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I've been fired twice

By carmen2003tg ·
I just read article posted about retailiation in the work place. I've been fired twice. The first time I never complained and was harassed constantly for fraternizing with an another employee even after their leaving the company for another job. My second job I was constantly harassed told I was too fat and subjected to sexual harassment, couldn't even conduct myself appropriately on the job. Picked on about even the slightest mistake that I make. Watched constantly and then after reporting an incident after a year of employment was repeatly called a "*****" in the office because I was not terminated for being reprimanded in a manner other employees deemed appropriate. I was humiliated on my first job by these people about vibrators and sex toys and then went to the second job to be humiliated about not having sex. I filed a complaint with EEOC and now I'm having trouble finding a lawyer in the state of FL to represent me because I was accused of sexual relations with an office worker, and after 16+ years in the industry, that I never did any work on my own. Adjust my luck my past AVP was my future Director of the company that I was hired from the second time. These idiots were trying to catch me being a ***** out in the streets by following me too. And now I'm on depression medication over a complete myth and lie from within that company. I got violent on the first job, and the second job, all I said was "God damnit" and some religious fanatic overheard it and whoa, no more job. This was following my previous reprimand, in which I conducted myself appropriately by not having any contact with the employee I was accused of threatening. She actually mentioned that I threatened her AND her whole team. She was the whole team, in her eyes. Someone I was suppose to see Jesus in all of that stuff at the workplace, so yes religious harassment too.

I may be just venting pretty strongly now

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i would have fired you too

by TechniquePhreak In reply to I've been fired twice

From everything I've read, that being - your words, I would have fired you, too!

You certainly don't come across as a profesisonal. Furthermore, getting violent on the job is certainly legitimate grounds for termination - regardless of why you may have gotten violent. I would hope that someone your age would know that there is never an excuse for getting violent in the workplace (or anywhere else, really).

You don't deny threatening the 'religious lady', just her team? Well, that is also grounds for termination.

Furthermore, Florida is an "at will" state. They don't need a reason to fire you. And this was not discrimation. This was brought on my your inability to control your responses to their accusations. It was brought on by your unprofessional behavior.

You're not being persecuted. Get over it.

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no religious lady in Florida. I didn't meet her until at church

by carmen2003tg In reply to i would have fired you to ...

I didn't get violent with a religious lady. I was the one called a "*****", not the religious lady. I was written up falling only an altercation with the women in Florida. Following that the results of that meeting did not coincide with the intended plan of letting me go then. These people were not even part of my group either. So there was no playing around with other team members.

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Job Shopping

by tmlpjj In reply to I've been fired twice

I had hard times as a computer programmer/analyst. Working intensely with ones mind puts one in a very vulnerable state.
I became a job Shopper (consultant, vendor, temporary worker or whatever). It was very lucrative. I made enough to keep me happy and usually worked about 7 months a year.

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Devil's Advocate

by jhilgeman2 In reply to I've been fired twice

I hear a lot of stories all the time about bogus harassment claims and how companies are "wacko" about it nowadays. I'm not about to say that there aren't really bad examples of wacko responses by companies.

- HOWEVER -

I think that these bad examples are usually the only ones being talked about (because the people are outraged at being screwed over by the policies), so it makes it SEEM like sexual harassment policies are a bad thing or always over-applied. More often than not, the REAL scenarios where sexual harassment happens are kept hush-hush. Women and men who are victims of it usually DON'T like to talk about it, since it is often embarassing or humiliating for them. Also, employers sometimes see them as troublemakers, even though it may not have been their fault, so they are less likely to hire these people if they talk about it. (There are other reasons, too, but these are common ones.)

So in the end, you have a few people scattered here and there that get outraged at being screwed over by these policies, and so they make a big statement about it. Mistakes do happen, and when they do, it really does suck, as Carmen pointed out. But don't be deceived into thinking that sexual harassment is just some ultra-radical feminist tools used by man-hating women or some ridiculous stereotype like that. They DO serve a purpose and protect people every day, even if you don't hear about it.

One more thing - you mentioned that some religious fanatic heard you say "God damnit" and got you fired. I'll be honest and say that that's probably not the real reason they fired you. Otherwise, you could easily sue them for wrongful termination since the company can't discriminate using religion, and thus cannot use religion in making company policies that cater to a specific religion. (If you were on the phone with a customer and were swearing at them, that would be different, since that deals with the quality of customer care, not religion)

The termination would probably have to deal with the threatening, but it's impossible for us to know what really happened without being there. Nothing personal, but EVERYONE is innocent in their own stories (I know I'm guilty of it) - it's really hard to be objective when you have something to lose. It's possible that this person was over-sensitive and mistakenly THOUGHT she was being threatened. Who knows? But just in case, I'd recommend not basing a view of religion (or any other important part of life) on the actions of a few bad apples.

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Thanks, I wasn't denying what I said. I didn't say it to a customer

by carmen2003tg In reply to Devil's Advocate

I sat down at my desk. Walked in from lunch, sat at my desk, and was working on a program. I was not directing my comment at this lady or customer, and I was not on the phone. I don't even deny management writing me up because another coworker felt threatened by me after she called me a "****". I did say something to her, and got written up for it too. Just me though.

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Internal Problem Going External

by kappanova01 In reply to Thanks, I wasn't denying ...

I think there have been some valid points made here, but I think that this is a "self image" problem here coupled with "low self-esteem". I have picked up in Carmen's numerous posts that she is referring to herself as unattractive in a subliminal way. We don't have a picture of you, but I think that in today's overly youth oriented environment, even in the work place, trying to look and be young is prevelant. No one would just walk up to you and call you a "****" without some cause. Were you trying to dress to fit in or dressing for success? In this PC society you are going to offend someone, somewhere, at sometime.
We all have choices in this life and we choose the situations that we put ourselves in. You state that you have 16 years in IT, then you state that you have 12+ years in IT, which ever it is, if you are a professional IT person with that number of years you should be in management by now if your performance is as stated.
At any rate there are no shortage of IT jobs, if the samething is happening to you on a new job it is not the job, but you need to talk a walk around yourself.

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point taken. I look young, anyway. I'm 43 and was believed to be 25

by carmen2003tg In reply to Internal Problem Going Ex ...

I have always dressed appropriately in the workplace. I don't have the body type to walk around in provacative clothing. My personality may have gotten me in trouble more than anything. Although being mixed, in my household, I wasn't brought up to be prejudice either. Management was never a professional goal of mine in that industry and there are plenty of non-management IT people. 12+ years is when this started.

Thanks for you input. I developed that self-esteem issue after being bullied. Never had it before. Friends prior to this situation could attest to that.

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Two to tango

by hlavsa In reply to I've been fired twice

I just wonder where is your part in this. There is always your part in anything and everything.

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Quit this discussion - it is adding to your trauma!

by mhalseystny In reply to I've been fired twice

You are not alone. Before harrassment rules, other causes were used unjustly. It hurts a LOT to be accused wrongly of harrassment, because it's an accusation of inhuman behavior.
The advice you've been give to let go of this is the only way out of your depression. Your writing shows you are not distanced enough from this.
Here is the way I "healed" myself from a similar situation:
Have faith - you have had a lot of years in your career where this did not happen, which proves that the majority are not out to get you. When you can, "own" the part you did play, and figure out new strategies for recognizing and dealing with similar "no win" situations.
None of this will happen until you admit that this traumatic event is not the norm, and that the majority of people in business want to help you and help themselves look good for hiring you.

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I never believed MY manager wanted to look crappy for hiring me.

by carmen2003tg In reply to Quit this discussion - it ...

The manager that hired me wasn't doing the complaining.

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