personally, I would opt for Windows 2003 Small Business Server Premium Edition [includes 2003 Server, Exchange 2003 Server, ISA 2003 Server]. Included in the mix would be Symantec's Corporate Antivirus for Small Business with Exchange. The Small Business 2003 Server is a "all in one box" program with wizards that will walk you through the entire process of setup and configuration. If that's not an option, Microsoft Press Online http://www.microsoft.com/mspress/default.asp
is a good place to get books. I suggest you get their training book on Exchange for the core course MCSE exam.
As far as tools needed, Exchange Server 2003 has the tools on the CD e.g. installing the Exchange connector tool. After installation, download and install all service packs and hotfixes [I think there's about 8 hotfixes todate].
Setup of Exchange depends upon what type of mail service you plan to run. SMTP,POP3,X.400, etc and whether you want your own email address [to match a domain name you have] or use your existing ISP email addresses and ISP service. Further, if using your own email addresses, how DNS will be implemented [your own DNS or a 3rd party DNS service].
Running your own mail server can be iritating as spam is a never ending problem. Outlook coupled with Exchange has some good spam filtering software.
