Col......
only if given half the chance, my dear.....!!!
(and I'm ignoring ^2 - too young, to much to teach 'em, and I don't want to be accused of cradle snatching)
GG
Cradle Snatching?
Now there is a term that I haven't heard used in a very long while mainly because the last time I used it against She Who Must Be Obeyed she beat me nearly to death and unlike some people mainly female I'm not into pain & suffering. 
She's just under 6 months older than me and I can't help dropping that term occasionally along with Disobedient Wench. However I've learned never to threaten her with violence in a public place as it can be taken the wrong way, I still have memories of an 80+ year old Dear beating me up with her umbrella and the Police wanting me to lay charges of assault against her.
Anyway GG it's good to see that you have finally forgiven Neil for standing you up have you inflicted enough suffering or are you just too sick to care about punishing him? :)
Col ]:)
Doesn't anybody ever think about ME?
jd is the only one apparently who even cares that I've been MIA for so long (Oh whoa is me!) as he actually took the time out of his busy schedule to email me.
So, since tomorrow is my thirty-tooth burpday, I thought I'd come back and join in on a yuk. And since it's my children who've been keeping me away :) (I'm a mom, I can blame the kids if I want to) I thought the following funnies might tickle a few of ya'll.
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A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later, "Da-ad..." "What?" "I'm thirsty. Can you bring me a drink of water?" "No. You had your chance. Lights out." Five minutes later... "Da-aaad...." "What??" "I'm Thirsty!Can I have a drink of water?" "I told you NO! If you ask again I'll have to spank you!" Five minutes later......"DAAAA-AAAAD......" "WHAT!!" "When you come in to spank me...can you bring a drink of water?"
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One summer evening, during a violent thunderstorm, a mother was tucking a small boy into bed. As she was about to turn off the light he asked with a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?" The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. "I can't dear," she said " I have to sleep in Daddy;s room." A long silence was broken at last by his shaky little voice: "The big sissy."
********************
During the Sunday morning service all the children were invited to come forward. One little girl was wearing a particularly pretty dress, and as she sat down, the pastor leaned over and said "That is a very pretty dress. Is it your Easter dress?" The little girl replied, directly into the pastors clip-on microphone, "Yes, and my mommy says it's a ***** to iron."
********************
Finding one of her students making faces at the others on the playground, Mrs. Smith stopped quickly to reprove the child. Smiling sweetly, the teacher said, "Bobby, when I was a child, I was told tha if I made ugly faces, it would freeze and it would stay like that." Bobby looked up and replied, "Well, Mrs. Smith, you can't say you weren't warned."
Of course we all missed you!
We just thought that you were too busy for TR and would get back to us when you could.
Anyway, nice to see you! 
Haaaappy Burfday ...
Welcome Back ... Even though I have never talked to you before .. But Hi, I am stargazer, formerly know as us_geeks_rule ...
Hope you have a blast tommorow ...
]:)
Thats why .....
I wondered where I had seen those hands before ...
]:)
The Yuk is Up! 20/01
Had to pass this one on - it's right up my sense of humour street.....
(and yes, that's the CORRECT way to spell humour.....)
Have a wonderful Friday, and a good weekend, all!
Three little ducks go into a Bar ??????????
"Say, what's your name?" the bartender asked the first duck.
?Huey,? was the reply
"How's your day been, Huey?"
"Great - lovely day, had a ball, been in and out of
puddles all day. What else could a duck want?" said Huey.
"Oh. That's nice," said the bartender. He turned to the second duck, "Hi, and what's your name?"
"Dewey," came the answer from duck number two.
"So how's your day been, Dewey?" he asked.
Great - lovely day, I've had a ball too been in and out of puddles all day myself. What else could a duck want?"
The bartender turned to the third duck and said, "So, you must be Louie?"
"No," she said, batting her eyelashes.
"My name is Puddles."
GG
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