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Friday Yuk!

By Oz_Media ·
GOLFING PARTNERS-Between 6:30 and 6:45


Four guys who worked together always golfed as a group at 7:00 a.m. on Sunday. Unfortunately, one of them got transferred
out of town and they were talking about trying to fill out the foursome.

A woman standing near the tee said, "Hey, I like to golf, can I join the group?" They were hesitant, but said she could come once to try it and they could see what they thought.

They all agreed and she said, "Good, I'll be there at 6:30 or 6:45." She showed up right at 6:30, and wound up setting a course record with a 7-under par round. The guys went nuts and everyone in the clubhouse congratulated her.

Meanwhile, she was fun and pleasant the entire round. The guys happily invited her back the next week and she said, "Sure, I'll be here at 6:30 or 6:45."

Again, she showed up at 6:30 Sunday morning. Only this time, she played left-handed, and matched her 7-under par score of the previous week. By now the guys were totally amazed, and they asked her to join the group for keeps. They had a beer after their round, and one of the guys asked her, "How do you decide if you're going to golf right-handed or left-handed?"

She said, "That's easy. Before I leave for the golf course, I pull the covers off my husband, who sleeps in the nude.
If his member is pointing to the right, I golf right-handed; if it's pointed to the left, golf left-handed."

One of the guys asked, "What if it's pointed straight up?"

She said, "Then I'll be here at 6:45."


Have a great weekend everyone, for those that voted Bush (FU,) nah just kidding congratulations!

For those who voted Kerry, well four more years and you can try again. Enjoy your country for what it is in the meantime.

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You .........

by Oz_Media In reply to Politically incorrent ... ...

Yes you heard me you........!

Still........! And then some more.......!

What's with Ausatralians and thier lack of humour ? LOL

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Now you be a good little boy OZ

by HAL 9000 Moderator In reply to You .........

Or I'll have to e-mail TR with a complaint about the racist way you treat Aussies.

Now as penance for you I think 200 Hail Mary's and 4000 Our Fathers and instead of just robbing the poor box on leaving take the whole bloody thing!

Col

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OK so here is my feeble effort

by HAL 9000 Moderator In reply to Friday Yuk!

How to Clean Your Toilet
without Scrubbing....


1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.

2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.

3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids. You may need to stand on the lid.

4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.

5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "power-wash" and rinse".

6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.

7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.

8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.

9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.

Sincerely,
The Dog


Well it is much better with the pictures.

Col

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A couple of quickies (no double entendre, please)

by jardinier In reply to Friday Yuk!

What is the difference between George Bush and a zombie?

(deep thought ........ )

Aha ! Iv'e got it !
A zombie lives in Haiti.

Why do French people eat snails?

They don't like fast food !

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