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What to do about a co-worker who thinks they are "it"

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by jck

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Recently, I had a situation in my office with asking a co-worker (who has worked here 15+ years, so would know more) about what to do with a situation where the restroom had been made a mess by someone.

Well upon telling them this, I was told that was not something they wanted to hear and it was gross, even though I used no vivid imagery or descriptive terms. Very clean, generic, plain, sanitary terminology...as not to offend, of course.

Now as bad as I felt, I began to feel irked. Why, you ask?

Well, this was a person who no more than 2 months after I got here was talking about having been a wild child, boldly called people (of fame/notariety) insensitive, bigoted, derogatory terms, used vulgar language, and had been part of a story of viewing (laughingly according to others) pictures of...let's just say...something that was left in the facilities at one time in the past.

So, this person is no "Virgin Mary" when it comes to having to tolerate things, let alone my indirect, very cleansed reference to someone's inability to aim properly.

At this point (since I have other suspicions about other things that I think this person has done in regards to me), I am worried that this person might see this as a leverage tool to use to get me in a difficult situation and try to use it to get me in trouble for "insensitivity" or something politically correct.

What would you do if put in this situation?

Would you have told them "Oh deal with it..." or been apologetic like me?

11 replies

by theprofessordan

My first thought is to not worry about it. If you work for a company where you have to worry about getting fired because of these kind of things then you probably aren't working for a very good company. More than likely, if you leave this alone, it will blow over. I have seen similar instances as this. Normally they get blown out of proportion and you look back a realize that pushing the issue is a mistake. Haven't sitcoms taught us anything?

by menace65

just leave an anonymous note which reads, "If you sprinkle when you tinkle, please be neat and wipe the seat." Or use the other stall. :) Coworker relations are comical at best, deadly at worst, so the avoidance of conflict is the best defense.

by jck

I can't use the pimp hand here. If I did, I'd be put in jail.

Being big means you gotta do twice as much to avoid a fight or you're considered "negligent" or "aggressive".

by av .

Then, move on as quickly as possible. I think you should make a point of apologizing to him so he can't say you didn't try. Cover yourself.

AV

etu

by jck

That's why I apologized and went in my office and didn't say anything else.

I figured it was better than me bringing up a conversation some of them had a couple times about something similar.

Hope I can just get a resolution, find a better job elsewhere, and move on from here.

by av .

Change the subject. You apologized, its time to move on to something new.

AV

by jck

There is, but they tend to want to "avoid situations" which means...they would have tried to push it under the rug.

Fact of the matter is, I could long ago have filed half a dozen complaints with HR about the vulgar language, topics of discussion sometimes involving sexual inferences, etc., which occur here.

But, I try to be laid back and not take things so seriously. But when a co-worker (who has used vulgar, offensive, bigoted language out loud on several occasions) begins to judge me for benignly putting that someone peed in the floor and I want to know how to get it cleaned up...just bothers me.

To be honest, I've had almost enough. I'm looking to even move from the state where I live. The situation here is not good, and the environment is one-sided toward the clique that exists amongst those who were here at the department's inception vs. those who came in later.

I'm here to do my job and get along well with people, not to be part of the social club and play cowboy politics.

by nexs

By all means, if you're not happy in your job, find a new one. But if it's not worth the trouble, hold it out for a little bit. It might miraculously come good, but if you're sick of it, you're sick of it.

But if you get keen on cowboy politics, don't forget the revolvers and practice your quickdraw.

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