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Joker in trouble - Help!

By dgettere ·
I hope someone can help me out a bit here. I have a quick wit and a dry sense of humor. About a year ago I made a comment that was a joke, but some took seriously. Since that point, I believe that I am viewed as a "risk" and "not trustable." I have been treated as if I am a 3 year old, and my opinions are not valued even though I have been at my job for seven years, in my industry for ten, and have been in the IT industry for fourteen. I have tried to fix the problem, but there is a lot politics and LOTS of misinformation that is also involved. The biggest problem is that I am well liked, respected, and admired by all of the other employees, but there are three IT department employees that are the problem (one is my new boss.)
It?s been everything from not inviting me to important meetings to piling work on me to out and out intimidation. I don't know what to do, I feel like the more I do to improve my image, the more I am ignored.

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by csimpson In reply to

The last place I worked a guy went to HR, everything worked great until the big layoffs came a year later.

We were all retained for different periods of time until projects were completed (HelpDesk and/or Server Consolidations) This guy new more than anyone else about our entire network (HelpDesk) and everyone loved him, except the VP who he filled the racial slurs complaint against (Verified x3).

We all, I do mean all, enjoyed lengthy projects everyone stayed for months. He was walked the day we were notified of the layoffs because he was a danger to the systems even though he had no admin access.

Consider your tenure, what about not having a positive reference in the future after working for such an extended period of time.

Why endanger your family?s income because a mistreatment that may be real or imagined (Paranoia: something IT people never have:~).

Work is work not a social gathering, be pleasant but you don?t need to have friends at your job, when your job gets personal its likely that it?s no longer professional.

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I have the same problem with my present boss and colleagues in EDP

by Trifon.Atanassov In reply to Duuuude

I have the same problem with my present boss and colleagues in EDP Department...
At the moment all EDP staff is treating me like I am an 3 years old kid... In the beginind of "this all" all from department shows to me reluctance even if it was my birthday or name day. On my first celebration for my birthday - after a long hesitation it was the only one time celebration for seven years - all EDP spend money for one "green plush computer" - how green was my person... and one sweater.
I continue to bring chocolate bonbons every year for my name days and my birthdays.
Anyway I am an openminded person.

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Good Joe

by dlwpegleg In reply to

I didn't say "Good Lord" in the subject line because apparently that is not "politicaly correct".
You people do not even have all the facts of the "joke" and yet you seem to believe you have the answer to the problem. Was it a racial joke, homosexual joke, hayseed joke, blonde joke or just a humorous joke with nothing but the joke itself intended to entertain the audience. If the "joke" was in bad taste, then, of course, apoligize to the offended person. If not, then that is their problem and maybe they should consult with HR. ROFLMAO!!!!

Get a grip, people. Freedom of speech is not abolished, yet.

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Seek a mediator?

by neil In reply to I agree, seek a mediator

Why can't you do this yourself? You started this so put it right. You've offended people so talk to them and understand why, and then just maybe you won't do it again to them.

Mediators are a way of taking the immediate problem away a one-to-one confrontation. What a coward! Well, you started it so you go and talk very humbly to the three people you offended and explain to them your humour. They might just understand or they might just inform you that your sort of humour is not theirs'..... deal with it

Neil (UK)

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Mediator = coworkers feel need to defend themselves

by Nynviee_Almere In reply to Seek a mediator?

I agree. Only seek a mediator as a last resort (you know as your seaching for another job). Once you seek outside help you are escalating the problem and making a bigger deal about it. The people that you ofended will then feel the need to defend themselves and it will be a battle.
Go to your boss and confess, appologize, make repriations as nessicary and just don't do it again.
Seek an imediate end to the situation. Then just do your job to the best of ability. Don't make them feel that their opinions and reactions were no big deal, to them they were, but at the same time don't over do it. Since it has been a year since this happened it has gone on far to long and you need to face that it might just be too late to resolve the situation. So go forward with the idea that you want to fix the situation but have a backup plan brewing.


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Put in a notice

by ronald In reply to Bring it into the light

Write a letter and tell them you had it. tell them how wonderful it had been working there and tell them what great people they all our and how you would recomend them to anyone that needed there services. but that you can not take it any more and that you are going to go and drive a truck then enroll into a truck driving school kiss your wife good by and go drive a truck.
then and only then you will know what kind of a failure you really are.

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by Paymeister In reply to Put in a notice

Is this more dry humor?

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Have you really changed?

by buschman_007 In reply to Put in a notice

I've dealt with coworkers before that have, what I believe to be, an inappropriate humor. I'm not sure if you said one thing that was extremely offensive or it's a pattern of behavior. If it was one misfortunate comment then perhaps you can repair your tarnished image by just refraining from similar comments and keeping your nose to the grindstone or possibly even apoligizing to the offended party.

But from the sounds of this, it's your continued sense of humor that is getting in the way. It's great to be well liked, but being well respected will get you farther in life.

If you don't change your behavior then it doesn't matter how hard you work or where you work, you'll fall into the same trap again. Save your jokes for happy hour and lunches with the receptionist. When at work be professional!


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Just talk about it

by JayMiller25 In reply to Bring it into the light

I agree. Just sit down w/ them and talk about it. Be straightforward and honest, and I think they'll respect that. Ignoring the big pink elephant in the room is not going to make it go away. I'd say "Okay folks...sometime back I said THIS as a joke..and you guys took it the wrong way."

Although it may seem uncomfortable to sit down and have this talk, I think the benefits of it are truly worth it.

Good luck.

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Stop being a smart-***, it is insulting for many

by fjeanbart In reply to Just talk about it

As many said here, talk to your new boss one-on-one (the other two employees will follow the line). Whatever you'll do the after will depend on that important discussion and how you feel about it - if it cleared the way for you, or the opposite...

Another thing: for many, humor is a curtain for timidity. Try not to be a smart-*** whenever you talk to someone, especially in a professional work environment where people are NOT personally aquainted.

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