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Friday Yuk

By Oz_Media ·
(Don't know wht I'm so damn excited about it's not like I actually DO anything afterall) :)

So without further adieu;

The Top 5 Rejected Barnum & Bailey Circus Acts

5. Ten Drunk Clowns and One Mighty Frightened Monkey!
4. Mrs. Irma Morgan and Doll-Baby, Her Amazing Trained Pekingese
3. The Royal Lipizzaner Cattle
2. Jim Bob and the All-Nude Barnyard Revue

And the number one Rejected Barnum & Bailey Circus Act....
1. Tom, the Man Who Burns to Death (today only)

Now go get have a drink, damn you all! MUWAHAHAHAHA ]:)

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Jaqui you are an evil, evil man almost as bad as Col.

by sleepin'dawg In reply to hey



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by HAL 9000 Moderator In reply to Jaqui you are an evil, ev ...

What did I do?

Col ]:)

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Col; the fact you of all people would ask that indicates...............

by sleepin'dawg In reply to Hey

A true deviousness found only amongst Australian IT consultants and Mercedes restorers. I mean dropping a car on yourself has to be the ultimate excuse to duck work. All your fog ducking has earned you the degree of Master Fog Ducker *** Laude.

Dawg ]:)

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Well if I really wanted to duck work

by HAL 9000 Moderator In reply to Col; the fact you of all ...

I would have found a far less painful way of doing it.

Hey I also have a 1982 900 SS Ducati so I'm not all bad after all it is very fast and I've never had it to full speed yet. But that was only because the race track didn't have a long enough straight.

I'm really nice truly I am. ]:)

But that bloody car incident was not only painful but I had to get back under it to finish off what I had started. But I had numerous people hovering around me to make sure that they could pull me out if it fell again. I never get under anything that requires jack stands without having someone close by those things are far too dangerous and I'm constantly told by the voices in my head that Heaven will not accept me and Hell is far too afraid that I'll take the place over so I'm totally unwanted and I'm kept alive just to save any inconvenience to those higher powers.

Col ]:)

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Jaqu now I'm really offended

by HAL 9000 Moderator In reply to hey

I come out as Tatter Tots {what ever they are but they don't look all that nice!} :)

I think it is time I start teaching you how to juggle a running chain saw with the safety's removed and a nice furry little kitten. If the chain saw don't get you or the cat the cat sure as HELL will!

Col ]:)

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I've seen that one before...

by Jessie In reply to PSYCHO TEST

And the team lead I had at that job actually DID answer the question correctly. The rest of us were all stumped. So, I called him a serial killer once, and then decided, I REALLY REALLY didn't want to **** him off!!!!

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When you called him a Serial Killer

by HAL 9000 Moderator In reply to I've seen that one before ...

Had you recently seen the Texas Chainsaw Massacre or something similar?

Or was the look he gave you enough to make you think it wasn't such a good idea? :)

Actually it has its benefits if the Boss is far too afraid of "Pissing You Off" you have an easy life and only do what you really want to do.

Col ]:)

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I came to a startling realization...

by Jessie In reply to When you called him a Ser ...

that in his "spare" time, my team lead was a rancher/farmer -- did LOTS of heavy lifting and had PLENTY of sharp implements lying around... I didn't want to come to work one day and get a pitchfork stuck in my eye. Eeek!!!

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That sounds like a good idea

by HAL 9000 Moderator In reply to I came to a startling rea ...

It would have helped him no end in controlling his staff as well wouldn't it? :)

I can see it now a new person comes to the team and wants to have a go at the team leader so all the rest of the team drag him/her kicking and screaming away to have a little talk to them on how to behave with this boss. You could always point to a stain on the floor and say that is what happened to the last person who made a complaint and we can not get the stain removed no matter how hard we try.

Of course you would have to embellish it all up a bit and say something like he cut them up into little pieces and then threw some into the industrial bin out the back some he flushed down the toilet and maybe he forgot some and they are still in the freezer so be careful what you pickup when you go there.

Col ]:)

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That'd have worked well...

by Jessie In reply to That sounds like a good i ...

As it was a LARGE pharmaceutical manufacturing campus with all kinds of VATS and maintenance hallways... a body could disappear in there and NEVER be found...

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