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June 25, 2007 at 7:09 am #2271472
Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
Lockedby big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
Check out this silly looking email I got today from another “recruiter”. Is this even a real position? They want a network admin with programming skills too? Perhaps they also want psychic abilities and the ability to forecast the stock market as well? What the heck is going on?
June 25, 2007
Dear ******:
Subject: Ref# KF 06251/System Administrator – Windows / Zenworks Deployment Expert/Madison Ave , NYC
We are pleased to bring to your kind attention the opening that you may wish to consider. Please find the details of the position below this message.
Should this position interest you, we would highly appreciate to hear back with a latest copy of your resume in Word format.
Feel free to pass this notification to any one else you know may be interested.
Thanks in advance for your time and looking forward to working with you.
Best regards,
Hari Kumar
Resource Specialist
DataSoft Inc
Ph: (678) 267-3728
(678) 777-2356 (Cell)
=====================POSITION DETAILS ===================Ref# KF06251
Title : System Administrator – Windows / Zenworks Deployment Expert
Location : Madison Ave , NYC – Local candidate only
Duration : 6 months +- going till the end of this year right now. Highly likely going into 2008.
Job Description
Analyzes and evaluates major system project requirements of considerable complexity requiring a thorough understanding of all parameters affecting and interfacing with the system. Reviews user requirements and provides direction in the identification of problem and potential resolution. Defines system objectives and prepares system design specifications to meet user and system requirements. Formulates logical statements of user requirements and develops solutions through application of systems and methods of engineering techniques. Reviews alternate approaches and selects appropriate methodology. Recommends corrections in technical applications and analysis. Applies advanced technical principles, theories, and concepts. Contributes to the development of new principles and concepts. Works under consultative direction toward predetermined long-range goals and objectives. Determines and pursues courses of action necessary to obtain desired results. Work checked through consultation and agreement with others rather than by formal review of superior. May provide work leadership for lower level employees. Considered expert in field. Excludes those with full supervisory responsibility.
Skill Set Requirements
Operating Systems:
Windows 2003 Advanced, Windows XP Professional, Web and Enterprise Server (including Cluster servers), Windows 2000 Advanced, Active Directory, NT, Terminal Server, VMWare, Windows 95/98/NT/2K/XP/Vista desktop, LinuxProtocols and Services:
Active Directory, DNS, DHCP, FTP, HTML, IIS, IMAP, LDAP, NNTP, POP3, RIS, SMTP, SNMP, TCP/IP, WINSSoftware and Utilities:
Windows XP, Windows Server, Active Directory, IBM Director, Novell, Blackberry Support, Veritas Backup Exec., ZENWorks 6.5 ? 7.0 (Software deployment Application), Ghost, Tivoli, MS Office, Citrix MetaFrame, Remote Access Support, Terminal Services, Nortel VPN, Wireless networking, McAfee, PatchlinkProgramming :
MS Visual Basic 6.0/ Visual Basic. NET, ASP.NET, ADO.NET, HTML, MS Visual J++ 6.0, C, C++, Crystal ReportHardware :
HP / Compaq Proliant DL and ML Series, IBM Servers, Dell Servers, IBM / DELL Laptops, Printers (IBM, HP), Scanner, NIC, Modem (Internal, External, PCMCIA), SCSI, RAID 0/1/5, Cable Cat 5, Cisco Routers, Switches, Hubs, WI-FI Network, Linksys Networks, Netgear Networks,D-Links Networks, SOHO, ISDN/ T1 Lines, DSLProficiency Requirements
Proficient in the Software packaging lifecycle, including installation and configuration, testing, customization via msi and mst modifications.
Advanced expertise with packaging utilities such as Wise Installer, Install Shield or Flexnet Admin Studio (Zenworks Edition)
Advanced knowledge of Windows 2k and XP Desktop imaging specifically in the area of creating a single image for multiple hardware types.
ZenWorks imaging, proficient in the delivery of desktop images via PXE and/or Boot CD
Experience with ZenWorks policies
Detailed experience with Complex customized deployments such as MS Office, Adobe, SAP client, Oracle client, Novell Client, Internet Explorer, Java, Zen Agent, Patchlink Agent and McAfee in a 5000 user+ enterprise environment.
Expert level experience with the Development and Deployment of ZenWorks Application Objects (NALs) following Best Practice Standards as recommended by Novell
Must have at least 2 – 4 years experience with ZenWorks version 6.5 or newer
ZEN Desktop Management integrations with Zen Server management, a huge plus
Experience with Windows Server builds 2k and 2k03.
Ability to meticulously QA products/process across multiple platforms and document
Excellent troubleshooting skills regarding all aspects of ZenWorks functionality on the Desktop
Ability to analyze failure/success of deployments and provide reportsCertifications
Windows 2003 Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer (MCSE)
Windows 2003 Microsoft Certified Systems Administrator (MCSA)
Microsoft Certified Professional (MCP)
MCSE: Windows 2000
MCSA: Windows 2000
Certified NetWare Engineer (CNE)Topic is locked -
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June 25, 2007 at 7:47 am #2590192
I presume
by shellbot · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
the salary is about 200K+ ??
WTF??
I thought i had seen some effed up specs..but that tkaes first place..I see a lot of same-ish specs in ireland recently. Its like they combine 3 positions to save the money and then can’t understand why no one has the experience and skills to fill the role.
Had a call this morning from an agent. Seemingly my cv is a perfect match for a position they’ve got. Its a hybrid DBA/SQL Dev/ .NET dev/ System Admin / General Support role
So right, thats 5 positions rolled into one. I beg to ask, how would you get any solid work done???
Too cheap to hire a couple staff… thats what i think
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June 25, 2007 at 9:04 am #2590107
I emailed the dipsh*t back asking about salary..still waiting for response
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I presume
I doubt they are even paying $100K for this. They’ll be lucky if they find some poor sucker on H1-B to do this kind of work, because nobody I know will put themselves into such a hellhole.
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June 28, 2007 at 6:24 am #2603566
I think I already work for…..
by michael.brooks2 · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I emailed the dipsh*t back asking about salary..still waiting for response
I think I already work for the dipsh*t that wrote that job discription. He will put out a post like that for a job that pays $35,000.
We have a lot of jobs here in AZ for $13.00 hr Help Desk. But require Advaced knowlege of Active Directory…..Network Administrator sh*t, lol. -
June 28, 2007 at 6:54 am #2603548
Helpdesk should know how to create user account using ADUC
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I think I already work for…..
but not how to perform an authoritative restore of AD using NTDSUTIL. That’s why there is so much turnover in helpdesk because the corporate dolts that hire helpdesk staff expect helpdesk to know as much as the 3rd level systems engineers. Reality dictates otherwise.
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June 28, 2007 at 9:09 am #2603454
Position Duties
by hlore · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Helpdesk should know how to create user account using ADUC
Is there a site where one could find a list of just what duties are appropriate for various positions?
When I think of Help Desk, I think of someone to answer questions like, “My mouse won’t move.” Or “Word has an error and won’t shut down.” I’m reticent to give a help desk position admin rights on the servers at all, even if that person is only supposed to unlock accounts. Is there a way to lock down just what an account can perform both on the server itself and in Active Directory?
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June 28, 2007 at 9:28 am #2603437
Delegation of rights was designed for this purpose.
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Position Duties
That’s what delegation of rights is for in AD. You can lock down the abilities of help desk to only a specific set of permissions without having to give them any admin rights. AD gets pretty granular with this stuff. I suggest you read up on delegation of rights on OUs’, sites, and domains…it’s pretty cool stuff.
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June 28, 2007 at 7:31 am #2603525
There’s a poster for this…
by techrepublic · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I emailed the dipsh*t back asking about salary..still waiting for response
Take a look what they are really looking for:
Discovery -
June 28, 2007 at 5:32 pm #2587713
And 3 days later, the idiot finally responds with this…it’s pathetic!
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I emailed the dipsh*t back asking about salary..still waiting for response
Thanks for your response. I feel the client is looking for an Administrator with a combination of skills. (Your cheap ass idiot of a client doesn’t have a friggin clue what they want!)
We could pay $35-40/hr. (Are you out of your god forsaken mind? Try more like $80/hr for all this crap!) Could you please get back with your expected compensation?
Thanks
Hari -
June 28, 2007 at 6:23 pm #2587703
I’m sorry? $35-$40/hr?
by jmgarvin · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to And 3 days later, the idiot finally responds with this…it’s pathetic!
They better pay overtime at time and a half. I just don’t get it….
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June 28, 2007 at 6:37 pm #2587695
Yes, and my response to him was “Are you kidding me? try at least $80/hr”
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I’m sorry? $35-$40/hr?
This position stinks of H1B nonsense.
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June 29, 2007 at 6:37 am #2580136
Oh CRAP! I nailed the salary offer!!!!
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to And 3 days later, the idiot finally responds with this…it’s pathetic!
FOR CRYIN OUT LOUD!!!!
I made more than that on a MS EXCEL project!
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August 11, 2007 at 9:05 pm #2618543
Do you really think that’s the cover story for just one H1-B slot?
by absolutely · about 16 years, 7 months ago
In reply to I emailed the dipsh*t back asking about salary..still waiting for response
There was another thread about a law firm that offered advice for getting H1-B permits by faking lack of qualified applicants, posting unrealistic want ads in obscure publications. I think the ad posted here is intended to be used for sending more than one job to an immigrant. I could find those qualifications in two or three realistic job postings: one programmer, one net admin and maybe a help desk tech, too.
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June 25, 2007 at 7:56 am #2590180
I’ve been seeing lots of these lately…
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
Also been seeing bizzare combo positions…
I actually went on an interview for a VB/Java position.
The folks P&Med back to my recruiter that I was not expert in both.
I told the recruiter that you’re not going to find someone who *IS* expert in both for what they were willing to pay.
Oh, and there are the various COBOL, VB, Java, Web jobs out there too **rolls eyes**
WTH is going on with these job reqs?
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June 25, 2007 at 8:05 am #2590173
I have been
by clark1 · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I’ve been seeing lots of these lately…
Seeing and getting calls for short term <6mos contracts. Are companies moving away from full time on site support and moving to contract support across the board??
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June 25, 2007 at 8:16 am #2590164
I think they don’t know WHAT they want
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I have been
They’ve also forgotten that it’s not 2003 any longer and IT people can actually find work.
What *is* happening is many companies are getting tired of agencies throwing bodies at them. Most contracts these days are hiring managers wanting to go the ‘try before you buy’ route.
The BEST practice is to go to company websites and get the job listings there.
I can tell you from firsthand experience (recently unemployed, now fully employed) that there is no shortage of fulltime positions. The companies are simply tired of being hosed by agencies.
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June 25, 2007 at 8:50 am #2590123
i wish
by shellbot · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I think they don’t know WHAT they want
companies woul ddo thier own hiring, frankly i am tired of dealing with agents who don’t know thier @ss form a hole in the ground.
I tell them i’ve 1 yr expience in .NET..all of a sudden they want me to interview for Development manager jobs..idiots..they don’t even read cv’s, they just keyword them and throw them out to ya.
Just once i woul dlike to talk to someone who can understand what i do, and what i am looking for.
I think companies are getting effed over by the agents cause they haven’t a clue..probably passing over great people because they can’t understand someones skills
*edit.i shoul dbe editing for the spelling, but i’m logging off anf going home 🙂
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June 25, 2007 at 8:07 am #2590170
ah yes
by shellbot · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I’ve been seeing lots of these lately…
i had to laugh at one i saw a while back..
these were designated among REQUIRED, along with 6 or 7 “other” desired skills:
required: min 6 years VB.net
required: min 6 years VB 6
required: min 6 years C++now..really..what C++ coder is going to dirty him/herself with VB???
Same way as I, being a VB person would not touch C++ with a 12 foot pole..-
June 25, 2007 at 8:17 am #2590163
I know both VB and C++
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to ah yes
but only because the C++ programmer quit at a previous employer and the code had to be maintained by someone… I was the choice.
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June 25, 2007 at 8:48 am #2590130
ya, but
by shellbot · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I know both VB and C++
it wouldn’t be common for someone to have 6 years development experience in both. maintenance ya..i can just about read C++ due to working with jscript a few years a go, most documentation was only in C++, so had to learn enough to understand and modify for jscript..
but no way could i do anything more with it! -
June 26, 2007 at 6:13 pm #2587399
Reading knowledge…
by mdhealy · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to ya, but
One thing I’ve noticed is that a limited amount of exposure to this or that language in the past can be very useful because it enables me to translate code I find on the Net into the languages I am using. But there’s a world of difference between translating FORTAN into Perl or Java versus actually writing FORTRAN — since I last wrote FORTRAN code about 19 years ago.
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June 28, 2007 at 9:13 am #2603452
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June 25, 2007 at 9:09 am #2590101
You think that’s bad? I was told by a prospective client
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I’ve been seeing lots of these lately…
that I wasn’t technical enough because they wanted an “expert” in Netapp aside from having “expert” Windows 2003 skills. I’ve done my share of Windows 2003 server, AD, and Netapp installs, and they’d be lucky to find MCSEs’ out there who even know what a Netapp Filer is. I guess they used that pathetic excuse to justify not wanting to pay my corporate rates.
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August 11, 2007 at 9:11 pm #2618541
clown car
by absolutely · about 16 years, 7 months ago
In reply to I’ve been seeing lots of these lately…
How many Indians can you fit into an American programmer’s salary? It’s illegal & dishonest, but considering the economic pressures in this business and the fact that some people are a**holes, I’m not very surprised.
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June 25, 2007 at 8:49 am #2590126
OK there are a couple of things wrong with this request
by hal 9000 · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
The most glaring obvious is that they are asking for an [b]Expert[/b] and I don’t know anyone who is silly enough to consider themselves that.
But the actual Short Term Job is nothing more than a Network Designer to I suppose Design and roll out a new Network in a 6 Month Period or maybe slightly longer as they say that the job may continue to 2008.
About right for a Medium Sized LAN to fix the majority of the built in problems. Seems that they are planning on integrating this project correctly as they seem to be saying that they will be replacing hardware and the new has to work with the old till the old is totally removed.
I notice that they want a complete M$ Desktop Environment so that’s a problem particularly when they listed Vista, but otherwise it’s a fairly good job description with a lousy header that is misleading.
Also for the required experience the money isn’t great as this is a short term Management position.
But if you want to stuff them completely send them a Word Document written in 2007 and see just how far they get. 😀
Way to poor pay and short term for my liking as this place seems to want to have their cake and eat it as well. I’m betting that for that lousy pay they will expect to own you as well and have you available 24/7 while you are there because of the [b]Big Salary.[/b]
From my memory of that City that sounds very much like a [b]Bread Line[/b] living status for what is effectively Part Time Work. OK if you are independently wealthy and are only looking at work as a Hobby not so great if you have to live on the pay though.
Col
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June 26, 2007 at 6:36 am #2588242
just that
by highlander718 · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to OK there are a couple of things wrong with this request
While evidently the requirements are way out of line, I would agree that they look for a sort of a Jack of all trades here, and expert at those trades too.
The problem is, as you mentioned, that this might work for a small to medium sized company, but the add is asking for experience in 5000+ user environements ..
They might’ve actually posted this one really looking for a team of 5 or more experts, that’s my only explanation.
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June 26, 2007 at 6:44 am #2588238
I seriously doubt they are looking for a team of people
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to just that
Lately, I’ve been seeing stupid buzzwords in these requirements like “Superstar” and “Guru”, just to name a few. That right there is indication that they are looking for a Cyborg that can multitask on 200 things a day, not a human being. 5 years from now, this position will still be circulating around the job boards because nobody in their right mind would subject themselves to such madness.
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June 26, 2007 at 6:58 am #2588218
We are the Borg We Will Add You To Our Collective Knowledge
by hal 9000 · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I seriously doubt they are looking for a team of people
Resistance is Futile. 😀
Col
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June 26, 2007 at 6:59 am #2589544
The last job I held….
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I seriously doubt they are looking for a team of people
had three more positions open for the full life of the project.
I am one of maybe five people on the East Coast that had the qualifications required.
Then they foolishly let me go….
The job req is open again, LOL! Too bad, so sad. My consulting rate for THEM is 1000/hr.
They only have one full-time employee left at the company that knows what I know.
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June 26, 2007 at 7:01 am #2589542
If they want you back, gouge them on the price . Screw em!
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to The last job I held….
Supply and demand economics 101. I love capitalism!
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June 26, 2007 at 7:18 am #2589529
Funny thing is, my boss WARNED them….
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to If they want you back, gouge them on the price . Screw em!
We were originally a group of 4, then they laid me off back in 2001, five months later they had to hire two people and reassign two others from another department to do my job.
My old boss faught and faught for years to get me back. I finally went back as a consultant in 2006, worked miracles, and hints were made at getting my old position back (during the lean times, I did everything from drive a cab to load packages for FedEx.).
When I went back, it was a team of 10. 3 fulltime, 7 consultants.
when the project ended, they let all of us go except for one consultant (not me!) one of the full-time folks quit.
NOW,
One of the remaining 2 fulltime folks is very ill (I won’t celebrate, because it’s a friend of mine) and the other is ready to quit. The consultant is going back to India at the end of the year. He is independantly wealthy and can work anywhere. He doesn’t need them half as much as they need him.
They are now SCREWED.
I’ll throw a line out to my old boss, because he was always there for me, but the rest of them…. well, you know what they say about payback…..
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June 28, 2007 at 3:56 pm #2587744
They let me go from my last job because
by dta5811 · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to The last job I held….
a new CEO came in and thought I should be able to develop in VB when I had only done network administration for the last 5 years. He figured that IT was IT. They hired a developer and he’s now the net admin too; I seriously doubt that the network is being managed correctly anymore.
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June 28, 2007 at 4:54 pm #2587722
Result of another d**khead MBA graduate becoming a CEO
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to They let me go from my last job because
These fools think that anyone who works with a PC is automatically a “programmer”. They have no concept of what IT is and no concept of the different technologies and areas within IT that one can specialize in. This prick of a CEO must have come from a one man shop operation where they had one poor sucker running around and doing 300 things in a day while paying him/her a salary less than most janitors make. Do what I did…take on a “F**k all of you, I will become a consultant and make more money consulting than by being a corporate slave” attitude. Don’t get mad, get even, and if they ever call you in the future because they need advice on how you did something, agree to come in as a contractor and bill them up the ass.
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June 28, 2007 at 6:24 pm #2587702
I’d rather get cash
by jmgarvin · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Result of another d**khead MBA graduate becoming a CEO
Turds tend to too pay for as much 😉
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June 29, 2007 at 6:40 am #2580135
YEP!!! Couldn’t be more right.
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Result of another d**khead MBA graduate becoming a CEO
IT is IT, right?
You can program, why can’t you configure the system, set up email, troubleshoot server problems, design our webpage, implement it and get me a cup of coffee while your at it?
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June 30, 2007 at 4:53 am #2579814
No you’ve got it wrong Richard
by hal 9000 · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Result of another d**khead MBA graduate becoming a CEO
You should grow the Coffee Plant Harvest the beans process them and then make the cup of coffee.
I’ve seen this process falling down ever since M$ introduced Windows but it got particularly bad after 95 hit the corporate desktops as then any idiot who could write a macro for Excel or whatever was no longer a Data Entry Person but a [b]Programmer[/b]
Many people say just how much further we have come but back in the Bad Old DOS Days the End Users had to know the software that they used and know how to work it fully. If they couldn’t write a Macro perform a Mail Merge or whatever they where not considered as competent Data Entry People and failed to get the better paying jobs. Although they may have been employed as a basic position with Education provided by the company to promote them to a level were they could eventually be considered as a Data Entry Person.
While things like M$ Office made life easier it also [b]Dumbed Down[/b] the end user base and the highly paid End User Staff were replaced by 2 – 4 know nothing staff who were paid peanuts to do the job that the one person was doing previously.
With the trade off in positions or classifications at least the idea soon sprang up that all IT was the same and if you could do one thing you could do it all. The end result is insecure systems and a very heavy reliance on the [b]Security Features of Windows.[/b] To the exclusion of all else. While Company CEO and Accountants still expect the Big Bucks they also at the same time seem to think that staff wages are a unnecessary expense and they cut back on the better qualified staff and replace then with know nothing people with a certificate or two thinking that they know it all after all if that didn’t have those pieces of paper they wouldn’t be in a position to be offered the job would they? 😀
I’ve walked into supposedly [b]Secure Areas[/b] only to find open and unlisted WiFi Access points and even if they actually integrate WiFi they never Secure it Properly. I’ve just spent 3 days in hospital and had my NB taken off me on the pretext that because it was WiFi capable I could [b]Hack[/b] their System and obtain patient medical data.
My response was if you have such an insecure network you deserve to be hacked and have the Law Suits that go along with it. God only knows that they deserve this but then just to rub salt into the wounds today before being discharged upon condition I was asked to fix a Mobile Doctors Data Entry Point running XP Home and run through a WiFi point with direct access to the medical records. The problem with the thing was that the good doctor had failed to enable the WiFi connection.
Unfortunately I have to go back there tomorrow and maybe admitted again if my Kidney Function hasn’t improved but I don’t feel at all happy after first hand experience of just how insecure the Medical D Base is.
The not so funny thing is that in the canteen area they have a Public WiFi access point and on that you can find several access points only 1 of which is the Public point and you can log into any of them. If you don’t get an Internet connection on one you keep moving on till you find the Internet Point that is made available for anyone to walk in and use. Strange thing is that provided you are not a patient in the place you are welcome to walk in with a NB and use it but if you are a patient having a NB in the wards is a [b]No No.[/b] Unless you are a member of staff. 😀
Col
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June 28, 2007 at 3:34 am #2603643
Is it a joke
by saravananla · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to OK there are a couple of things wrong with this request
I wonder they are joking.No one I beleive can be a expert on all these fields.Even to expert in more than one field, you will be bald by then…………
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June 28, 2007 at 6:03 am #2603576
HEY!!! … is THAT a joke?
by captbilly1eye · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Is it a joke
I was bald by the time I was 27… what did you mean by “..be bald by then”?
I don’t get the time reference and… am I to assume that going bald is the most negative thing you can think of in reference to getting old?…you couldn’t say… “you will be in a old folks home by then” or “you will be in a wheelchair by then”, eh?
Oh wait, I guess that would cause confusion with those that are handicapped. …apologies to my mobility-challenged brethren. sorry.Anyway…, [b]in India, is 30 – 40 years old considered to be over the hill?[/b] …’cause I know a lot of people that were bald by then. And I don’t see them as even Middle-Aged much less Old! Of course I am speaking about men. I don’t personally know any bald women (lucky beeotches). But I know it does happen. Bald women are scary.
[b]Baldness is not a sound indicator of age.[/b] Baldness is a condition caused by gender related genetic factors that can be accelerated by stress, diet and climactic conditions.
Remember… God made a lot of heads, and the ones he didn’t like, he covered with hair.
He also gave us each only so many hormones, and if you want to use yours up by growing hair, that’s fine with me.
I like to I think of my dome as a solar collector for a sex machine. [insert John Hiatt singing ‘Solar Sex Panel’♪♫]In a way, I wish you’re statement WAS accurate, in that, by now I would be an expert in all fields of programming, development and technical support. Hell. I’d be haulin’ down the big bucks!
Alas. That is not the case.
I have a few more years to go ’till then.In the future, select a different benchmark for discerning that which makes someone feel or look old.
— for those interested, F.C.K.U.M.A.N.* is now accepting new members.
*FCKUMAN = Follicly Challenged, Knowledgeable Underachieving Men of America Nonprofit
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June 28, 2007 at 6:29 am #2603564
Misunderstanding
by null.corey · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to HEY!!! … is THAT a joke?
I actually thought that he meant that you’d pull all your hair out by then, and wasn’t using it as an indicator of age.
For the record, I was bald at 30.
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June 28, 2007 at 6:44 am #2603558
In that case…
by captbilly1eye · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Misunderstanding
He should have used the word ‘hairless’ instead of ‘bald.
artificial, self-induced baldness is another matter all together…
😉
[I guess I should have edited and considered for the English-challenged.]
…besides… it was just a joke. …Are you sure that hair is not the only thing that went over your head? :^0
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June 28, 2007 at 9:22 pm #2587653
Hey dont be serious
by saravananla · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to HEY!!! … is THAT a joke?
I am sorry that if I hurt you .I will try to use diff words to benchmark it.thanks……a lot
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June 29, 2007 at 7:19 am #2580110
zooommm…. right over another head.
by captbilly1eye · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Hey dont be serious
It was all in fun. 😀
It was only a joke!
[methinks these guys are only playin’ with me… it can’t be they didn’t get it… sheesh] 😀
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June 30, 2007 at 5:07 am #2579812
Hey I take a Fence to that comment.
by hal 9000 · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to zooommm…. right over another head.
I’m turning 51 this year and have a full head of hair and a full face of hair. So I must know [b]Bugger All[/b] about this IT stuff. 😀
In one of the places where I worked hair over the color was a must a beard was preferred granted this wasn’t because of any company policy as such just the idea that their staff contracting Skin Cancer wasn’t good for business. Seems that if you wanted the Short Back & Sides look you had one of two choices either pay the local Army Barracks a visit and get a hair cut or leave the town as not one barber in the place would cut hair that short. Seems that since one was sued for not advising the customer of the possibilities of Skin Cancer in 30 years time no one is willing to risk their income. :^0
Col
Now is there anything else to add NO I don’t Think So except [b]Sarcasm Alert![/b] :p
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June 30, 2007 at 9:05 pm #2596695
Glad to hear…
by captbilly1eye · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Hey I take a Fence to that comment.
somebody got it. 🙂
Hey. HAL, I beat ya. Mine was on the 20th.
… not fair you still have hair.
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June 28, 2007 at 1:43 pm #2587789
Only a couple?!?!
by gailm · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to OK there are a couple of things wrong with this request
I get these emails daily. The first turn-off to me is glaring mistakes in language.
If you cannot write a complete sentence, or use words that actually MEAN something, then you are in no position to evaluate my skills.
I’m sure this sounds petty, but I am sooooooo tired of lazy writing. If you wish to post a job description, get it reviewed for proper grammar and spelling. To me, it is a very poor reflection of (1) your recruiting company, and/or (2) your customer.
I work for a company that posts these “hybrid” job descriptions – looking for 2 radically different skill sets in 1 person. And they don’t even bother to proof-read their darn listings… *sigh*
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June 25, 2007 at 8:57 am #2590117
They missed a couple
by charliespencer · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
Healing cripples, raising from the dead, walking on water, redeeming the souls of all mankind.
They’ve listed 15 years of technologies. Very few people are going to be “Experts” on that many technologies across that long a time span. If you’re good at the older ones, you probably aren’t good at the new ones. If you’re an expert on the newer stuff, you may have never even see the older requirements.
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June 25, 2007 at 9:02 am #2590109
If they were looking for Jesus himself, they should have said so
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to They missed a couple
But I doubt they’re going to find anyone to fill this pathetic excuse for a position…assuming it’s not bogus to begin with.
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June 25, 2007 at 9:21 am #2590091
Jesus applied, and turned down for being under-qualified.
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to If they were looking for Jesus himself, they should have said so
They want G_D himself.
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June 25, 2007 at 11:06 am #2589999
Of course they want the “Big G”
by charliespencer · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Jesus applied, and turned down for being under-qualified.
He’s the only one old enough to remember Windows 95 and external modems.
Cripes, why is “SOHO” on this list?
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June 25, 2007 at 11:09 am #2589998
They left off the “BBS Operator” and “Procomm 95” requirements
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Of course they want the “Big G”
oh wait…they also missed the part regarding expert knowledge in X.25 switched networks and ZModem protocols.
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June 25, 2007 at 3:14 pm #2588504
Hmm…
by jellimonsta · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to They left off the “BBS Operator” and “Procomm 95” requirements
I know a litle ZModem and X.25. 🙂
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June 26, 2007 at 6:18 pm #2587396
Not to mention Kermit, etc.
by mdhealy · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to They left off the “BBS Operator” and “Procomm 95” requirements
Doesn’t this position also require familiarity with Kermit and IBM Hollerith formats?
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June 25, 2007 at 4:02 pm #2588488
It’s a buzz word, you gotta have it on there
by jmgarvin · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Of course they want the “Big G”
They had CRM and I think BPM, so you might as well put in SOHO and other such nonsense.
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June 26, 2007 at 5:43 am #2588280
Knowledge of 200 baud modems required
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Of course they want the “Big G”
Punchcard skills highly desired as well.
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June 28, 2007 at 4:50 am #2603617
Oooooo!!!!!
by dr_zinj · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Knowledge of 200 baud modems required
I have card punch experience!
I may even remember how to build template drum cards for them.
I guess that dates me a bit.
ROTFLMAO!
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June 28, 2007 at 6:07 am #2603575
LOL, beware the punch-card pranksters….
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Oooooo!!!!!
You know, messing up the order… bending one in the middle of the stack… stealing a punch card….
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June 28, 2007 at 6:13 am #2603571
Richard, Dr. – Thanks for the Blast From da Past!
by captbilly1eye · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Oooooo!!!!!
This discussion has given me a lot of good laughs and your comments brought back some OLD laughs.
Ahhhhh… the good ol’ days. 🙂sabotage was such an easy game back then.
LMAO -
August 11, 2007 at 9:35 pm #2618537
Jesus interviewed, but refused the job.
by absolutely · about 16 years, 7 months ago
In reply to Jesus applied, and turned down for being under-qualified.
His words to the interviewer who offered him the job: “Maybe, based on my previous employment, you think I’m willing to be your miracle worker and martyr. Well, consider these two words: ‘retirement package’. There’s no way you’re offering me what I got from my most recent employer! Now, take this job, and shove it.”
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August 13, 2007 at 3:54 am #2618290
Conclusion to this thread
by joshfutch · about 16 years, 7 months ago
In reply to Jesus interviewed, but refused the job.
So what’s the conclusion for this administrator cum developer cum all over? lol
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August 14, 2007 at 9:26 pm #2619624
Maybe the job …
by absolutely · about 16 years, 7 months ago
In reply to Conclusion to this thread
is to develop a network administration app?
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July 1, 2007 at 6:57 pm #2604270
Not a problem
by freebird54 · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to They missed a couple
Reply back – suggesting the rates of pay as follows..
for skillset 1 – $50 /hr
for skillset 2 – $45 /hr
for skillset 3 – $60 /hrSo – to get me there = $155 /hr – guaranteed 1yr minimum… 🙂
BTW – am I an expert because I know what all of them are?? OF course, some I haven’t touched in 20 years….
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June 25, 2007 at 9:23 am #2590088
To all:
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
When I was in the depths of the IT slump (2002-2005) I found that companies would put out fictitous job reqs just to see what was out there, and THEN decide how many “real” positions to create.
If you see something like this out there, it may well be a fishing expedition.
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June 25, 2007 at 9:38 am #2590074
It works both ways
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to To all:
I too post an overly appetizing resume online to see how hot (or not) the IT market is. So far, I’m not liking what I’m seeing as IT is turning into a game where corporations are lowballing pay to the extreme. Oh well, if they wanna play, they’re gonna have to pay!
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June 25, 2007 at 10:00 am #2590057
Even *legitimate* recruiters are getting fed-up.
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to It works both ways
The headhunter who placed me in my current position was comiserating with me about the current unrealistic expectations of companies these days.
The IT job market has opened up, and the companies aren’t acknowledging that fact by raising salaries or coming in with more realistic job reqs, given the market.
That’s yet another reason they are clamouring for more H1B visas… the professionals are out there, just not for the peanuts they want to pay.
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June 25, 2007 at 10:13 am #2590040
Of course because it’s their commission on the line
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Even *legitimate* recruiters are getting fed-up.
It’s the bottom feeders who scour the online job boards doing their stupid keyword searches that are a waste of everyone’s time. I’ve only dealt with a few reputable recruiters in the last few years, but lately, they aren’t even worth a gram of my own piss.
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June 25, 2007 at 10:19 am #2590032
No more bottom-feeders for me..
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Of course because it’s their commission on the line
I learned my lesson well these past few years.
I’d love to post the names of the ones that aren’t worth the powder to blow them to hell, but I’m sure it would be a violation of TOS.
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June 25, 2007 at 10:23 am #2590026
Did I violate TOS by posting the recruiter’s name in the email?
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to No more bottom-feeders for me..
I thought it would only be appropriate to include the original message in all its stupidity and grandeur.
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June 25, 2007 at 11:11 am #2589996
If not, then I’m digging through my archives tonight….
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Did I violate TOS by posting the recruiter’s name in the email?
I’ve got some real DOOZIES to share…
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June 25, 2007 at 9:58 pm #2588396
Not in this case as you where asked to pass it on.
:0 by hal 9000 · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Did I violate TOS by posting the recruiter’s name in the email?
.
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June 26, 2007 at 6:00 am #2588270
Here’s one…. what a yutz!
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Did I violate TOS by posting the recruiter’s name in the email?
Hi,
We have an Urgent Opening at Raleigh, NC from one of our Direct Client. We are hiring on W2 contract basis, and consultant should be Green Card /US Citizen. Please send me your updated resume in MS Word format along with your Visa Status, Expected Salary , Contact Details and the best time to speak with you.
Please accept my apologies if this job is not of interest to you. If however you have a friend or colleague who might appreciate hearing about this job, please refer them our way!* The Consultant should be able to work on W2
* VISA sponsorship is not available for this job.Please find below the Job Description :
Title: Developer
Duration: 3+ month
Location: Raleigh, NCSkills required:
-Visual Studio .NET 2003/2005
-VB.NET
-SQL Server 2000
-Visual SourceSafe
-HTML
-Object Oriented Programming
-Windows 2000 or 2003 IIS 6.0
-System Analysis/Design
-Crystal Reports
-JavaScript UML/Use Case Web DevelopmentThanks and Regards
| Amit Trivedi |
Pyramid Consulting Inc. | Phone: 212-381-1120 ext 607 |
| amit.trivedi@pyramidconsultinginc.com |You can find me live on Yahoo/ Instant messenger
amit3582@yahoo.com -
June 26, 2007 at 6:26 am #2588248
Pyramid consulting? More like pyramid scheme consulting to me!
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Did I violate TOS by posting the recruiter’s name in the email?
I’ve gotten such crap from these morons as well. And for a 3 month project, I won’t waste time working on W2, especially if the contract is for out of state work, such as NC in this case. I’d do 1099 only…no exceptions!. They aren’t even offering benefits of any kind for a 3 month gig, so what’s the point of doing W2? Employment should last more than 3 months in my book. Anything shorter than that should be on a 1099 basis, so that I can write off the taxes on travel expenses and such. It’s better for them as well because they don’t have to waste time on figuring out my tax withholdings and such. Just pay me in gross and I’ll worry about the taxes myself.
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June 26, 2007 at 6:44 am #2588237
What do you want to bet that the pay rate is under $40./hr?
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Did I violate TOS by posting the recruiter’s name in the email?
Ya know, I think I’ll post a few more later…
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June 26, 2007 at 6:49 am #2588232
Oh, I know the pay rate is total horse manure. I get them all the time.
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Did I violate TOS by posting the recruiter’s name in the email?
I also get emailed positions for help desk and desktop support at this point after over 20 years in IT. Gone are the days of the dot com boom of the 1990s’, but if companies want skilled professionals, they had better be prepared to pay decent living wages, not peanuts suitable for H1-Bs’ who live 20 people to a single small apartment so they can pay the rent.
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June 26, 2007 at 11:08 am #2589338
another one.
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Did I violate TOS by posting the recruiter’s name in the email?
“We want someone worth 200K, but want to pay him less than half that (with no benefits…”
Hi
We have got the following position open. If interested, please revert with your updated word resume.
Microsoft Web Developer
Location: Quincy, MA
Duration: 12 months
Rate: $47/hr on W2 (No Expenses Paid)The consultant MUST have………
Microsoft VB Script.
Microsoft ASP 6.0.
Microsoft SQL Server.
Microsoft IIS and ActiveX web page controls.
C++ programming.
SQL.
Systems analysis with the ability to document.
Full lifecycle development (SDLC) process experience.Desired Skills………..
Proficient with Microsoft Office
Financial services experience (i.e., assets and wealth management, custody, fund accounting)Ram K Vutukuri
Pyramid Consulting Inc
Ph: 212-381-1120 x 218
Fax: 678-840-2108
Email: ram.v@pyramidconsultinginc.com
Website: http://www.pyramidconsultinginc.com
SEI’s CMMI Level 4 CERTIFIED CompanyNMSDC Regional Supplier of the Year 2004 (Class II)
Featured #63 of 100 Minority Companies by MBN100-2005
12th Fastest growing private company in Atlanta- (Atlanta Business Chronicle) -
June 26, 2007 at 1:37 pm #2589253
This just in…another “opportunity” that wants admin, scripting, DBA, etc
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Did I violate TOS by posting the recruiter’s name in the email?
I hope these H1B mills are reading our threads and seeing how stupid they look among the IT professionals.
This is in reference to your resume that I found on Careerbuilder regarding a job opportunity which might be of interest to you. Currently, I am looking for people who match the below description and I think you have the appropriate skills and experience for this job.
Title:Systems Administrator
Location:Stamford, CT
Duration:3 months
Job Description:Support of a global Windows Server 2003 and 2000 enterprise environment. Requires advanced scipting and web tools ability including ASP,ASP.Net, VB.Net, VBScript, WMI, ADSI and MS-SQL. Strong application server troubleshooting and performance optimization skills. Understanding Active Directory, AD policy controls and file system permissioning required. Working experieince with current versions of VMWare and Citrix as welll as HP DL * class servers, IBM blade servers and SAN storage desireable Active Directory, Install / Configuration Terminal Servers, Clusters, VMWare, Citrix. HP/Dell Hardware (Hands-on troubleshooting). OS install / troubleshooting.
Experience with large network environment Good team player, not afraid to take initiative. Great communication skills (verbal/written)
If you are interested in this opportunity, please respond back with an updated copy of your word-format resume. Please also advise me on the following details:
In addition to your resume please provide the following Information:
Your current Location (city and state) Contact number/Alternate number Are you willing to relocate, do you have any location restrictions, and do you have any preferred locations What is your current compensation What are your Primary Skills Legal Status – H1B Holder / US Citizen / Green Card Holder Date of availability.
What type of position are you looking for (tester, developer, etc.)
Best number and time to reach you
If you are currently available and interested in this opportunity, please call me ASAP at 412-894-8071. If you are not interested in this particular position, we do have many other opportunities available that I would be happy to review with you. Or if you are not available for this opportunity please refer your friends and let me know what date in the future when you may be available. Your resume will not be sent anywhere without your permission. I look forward to hearing back from you and working with you in the future.Sincerely,
Preeti Sharma
Technical Recruiter | MastechPhone: 412.894.8071 | Fax: 412.291.3059
Email: preeti.sharma@mastech.com | Website: http://www.mastech.com1000 Commerce Drive, Suite 500 | Pittsburgh,PA 15275
Compensation and other relevant details:
We are only looking for people willing to join us directly as W2 employees.
H1 visa transfers / GC sponsorship provided No C2C with 3rd parties
W2 salaried employees receive paid bench, benefits and may also be eligible for relocation assistance.
W2 hourly employees may be eligible for a tax free per diem.
About Mastech:Founded in 1986 and headquartered in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, Mastech is a $100+M subsidiary of the $270M global provider iGATE Corporation (NASDAQ: IGTE) that provides comprehensive consulting (I.T., F&A and Engineering) services for Fortune 1000 clients across North America. In each segment which Mastech serves, account management and resource delivery teams are custom paired for specific clients needs.
Over the past twenty years, Mastech has amassed more than 20,000 job placements at over 250 clients while averaging at least 5 years of experience with most customers. Mastech employs more than 1,000 people throughout the United States.
Mastech recognizes the importance of a warm and welcoming corporate culture for our employees to thrive and to achieve their professional and personal goals. In addition to having a diverse, open environment, Mastech focuses on creating and maintaining a professional environment that is both exciting and enjoyable to work within. Treating each individual with respect and professionalism, and welcoming feedback from our employees on how to continually improve and refine our corporate culture. For more information, visit http://www.mastech.com.
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June 25, 2007 at 1:00 pm #2589935
Another example of such stupidity. This is at UBS in NYC.
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
Why are all these stupid emails from recruiters with Indian names? Is this some kind of conspiracy?
Hello,
My name is Mihir Panchal. I am a Technical Recruiter with cyberThink. I found your resume while searching for System Administrator candidates for an immediate opening with one of our direct clients, a major financial client located at NewYork City,NY
Please find the specific job description below.
Kindly send me your updated resume in word format along with your exepcted salary if you are interested in below positionPosition Description
Duration : Full Time
Title : System Administrator
Details :
– Working knowledge of Active Directory operating environment.
– Knowledge of scripting languages: VBScript, Powershell, batch, Perl, REXX or similar
– Knowledge of SyncSort Backup Express, BackupExec, NTBackup, Netbackup or similar
– Knowledge of scheduling / process management tools such as Opalis or AutoSys or similar
– Knowledge of basic SQL Server 2000/2005, Sybase, Oracle
– Excellent communication skills.Urgent Opening
Client is Looking for only GC or US CitizenMIHIR PANCHAL
Technical Recruiter
cyberThink Inc1125 US Highway 22 West
Bridgewater, NJ 08807
Tel: (908) 429-8008 Ext 337
Email: mihir@cyberthink.com
website: http://www.cyberthink.com <http://www.cyberthink.com>
Fax: (908) 429-8004-
June 25, 2007 at 1:35 pm #2589914
Oh geez, I jnow these guys!!!
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Another example of such stupidity. This is at UBS in NYC.
scammers!
Many of these companies are outsourcing companies who are short on ‘homegrown talent’
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June 25, 2007 at 1:39 pm #2589912
Wipro is one of them. These morons are another.
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Oh geez, I jnow these guys!!!
I get one email every week from the dolts at Wipro and other H1-B mills. I pretty much told this fool to piss off because he’ll never find anyone to fill this position.
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June 26, 2007 at 6:58 am #2589546
Speak of the devil…here’s one I got today from the morons at Wipro
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Wipro is one of them. These morons are another.
Hi,
You are invited to a people-intensive, on-the-edge of technology powered environment.
The leaps and bounds in growth by an organization are a direct result of the people who are a part of the organization and who continue to contribute year after year.
Wipro being at the forefront of innovation and being the world’s 1st PCMM, CMM and CMMi Level 5 software Services Company, is also the largest independent R&D services provider in the world and is looking for talented professionals with suitable competencies.
We came across your profile on Monster.Com and found it of interest
To be a part of the immensely talented ‘Wiproite’ family we invite you to let us consider your profile.
The requirement for which we would be considering your profile is;
Requirement : ” Team Lead (Server and Desktop Support) ”
Location : New York, Carlsbad(CA),Monterey(CA) & Hightstown(NJ)
Skills:
a. Should be a Team Player and should be able to manage a team of max 5-10 members b. Expert on Wintel servers – Installing and trouble shooting Windows Server OS c. Good Knowledge of Proxy, DHCP, WINS, DNS, SMS and MS Active Directory, SAV ( all versions) and Patch management d. Install, Support and troubleshoot File and Print servers e. Expert on Desktop and Laptop Troubleshooting – Dell, IBM, Toshiba, HP, etc f. Excellent expertise in troubleshooting hardware and operating system related issues for Desktops and Laptops g. Backup, Restore and Tape Management planning h. Proficient on ITIL framework for desktop management like IMAC etc i. Excellent troubleshooting skills on Windows operating systems, desktop applications, LAN troubleshooting
you may mail a copy of your updated resume to manimegalai.krishnasamy@wipro.com
Please send me your updated resume to manimegalai.krishnasamy@wipro.com
Please enter the following details
Your Contact NO:
Present Salary per annum ( Amount/ NA/ Negotiable ) :
Expected Salary per annum ( Amount/ NA/ Negotiable ) :
Time Required to Join ( In Weeks ) :
Visa Status ( H1B/ GC/ EAD/ US Citizen/TN ) :
Convenient time for Tech. Interview :
Willing to Relocate within US ( If Wipro Provides Relocation Expenses ) — YES / NO :
Willing to Work as a full time permanent Employee of Wipro Technologies –YES / NO :
Mention the preferred location According to the Job Location Given : New York, Carlsbad(CA),Monterey(CA) & Hightstown(NJ)
If you have received this mail in error do let us know or if the requirement is not suitable to your skills, mail back so we may look at your profile for other requirements of interest to you.
Do act on this at the earliest.
Thanks and Regards
Mega Krishnan
Sourcing Lead
US Hiring Team
Wipro Technologies
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June 26, 2007 at 7:01 am #2589543
Any req for Salary reqs or H!B status = SCAMMERS!
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Speak of the devil…here’s one I got today from the morons at Wipro
without exception.
Oh, and I had ONE group that wanted me to sign a non-compete clause before even INTERVIEWING with a client.
I told them to pound sand.
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June 26, 2007 at 7:05 am #2589538
I don’t sign any of those stupid contracts. It’s not in my favor.
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Any req for Salary reqs or H!B status = SCAMMERS!
I’ll sign a non-disclosure agreement, which is fine, but I won’t sign any non-compete contracts that will prevent me from furthering my career. I’ve seen such contracts that prevent one from working for any company within an entire region or cluster of states for 5 years tops. One has to be pretty stupid to sign their career away by agreeing to this crap.
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June 26, 2007 at 7:21 am #2589527
I won’t sign those either.
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I don’t sign any of those stupid contracts. It’s not in my favor.
I’ve warned others about the companies like that. too.
“Excuse me? You expect me to sign something like that without even the PROSPECT of a job, much less an offer? EFFYOUVERYMUCH, but no thanks!”
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June 26, 2007 at 7:08 am #2589532
That sounds like IBM in the Old Days.
by hal 9000 · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Any req for Salary reqs or H!B status = SCAMMERS!
We do everything that you want and you just sign here to say that you will tell no one that we have contacted you. 😀
Glad that I never made the move to the US as I think I would have gone insane. 2 Years in Germany and then back to AU where I worked for IBM for a while was more than enough overseas work for this Little Black Duck. I didn’t mind the trips to the US for training and the like but working there full time wasn’t on my books though I was offered enough.
Col
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June 26, 2007 at 2:02 pm #2589245
Translated
by charliespencer · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Speak of the devil…here’s one I got today from the morons at Wipro
You are invited to a people-intensive,
We’re grossly understaffed.on-the-edge of technology powered environment.
We only have brownouts in the afternoon.The leaps and bounds
Jumping to conclusions, jumping on your @ss, etc.in growth by an organization are a direct result of the people who are a part of the organization and who continue to contribute year after year.
You know, like a cotton plantation.Wipro being at the forefront of innovation and being the world’s 1st PCMM, CMM and CMMi Level 5 software Services Company,
Boiler plate buzzwords lifted from someone else’s ComputerWorld ad.is also the largest independent R&D services provider in the world
And McDonald’s is the largest seller of hamburgersand is looking for talented professionals with suitable competencies.
So we can outsource the work outsourced to us.We came across your profile on Monster.Com and found it of interest
We’re working our way through Monster listings and you were next alphabetically.To be a part of the immensely talented
We’ve got a hell of a WOW team.‘Wiproite’ family we invite you to let us consider your profile.
Along with everyone else we found on Monster yesterday.The requirement for which we would be considering your profile is;
Requirement : ” Team Lead (Server and Desktop Support) ”
Skills:
a. Should be a Team Player
Long hours, low pay, no recognition, but we like it that way.and should be able to manage a team of max 5-10 members
If your project needs 10 members, expect to get 5.b. Expert on Wintel servers – Installing and trouble shooting Windows Server OS
NT 3.51c. Good Knowledge of Proxy, DHCP, WINS, DNS, SMS and MS Active Directory, SAV ( all versions) and Patch management
More boiler plate, this time lifted from an MCSE description.d. Install, Support and troubleshoot File and Print servers
You’ll be expected to load paper and refill toner cartridges.e. Expert on Desktop and Laptop Troubleshooting – Dell, IBM, Toshiba, HP, etc
IBM? Uh, you mean Lenovo, right?f. Excellent expertise in troubleshooting hardware and operating system related issues for Desktops and Laptops
This differs from the previous requirement, how?g. Backup, Restore and Tape Management planning
Use your personal car to take tapes to and from the off-site storage, on your time.h. Proficient on ITIL framework for desktop management like IMAC etc
We need somebody to take inventory. The last guy that had your job ratted us out to the Software Publishers Association.i. Excellent troubleshooting skills on Windows operating systems, desktop applications, LAN troubleshooting
This differs from requirements e and f, how?you may mail a copy of your updated resume to manimegalai.krishnasamy@wipro.com
Pakistani accent preferred.Please send me your updated resume to manimegalai.krishnasamy@wipro.com
I have to sent it twice? -
June 26, 2007 at 3:42 pm #2587472
This was hilarious. You should post it on the job boards.
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Translated
This made my day…LOL
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June 27, 2007 at 10:15 am #2596413
And this one is from a guy whose name I can pronounce
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Translated
Pay rate is nice, but good luck finding an admin who knows anything about VBScripting, ASP.NET, and is also a DBA.
Hi ********,
I have a client in Stamford, CT with a contract right to hire position for a Systems Administrator! (you’re assuming anyone wants to go from a high paid consultant to a low paid corporate slave of an employee)
The pay rate is up to $80/hr on a 1099 or C2C. It will be lower for a W2 (so why do W2 at all?). The duration until conversion is expected to be 3 months. The permanent salary range is expected to be from $100K – $125K.
I have provided the job requirements below. If you are a good match for the requirements for this position, please email me your hourly rate and your resume.
If you are not available or do not match these requirements, please feel free to forward this email to associates or friends that match the requirements.
I will contact those applicants whose background/experience most closely matches the job description below.
Sorry, no H1Bs! (awww..too bad because those are the types that would apply for this crap)
Thanks,
Bill Ruf
Senior Technical Recruiter
Resource Search Company
Office: 845-838-8947
Mobile: 914-213-8559
Website: http://www.resourcesearch.comJob Description/Requirements:
1. Support of a global Windows Server 2003 and 2000 enterprise environment.2. Requires advanced scripting and web tools ability including ASP, ASP.Net, VB.Net, VBScript, WMI, ADSI and MS-SQL.
3. Strong application server troubleshooting and performance optimization skills.
4. Understanding Active Directory, AD policy controls and file system permissioning required.
5. Working experience with current versions of VMWare and Citrix as well as HP DL * class servers, IBM blade servers and SAN storage desirable.
6. Active Directory, Install / Configuration Terminal Servers, Clusters, VMWare, Citrix. HP/Dell Hardware (Hands-on troubleshooting). OS install / troubleshooting.
7. Experience with large network environment
8. Good team player, not afraid to take initiative.
9. Great communication skills (verbal/written). (oh well, there goes the H1B qualification out the window)
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June 27, 2007 at 12:39 pm #2596354
My response and the recuiter’s shocking counter-response
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to And this one is from a guy whose name I can pronounce
His response:
Hi *****,
I strongly disagree with you! We are not like Wipro because we don’t take people from overseas and pay them half what they should be paid. (and paying $80/hr for what should be 3 separate positions is?) We are not a body shop! (could’ve fooled me) We help to find positions for people that are looking for one. (and what kind of positions are those? the ones that drive us into the ground with exhuberant responsibilities?)
That being said, I agree with you that it looks like a combining of more than one responsibility! (no sh*t Sherlock!) Unfortunately, we have to play it as the client calls it. (well tell your client to get real and create 3 positions instead of one!) Although ASP, ASP. NET and VB.NET may be a bit of a stretch (ya think? No…can’t be) , I have talked to Sys Admins that use VBScript and WMI for server automation and have a good understanding of ADSI. (Really, because I know many sysadmins and not one of them deal with ASP and very little with VBScripting, if at all, because that’s what developers do, not admins)
Also the client doesn’t always get what they want in their shopping list (really? I wonder why that is??). I try to get as close as possible but I often submit people who have 80% what they are looking for and they get interviews. (yeah, and I know a guy who’s been on one such bullcrap of an interview, only to be told he wasn’t technical enough for not knowing VBScript, SQL Administration, or ASP.Net so don’t waste anyone’s time nor insult their intelligence any further..thank you very much!)
Thanks,
Bill Ruf
Senior Technical Recruiter
Resource Search Company
Office: 845-838-8947
Mobile: 914-213-8559
Website: http://www.resourcesearch.comMy response:
Hi Bill,
Sorry, but I am not interested in work anywhere outside of Manhattan or Westchester County. Also, with all due respect, this position makes no sense because no admin I know of, including myself, does scripting in VB, ASP, nor manages SQL, which is a separate job for a DBA to begin with. They are combining what should be 3 different positions into one because they don’t want to spend the money to hire individually skilled IT pros to fill these roles. I’ve seen such nonsense from H1B mills like Wipro, but would have never expected it from you guys. You do realize this position won’t be filled anytime soon because of the unrealistic job requirements. You claim they don’t want H1B, but with these requirements, that’s all they’ll get unfortunately based on what I’m seeing and hearing from my colleagues and other professionals in the field.
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June 27, 2007 at 12:48 pm #2596350
ROFLMAOPMP!!!!!!
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to And this one is from a guy whose name I can pronounce
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH YOU’RE KILLIN ME!!!!!
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June 25, 2007 at 1:44 pm #2589909
You gotta love it when they ask you about your visa status
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Oh geez, I jnow these guys!!!
My answer is as follows:
Platinum member since 2001 with a $50,000 credit limit and 10,000 points racked up in frequent flyer miles. Next question!
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June 25, 2007 at 1:46 pm #2589904
ROFL!!!
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to You gotta love it when they ask you about your visa status
Yeah, I get hit with that one all the time.
Worse is, I have a VERY ethnic last name.
These H1B mills always try to get my to lie or exagerrate.
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June 25, 2007 at 3:58 pm #2588493
I have a very Asian sounding last name, even though I am not
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to ROFL!!!
and I always get emails about positions requiring fluency in Mandarin or Cantonese Chinese. The most Chinese I’ll ever speak is to read the Chinese names of dishes in English from the takeout menu. 🙂
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June 26, 2007 at 6:46 am #2588234
Mine is European, but the H1B mills…
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I have a very Asian sounding last name, even though I am not
don’t know the difference between a Northern European name and a central European name.
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June 26, 2007 at 6:51 am #2588227
Mine sounds a bit German depending on how you pronouce it
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Mine is European, but the H1B mills…
but they read it and think I am Chinese, even though I am not.
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June 26, 2007 at 4:02 pm #2587457
That helps me more than hinders me
by oz_media · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to You gotta love it when they ask you about your visa status
I am a British subject but live with under permanent status in Canada.
If my employer wants to send someone just about anywhere in the world (except the US of Alien’s)I can go with few working restrictions. Usually doesn’t matter how long I need to be in there, UK, Aus, India etc. there’s no limit for me and there’s no waiting for Visa’s etc. so it’s a better investment for the employer.
P.S. I do see that in the US it’s an issue of fence jumpers though.
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June 28, 2007 at 6:55 am #2603547
I this how they are creating false demand for H1B workers???
by rwise · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to You gotta love it when they ask you about your visa status
I read something recently about a law firm that was giving advice on how to hire H1B workers at lower salaries and avoiding hiring American workers. These types of ads would fit that scheme. HR would refuse to interview anyone without an H1B as “Underqualified” and then hire an H1B worker for less money.
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June 28, 2007 at 7:04 am #2603539
That seems to be the disturbing trend
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I this how they are creating false demand for H1B workers???
I have colleagues who were told during an interview that they are “not technical enough” because the company was really looking for a low paid H1B, but couldn’t explicitly spell it out without getting hit with an EEO lawsuit on the grounds of discrimination. The guy had over 20 years of experience in IT and they had the audacity to tell him that he was underqualified. He was qualified alright, but he wasn’t qualified to work for the peanuts they were offering.
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June 28, 2007 at 7:35 am #2603523
YEP!
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to That seems to be the disturbing trend
this BS is a DIRECT RESPONSE to the resurgance of the IT field in America.
There was no crisis of IT workers when we were all working at McDonalds at 8 bucks an hour. Only now that IT folks started going back to work at decent salaries did this ‘crisis’ appear.
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June 28, 2007 at 8:49 pm #2587663
I was told I didn’t have the experience for the job
by jmgarvin · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I this how they are creating false demand for H1B workers???
This was for a mid level sys admin in the Bay Area. They weren’t paying that well (REALLY good benefits though), but it is a name brand company (I think Fortune 500) and all they wanted a sys admin that could do some coding on the side.
I’ve got over ten years of IT experience, 5 years in the US Army and tons o’ education. What really irritates me is that during the interview (which I thought was going well), the HR people kept asking buzz word questions that really made no sense.
So, I think the problem is that HR doesn’t know what to hire and doesn’t want to pay, so they claim there is this huge shortage.
Well, as it turns out I landed a great job instructing (which I love), so it worked out, but I do know of at least a couple people that are being pushed into other fields because of this insanity.
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June 25, 2007 at 2:41 pm #2588516
At least
by tonythetiger · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
they put their expectations up front 🙂
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June 25, 2007 at 3:52 pm #2588496
Well, my expectations are to strike it rich and pay less taxes
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to At least
but reality dictates that it won’t be happening anytime soon. The same goes for these positions that won’t ever be filled.
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June 26, 2007 at 3:56 pm #2587460
First off
by oz_media · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
Tell the recruiter to P-off. Any recruiter who sends a “you will be interested” job description to you is a complete joke. Especially when they add, “if you know of anyone else who may be interested….”
This is recruiter that is completely incapable of recruiting, they are filling seats not finding a good fit.
Now, as for qualifications, first off the description is as much of a joke as the spammer claiming to be a professional recruiter (you don’t really waste time with these yahoos do you?!?!?) But…there are more and more multi-talented people who will fill such positions.
Some kids with no job finding skills will attend school, two weeks after graduating they feel they need another cert in order to find work, and so on. After many years of IT training, they have a bunch of outdated certs and no skill(s). They would be highly enthused by such an idiot sending them a job description and would waddle into line wiht all the others, hoping for that job to be handed out to them.But lastly, who in their right mind would want to work for such a company that obviously has no idea how to find a real recruiter and no idea what skillset to seek?
If I ever got such email myself, I would have contacted the recruiter and freaked out for the email in my inbox and blocked future mail from the fool.
Noce job description: “6 months +- going till the end of this year right now. Highly likely going into 2008.”
Really, THIS year???? RIGHT NOW??? WOW!!
Who wrote that shite?!?
Block it and find a job yourself, screw recruiters they haven’t a clue nor a care in finding YOU a good job. In fact if you fill a seat for a year and they have to find someone new next year, all the better for them. They are usually paid a percentage (8-24%) of your first year’s wages.
When starting out, they simply seek to fill a seat in order to pay the bills, they couldn’t care less for who or with who. A seasoned recruiter finds YOU what YOU want and matches it with a fit with a company that actually wants YOU.
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June 26, 2007 at 4:26 pm #2587446
You missed the point of this thread. I posted these for a good laugh
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to First off
here on TR. I don’t need a job because I am self employed and run circles around these recruiters and their H1B jokes of candidates.
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June 26, 2007 at 7:56 pm #2587369
I caught it, but…
by oz_media · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to You missed the point of this thread. I posted these for a good laugh
This forum has been chock full of idiots who are at the end of thier rope as they complain about having hoards of certs but revruiters never call them as they get lost in the stack.
It just gets SO tiring to see all of these people, who are trained to think outside the box, complaining that the most useless and common method is not working.
I JUST went back to work for an employer again on a contract basis, it’s been quite a while for me too, but it was someone that I targeted, cold called and sold my ideas to.
I WANTED to work for them, I went to them. As for recruiters, especially the fool who’s info you posted (I’ve had a few good ones sent to me too)they are a complete waste of time. I do know of a few professional agencies, but they also teach you to get your own career, at $4000.00+ they don’t throw out resumes on your behalf or beg people to apply. That’s just a farce, and yes I appreciated your posting in humour.
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June 28, 2007 at 1:27 am #2603667
Small Business
by dogknees · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
So, if my business only employs 15 people, I need to hire 5 more to look after my systems and write a bit of code?
Not every company has the means to employ an entire IT department.
For 12 years, I was systems manager, programmer, analyst, database manager, network consultant, installer and helpdesk for my employer.
What’s wrong with you people? Can’t learn more than one thing? Or just can’t be bothered?
I expect anyone calling themselves an IT professional would be able to cover any or all of these positions.
Now I don’t have a problem with you not covering the gamut of skills, just don’t call yourself a professional!
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June 28, 2007 at 6:50 am #2603552
And we can see why you are so pissed off at everyone
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Small Business
and your “attitude” is why us “professionals” don’t want to deal with companies looking for a one man show. Yes, we are professionals, and we are capable of learning, but there is only so much time in the day to do it, and many of us have other obligations (family is one of them) to consume all of our time cramming new information into our already saturated heads. Professionals are NOT omnipotent and we don’t know every technology under the sun because we all have our specific specialties. That’s reality…live with it or find someone else to stress over your peasly low paid job offer.
P.S. Don’t call yourself a network admin if all you know are bits and pieces of the technology.
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June 29, 2007 at 1:22 am #2587603
Some Are Able, Some Aren’t
by dogknees · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to And we can see why you are so pissed off at everyone
Some people ARE capable of covering the gamut of skills in the industry.
Yes, it means having a good fundamental education in computer science covering physics, math and engineering, yes it means learning new skills on a constant basis, yes, it means doing a lot on your own time to improve and maintain your skill set.
It seems pretty obvious that this is the sort of person who would not only be able to do the job advertised, but enjoy it for it’s variety.
While we now have other staff to do a lot of what I mentioned because the company has grown, I still get involved with Helpdesk support, infrastructure design, network and DB administration and travelling to remote offices for IT reviews as well as my main job of development. I wouldn’t do the job if I did development all the time. I’m sure I’m not the only one out here doing this sort of job and enjoying it.
>>That’s reality…live with it or find someone else to stress over your peasly low paid job offer.
Since when was I the one advertising the position?
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June 30, 2007 at 5:30 am #2579808
And just how much do you get paid?
by hal 9000 · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Some Are Able, Some Aren’t
Also do you call yourself a [b]Expert[/b] in all of the listed fields?
I’ve used every one of the technologies listed above and used to know some of them very well but as they are now obsolete I would hardly call myself capable of working in a position like that as the Head Honcho and the [b]Resident Expert![/b] Actually I’m sure that I’ve forgotten most of the finer points of NT as I no longer use it in a LAN Environment or at least a Secure LAN Environment. I have one piece of software that is old and doesn’t have a replacement and it runs on a NT LAN. But these are all small Site plants and the NT side of things is isolated from the main LAN Infrastructure.
By the same token I also support quite a few CAM Places and most of the CAM Hardware runs on DOS with a simple Peer to Peer 98 or NT 3 Network to drive the machinery. But none of this is connected to the main LAN or has Net Access and while I could probably secure down a situation like this if there is still software available to do the job that will run on this obsolete Technology for a modern Office I just can not see the point in introducing multiple security breaches into what should be a secure system.
As for the [b]Expert Designation[/b] the most I will ever say is that I have a lot of practice with this stuff but I’m certainly [b]No Expert![/b] I would never call myself this and I don’t accept this type of comment from others as you can never be to that level of confidence with everything that was available that you may very rarely touch. Why list NT and then 2003? The two are incompatible in the extreme and place the impression that the company involved either knows [b]Bugger All[/b] about their own hardware or are on a fishing expedition for low paid staff who know a little of all and are proficient in nothing. More to the point why only list M$ products? Seems that everyone thinks that everything runs on M$ products when the big Business only have that for the Desktop and the Internal LAN’s. All the Main Servers are something different and I didn’t see one mention of anything but M$ so what impression can you gather from that?
Col
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June 28, 2007 at 6:55 am #2603546
Fine, but don’t ask for a Jack of all trades.. MASTER of all.
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Small Business
I can handle c, c++, c#, vb4, vb5, vb6, vba, MS office macros, some minor DBA work, some UNIX shell work, HTML, XML, DTDs and a number of other things.
But don’t insult me by asking for the full use of my skills while wanting to pay me as a junior programmer.
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June 28, 2007 at 7:00 am #2603540
He’s barking up the wrong tree here with his comments
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Fine, but don’t ask for a Jack of all trades.. MASTER of all.
Just because they are a small business does not entitle them to special treatment or gross abusive of IT professionals by demanding that one have 20 different skills.
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June 28, 2007 at 7:15 am #2603532
I have about 20 skills
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to He’s barking up the wrong tree here with his comments
Master of 1, advanced in 3, skilled in 7 and entry level in 9.
Master of ALL, NEVER.
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June 28, 2007 at 1:48 pm #2587784
The difference is…
by wizard prang · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Small Business
…your job spec was realistic, while theirs were not.
They were asking for skillsets that are often mutually exclusive, or are rarely found in one body. If you are a master in web development, for instance, you are unlikely to be a master in Networking. Both are full-time jobs, and both require months, if not years, to master.
So, to answer your question, yes, we can learn more than one thing – and have – but not to the depth of experience that the “Keyword Monkeys” may require.
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June 28, 2007 at 8:17 am #2603499
HR is usually clueless about the position
by orka1998 · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
They have no idea who they are hiring, but they are the ones posting adds. This is going on for a very long time. It used to shock me that they expect programmers to know every single language that’s out there, but they have no idea that usually you specialize in only few. Until you show up there, usually you don’t even know what they need, but maybe on the second interview.
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June 28, 2007 at 8:27 am #2603491
And the IT recruiters aren’t helping either as they pass along this junk
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to HR is usually clueless about the position
instead of the recruiters telling the morons in HR to pull their collective heads out of their asses and get realistic about the job requirements. I’ve gotten into heated arguments in the past with recruiters and idiots in HR because I told them that they should be cleaning toilets and scrubbing floors instead of writing up job descriptions about things they know nothing about. It’s rare these days to find recruiters who even know what I’m talking about or understand more than a few buzzwords on a resume.
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June 29, 2007 at 2:22 am #2587589
You hit the nail on the head here
by bspell · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to And the IT recruiters aren’t helping either as they pass along this junk
I am a recruiter. I started in the business in 1996 and it just floors me seeing some of the stuff you guys get.
You are absolutely right in expecting that the group who took this order in the first place should be setting expectations with their client before any of this hits the street. The problem is you have a bunch of order takers out there and they work the low hanging fruit.
Trust me, we could have a hundred or more local clients if we wanted to but that’s not the way we work. Instead, we only take on clients where we DO NOT have to talk to HR until it comes time to generte an offer letter. Further, we won’t work with a client unless we can have a working business relationship and not a client/vendor typical relationship which means they actually value our opinion because we are the ones in the trenches every day.
On the one hand, I hate that these guys are out there because I constantly have to deal with guilt by association but on the other hand, they make it so easy to differentiate that the job is actually a little easier now than it was 10 years ago.
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June 29, 2007 at 6:43 am #2580132
Will you marry me?
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to You hit the nail on the head here
I think I’m in love….
LOL, seriously though.
I have dealt with recruiters like you and I do have a great deal of respect for folks like you.
I went to great lengths to find someone with your philosophy to great personal benefit.
Hopefully, companies will wise up and employ more agencies such as yours.
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June 29, 2007 at 7:11 am #2580117
For every good recruiter, there are 50 who are bottom feeders
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to You hit the nail on the head here
And the original post on this thread shows just that. The so called “Keyword Monkeys” are the lowest of the bottom feeders.
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June 28, 2007 at 8:30 am #2603488
Search Engine Madness
by michael · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
I have a friend who is a recruiter and I asked him about this. Many recruiters will throw out as many certifications and related terms on a posting as they can find to increase their hits in the search engines. According to this, anybody from high school student computer lab aides to Bill Gates would get hits on this description. It gets them loads of resumes and looks like their marketing and advertising is better than another company that only has one or two really qualified people apply. It makes weeding out the unqualified masses alot harder. Bad business practices. Like someone else mentioned, if you can find the original job descrtiption, that is the way to go.
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June 28, 2007 at 8:57 am #2603465
I call them the “Keyword monkeys” because that’s what they are
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Search Engine Madness
A trained chimp can run a keyword search by scouring the job boards all day long, but it takes a skilled recruiter to actually read the resumes and understand what’s in front of them. Simply because one mentions “Cisco, Linux, or VLAN” on a resume does not make them CCIEs’ or Linux admins. Just like I tell users to RTFM (Read the F*****G manual), I tell recruiters to RTFR (Read the F*****G resumes)!
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June 28, 2007 at 9:05 am #2603457
To add to your point….
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Search Engine Madness
I do know some recruiters that are getting these ludicrous reqs from companies.
The one I used *is* pushing back on them.
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June 28, 2007 at 9:31 am #2603436
Such recruiters are rare today because many just want to get paid
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to To add to your point….
and turn their agencies into “body shops” where they could care less if they placed a dog in a IT job so long as they get their commissions.
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June 28, 2007 at 9:40 am #2603430
Which is why I was so careful.
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Such recruiters are rare today because many just want to get paid
This headhunter took more than an hour to learn about me in person.
She submitted me to precisely TWO jobs.
One was a near-miss, the second was a direct hit and a PERFECT FIT.
She also has a reputation for excellance. She gets her comissions because companies that deal with her know she’s NOT a body-shop.
Because of that fact, when she says “this job req is unrealistic” they believe her.
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June 28, 2007 at 10:00 am #2603410
WOW!
by enriquehernz · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
I hope this company is ready to fork over tons of a cash for the right candidate. It looks like they are looking for a Jesus Christ of some sort. Able to do just about everything in the Technology field.
I’m more amazed at the duration of the job, it seems to not even be a permanent solution. Since when are Net Admins rentable? These companies lack an IT deparment or too cheap to keep one as permanent staff.
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June 28, 2007 at 10:02 am #2603409
Jesus applied, he was underqualified
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to WOW!
they want no less than the allmighty himself.
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June 28, 2007 at 10:05 am #2603406
What annoys me is that they assume a consultant wants to be hired fulltime
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to WOW!
For instance, if I were a consultant pulling in a rate of $80/hr, why in the flying f**k would I want to accept their job offer for a yearly salary that would equate to $40/hr? I’d rather be unemployed than hurt my own career because salary history will work against me in the future. Forget the benefits and all that corporate crap they throw in, because base salary is what pays the bills, not all their snazzy benefits and stupid perks, assuming I want their benefits, which are my choice to accept anyway. Yes, employees should expect to make less than hourly contractors, but not take such a lowball hit on salary. With that said, I’ll think I’ll stay a contractor because I’m not in this business for my health. This is a profession and this is my bread and butter…so pay up or shut the hell up.
My motto is “Sorry, but I don’t do freebies or favors at my expense”
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June 28, 2007 at 11:52 am #2587854
Ad I’d like to see: “Corporate pimp in IT seeking a flexible IT ho”
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to WOW!
Job requirements are as follows:
*Willing to long hours for low pay and take it up the rear as we see fit.
*Must have extensive experience in everything, even products not yet developed.
*Willing to fix our home PCs’, even though it’s outside of the scope of work.
*Must speak and write in English clearly without slurring speech or resorting to Ebonics.
*Only qualified IT hos will be considered, so please send us your resume for immediate consideration.
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June 28, 2007 at 12:05 pm #2587846
actual job Req I remember in 2001…
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Ad I’d like to see: “Corporate pimp in IT seeking a flexible IT ho”
“2+ years in .NET experience required”
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June 28, 2007 at 12:44 pm #2587818
Or 5+ years experience in Exchange 2003 back in 2003.
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to actual job Req I remember in 2001…
Maybe they were looking to hire Bill Gates himself?
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June 28, 2007 at 11:40 am #2587861
State job
by kyser soze · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
Looks like a job for the State of Florida. I live in the capital and subscribe to the tech ads, just for laughs. I estimate they would advertise this job at 40 to 70K, then pay no more than 10% over minimum.
Anyone who thinks I am exergerrating can search the tech jobs at MyFlorida.com for a sick laugh.-
June 28, 2007 at 11:53 am #2587853
I’m not surprised because the public sector is a joke
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to State job
I’ve worked for public sector before and it’s a miracle anything gets done there.
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June 28, 2007 at 12:06 pm #2587845
I’m another Public Sector refugee.
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I’m not surprised because the public sector is a joke
I swear if I had heard “You’re making us look bad” one more time I would have been mad enough to chew nails and spit screws.
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June 28, 2007 at 12:42 pm #2587820
Laziness and incompetence are the norm in public sector
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I’m another Public Sector refugee.
that’s one of the reasons I left them many years ago
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June 28, 2007 at 2:03 pm #2587779
I’m also a public sector slave right now
by rwmorrisonjr · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Laziness and incompetence are the norm in public sector
It pays the bills and got me off the road for a while, but doesn’t give me any ability to move forward in my career. And yes, its amazing that anything does get done because very little s accomplished and that the most frustrating part.
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June 29, 2007 at 10:28 am #2580031
True story
by davedowd68 · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to I’m not surprised because the public sector is a joke
When I first graduated college I worked for the state and had a friend that worked there for years. One day, after about six years working as a programmer, he got called into his manager?s office for a meeting unexpectedly. He called me before he went in, a bit freaked out worrying they found out he had only been working about 2 hours a day the whole time; or that they realized he used the state servers to run sports pools.
Well, he called me that night after the meeting laughing uncontrollably. He boss told him he was the best out of the 100+ programmers they had and was promoting him to team leader!
The State gets what it pays for.
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June 28, 2007 at 6:28 pm #2587700
High Comedy
by jmgarvin · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to State job
What kills me is that in the public sector they expect to hire good talent at 1/2 the going rate.
I also love how they expect you to work miracles with no budget…ya…lemme get on totally revamping the IT infrastructure on a budget of $0….brilliant.
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June 28, 2007 at 6:35 pm #2587696
If that’s not a problem, their red tape procurement process is
by big ole jack · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to High Comedy
By the time they finally get a bid on server and networking equipment, it’s over a year old and 3 generations behind everything else. Then, you’re expected to somehow load a new OS on a piece of crap that predates the OS by at least 2 versions (e.g. Windows Server 2003 on a crappy old Compaq Prosignia, not HP, running at 500Mhz with only 512MB RAM and 9.1GB drives for a departmental server serving over 2000 users). The public sector is infamous for running dinosaur hardware because unlike the private sector, they go through too much red tape in purchasing equipment.
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June 29, 2007 at 12:09 am #2587629
Ya, the 3 vendor rule really kills off any hope
by jmgarvin · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to If that’s not a problem, their red tape procurement process is
By the time you get 3 “good” quotes from different vendors, 6 months have already passed…by the time you get the funding, at least another 6…by the time you actually get the signed PO, another 6…then another month to actually get the equipment in….
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June 29, 2007 at 6:49 am #2580125
Yep!
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Ya, the 3 vendor rule really kills off any hope
and of course, some politico alters the specs so that the only one who can come in on the bid is his cousin’s shop….
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June 29, 2007 at 6:48 am #2580127
Our part of the world….
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to If that’s not a problem, their red tape procurement process is
was uninstalling windows 95 and deploying 3.1 on all of the PCs…
AND THIS WAS IN 1997!
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June 29, 2007 at 6:47 am #2580129
TRUE STORY
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to High Comedy
I worked as a sign designer/maker (graphics artist, minor programming required)
We were on such a tight budget that we re-used masking tape MULTIPLE times until it had no more tack.
Oh, and the only way we got more tape was from my partner stealing the occasional roll from his second job.
We sharpened grease-pencils down to nubs, then used exacto knives when the nubs didn’t fit in the sharpeners any longer.
I’ve got more stories, but that one takes the cake.
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June 28, 2007 at 2:58 pm #2587761
Hmmm, the only thing that person isn’t interested in is…
by dpcole7 · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
…the ability so write concise, coherent English.
Employers demand that from prospective employees. Surely the opposite has equal validity — and for the same reasons too.
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June 29, 2007 at 1:47 am #2587597
It’s actually…
by joshfutch · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
Good to be precise in job scopes. But I guess they wanted some one who can do the extraordinary. HR peeps are copy and paste experts so why bother lol
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June 29, 2007 at 7:31 am #2580103
Cheap Weasels
by tomaaa19 · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
It sounds to me like the organization posting this position either:
A> does not know what the want or need
B> Is unwilling to pay for an admin and a programmer.
C> Posted this unrealistic requirement so that when no one in their right mind takes the job they can throw up their hands and say ” We need to outsource to fill this job”.They are cheap weasels, possibly stupid and very likely devious.
Here is hoping that they get what they so richly deserve.
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June 29, 2007 at 1:32 pm #2579967
Here is the Organization’s Management Skill-Set (Includes IBM-Mainframes)
by john.decoville · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Cheap Weasels
Here is Hari Kumar’s management:
Harley Hines, President
Mr. Hines has over 21 years experience in Information Processing including over 20 years experience in design, analysis, implementation and maintenance of Securities Trading Systems. Over the years he has functioned as Project Planner/Strategist, Project Manager, Systems Analyst, and Systems Engineer. His most recent experience has been the development of TRAFIS and TradeBlazer? both Object-Oriented Client/Server commercial applications in support of Securities Trading. He also developed TopCop?, a Police Information Management System for law enforcement personnel.
Mr. Hines is also a key member of the design/implementation team of the Datasoft Trading System (DTS). DTS is a Mainframe based Broker/Dealer Fixed Income Trading System currently used by the Capital Markets Investment Banking Group at Citicorp. Mr. Hines? current focus is the development of other Client/Server and Electronic Commerce applications. Education: MS Computer Science, Columbia University (New York)
Technical Background: IBM-Mainframe: MVS, TSO, CICS, Cobol, PL/1, Fortran, Pascal, IDMS, IMS
PC/Workstation: Unix, HP-UX, WindowsNT, Oracle, HTML, JavaScript, “C/C++”, Smalltalk, Client/Server, Web ApplicationsCharles A. Monteiro, Project Lead/Technology Architect
Mr. Monteiro has over 14 years of experience in Information Processing. Most of that experience has concentrated in the development of full-life cycle mission critical enterprise object oriented systems. In particular he has developed dynamic fault tolerant distributed systems employing leading edge technologies such as object-oriented database systems, geographic information systems and internet service driven technologies. The applications developed have supported business domains such as customer relationship management, telemarketing, financial systems, custom graphics including pen based applications, multimedia and work flow management applications. These applications were developed for companies such as Florida Power & Light , KeySpan Energy, ADP/ICI and Fresher. Mr. Monteiro is in charge of leading the continuing modernization efforts of the company’s technical infrastructure as well as enhancements to Datasoft’s core financial products. Mr. Monteiro’s extra-curricular activities have included presentations at various technical conferences as well as organizing regular meetings on dynamic object-orientation issues and technologies in NYC. Education: BS Management Information Systems, Florida International University (Miami,Fl)
Technical Background: VisualWorks,Gemstone,Gemstone/J,SmalltalkMT,Oracle,PostgreSQL,GIS,VAST
Sunit,Envy,Java,VAJ,Junit,TogetherJ,Eclipse,Webphere,JSP,J2EE,XML,XSL
Tomcat,MQSeries,Windows,NT,Linux,AIX,Apache,Flash,DreamWeaver,DirectX
Homesite,HTML,Javascript,CSS,LDAP,StunnelDavid Zimmerman, Senior System Engineer
Mr. Zimmerman has over 20 years experience in Information Processing. He has functioned as Project Manager, Systems Analyst, and Senior Programmer. Mr. Zimmerman is a key member of the design/implementation team of the Datasoft Trading System. As a DTs Project Leader, he was responsible for the analysis, design and implementation of the real-time and batch Clearing House interfaces. These interfaces include the Fed Wire, PTC, DTC, DTC ID, MBSCC, and CEDEL. His most recent experience has been the programming of a Multi-Currency Accounting interface. As a programmer/analyst, David has been involved in all areas of enhancement and maintenance of DTs including Receive/Deliver processing, confirmations, accounting, stock record, and pricing feeds (JJ Kenney, IDSI etc). He also has extensive experience in retail and manufacturing (Point-Of-Sale, GL merchandise reporting). Education: BS Economics
Technical Background: IBM-Mainframe: MVS, TSO, CICS, COBOL, PL/1, IDMS
PC/Workstation: UNIX, Windows NT, “C/C++”, SmalltalkYoshiko Powell, Senior System Engineer
Ms. Powell has over 15 years experience in Information Processing. She has functioned as Project Manager, Systems Analyst, and Senior Programmer. Ms. Powell is a key member of the design/implementation team of the Datasoft Trading System. As a DTs Project Leader, she was responsible for the analysis, design and implementation of the TEFRA Withholding module, as well as all Domestic and Foreign Information Reporting to the IRS (1099, 1042-S) and to Revenue Canada (T5008). As a programmer/analyst Yoshiko has been involved in all areas of development, implementation, and maintenance of DTs She currently retains sole responsible for the interfaces to NSCC and GSCC, Cost- of- Carry reporting , and the Customer Safekeeping sub-system. Education: BS Computer Science, Economics
Technical Background: IBM-Mainframe: MVS, TSO, CICS, COBOL, IDMS
PC/Workstation: UNIX, Windows NT, HTML, JAVA, “C/C++”, Smalltalk, Paradox (ObjectPAL), AccessSherrylyn Hines, Senior System Engineer
Ms. Hines has over 15 years experience in Systems Design and Database Administration. She has functioned as Head of Technology for Back-Office Applications at a major Wall Street Brokerage Firm. Sherrylyn is a key member of the design and implementation team of both TRAFIS and TradeBlazer?. In addition, she has developed and implemented a major Hospital Billing and Accounting system for a Medical Consulting firm. Education: BS Mathematics, MBA
Technical Background: PC/Workstation: UNIX, HP-UX, Sequent, RS-2000, Windows NT, Oracle, Informix, Sybase, 4GL, HTML, JAVA, “C/C++”, Visual Basics, Client/Server, Web ApplicationsEdgar Vasquez, Manager
Mr. Vasquez has over 20 years experience in Fixed Income Operations and Systems Liaison. As a Back-Office Operations Manager at Citicorp, Edgar has managed units responsible for the clearance of over 13 Billion dollars in U.S. Government Repurchase (“Repo”) agreements per day. He has also managed a Fixed Income Data Entry unit responsible for the timely entry of over 3000 transactions per day. Edgar has also functioned in the capacity of Systems Analyst and Applications Specialist. His most recent experience has been the Documentation and Quality Assurance testing of the TRAFIS, TradeBlazer? and TopCop? applications. He is currently our client liaison responsible for User Training and Production Support for both the DTs and TRAFIS applications. Education: BA Liberal Arts
Technical Background: IBM-Mainframe: MVS, TSO
PC/Workstation: Paradox, Excel, FrameMaker -
June 30, 2007 at 7:15 pm #2596706
Notice the names…
by toms45 · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Cheap Weasels
Having read/scanned thru this lengthy thread and then looked at some of the items in my deleted email, I suddenly realized that NONE of the recruiters have an American name. The legit recruiter emails I received had American names signed. I wonder how many of these so called positions are for real? Is this a new form of spam?
Before I get flamed for being a bigot or whatever, I have nothing against anyone who’s trying to make an honest living. I simply noticed a common item on all of the job postings of this nature. Hope I haven’t offended the PC police!BTW, I’m 61 and remember punch card templates, Fortran, Kermit, etc. and I still have all my hair!
(Like Big Ole said, it’s a joke)-
July 2, 2007 at 7:06 am #2604135
Not all Indians are running scam/H1-B mills
by locrian_lyric · about 16 years, 9 months ago
In reply to Notice the names…
but most of the scam outfits are run by them.
It’s the old “All Buicks are GM, but not all GM cars are Buicks”
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August 15, 2007 at 10:31 am #2619411
Maybe the job is to develop an automated network administration app
by absolutely · about 16 years, 7 months ago
In reply to Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
😀
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August 12, 2010 at 7:28 am #2860714
Since when??
by hermanwalton · about 13 years, 7 months ago
In reply to Since when were network admins supposed to be developers too?
Since when Admins knew what the hell they were doing! When I began in this industry, we didn’t have the “luxury” of only beiing a network administrator, we had programming skills as well, and it amazes me how many people think they should get paid $80k-$100k for playing around with servers and have NO other usable skill!
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