jokes inside--we don't really want to know them anyway.) <man, those grapes are sour!>

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