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Friday Yuk

By rob mekel ·
Tags: Off Topic
As I'm going away right after this post I'll risk the chance to be poked at :^0

1. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up put it down.

2. Don't cut your hair. Ever.

3. Don't make us guess.

4. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

5. Sometimes, he's not thinking about you. Live with it.

6. He's never thinking about "The Relationship."

7. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different, it's just like every other cat.

8. Dogs are better than cats.

9. Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

10. Shopping is not everybody's idea of a good time.

11. Anything you wear is fine. Really.

12. You have enough clothes.

13. You have too many shoes.

14. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don't expect us to like it.

15. Your brother is an idiot.

16. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.

17. No, he doesn't know what day it is. He never will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.

18. Share the bathroom

19. Share the closet.

20. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers.

21. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

22. Nothing says 'I love you' like sex in the morning.

23. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.

24. Check your oil.

25. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.

26. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.

27. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

28. Yes, pissing standing up is more difficult than peeing from point blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes.

29. Yes, and No are perfectly acceptable answers.

30. Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.

31. If you don't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

32. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?

33. Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.

34. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done-not both.

35. Women wearing Wonder bras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about having their boobs stared at.

36. Don't make 50 rules when 36 will do.

Have a great weekend and ... week to come.
or did i spell come wrong ]:)

Rob

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61 total posts (Page 4 of 7)   Prev   02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06   Next
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So asssswipe

by langballse In reply to The Stuttering Cat

Are you claiming that your grandfather is irish , just like every american is?

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how old are you?

by heml0ck In reply to So asssswipe

twelve? be careful or your mommy will catch you using grown up words.

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Don't Feed the Trolls -- Wheres Palmetto

by w2ktechman In reply to how old are you?
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i wasn't feeding...

by heml0ck In reply to Don't Feed the Trolls -- ...

I was baiting

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My grandfather would turn over in his grave if you called him Irish.

by sleepin'dawg In reply to So asssswipe

That would have been an insult beyond belief but he did have one or two Irish females employed as maids and/or housekeepers. He thought it his duty to care for the retarded and indigent.

BTW did your mother ever find out who your father was??? Grandpa got around a fair bit; you never know.

While we're at it, I'm not American.

Dawg ]:)

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by dawgit In reply to My grandfather would turn ...

You mean 'QC' doesn't mean Quality Control? :^0 -d

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Dummer Esel :^0

by sleepin'dawg In reply to √

Didn't expect that one, did you???

Dawg ]:)

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Na so dumm ist dass auch mahl nicht

by rob mekel In reply to Dummer Esel :^0

"QC" is to the english more like "Queens Council" Big question for them will be when will it turn into "KC"

Rob

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KC and the Sunshine Band

by dawgit In reply to Na so dumm ist dass auch ...

oh those decadent 70's

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Is it true that a 7 course meal in Ireland is a sixpack and a potato???

by sleepin'dawg In reply to So asssswipe

I take it you're one of those who missed the Celtic Tiger boom of a few years ago. We thought we might have opened an office there but couldn't find enough qualified people and the ones we did find were a bunch of lazy drunks or bullshite artists. Anyone we could have sent there demanded huge increases because they considered it a hardship posting. It's funny but we didn't have that problem trying to send people anywhere else.

Dawg ]:)

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