Although I am pretty early on it. It is of course still Positive Thursday for me after all…
Here is something to get you started. Scratch and Sniff web pages
http://www.slabearkazad.com/sniff/#click
Ok, now for a serious redneck joke
Dearest Redneck Son
I’m writing this slow because I know you can’t read fast. We don’t live where we did when you left home Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen within 20 miles of home so we moved I won’t be able to send you the address because the last West Virginia family that lived here took the house numbers when they moved so they wouldn’t have to change their address.
This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine I’m not sure about it though. I put a load of clothes in it and pulled the chain. We haven’t seen them since.
The weather is nice here it only rained twice last week: the first time for 3 days and the second time for 4 days.
About that coat you wanted me to send: your Uncle Billy Bob said it would be too heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on so we cut them off and put them in the pockets.
Bubba locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were really worried because it took him two hours to get me and your father out.
Your sister had a baby this morning, but I haven’t found out what it is yet so I don’t know if you’re an aunt or an uncle. The baby looks just like your brother.
Uncle Bobby Ray fell into a whiskey vat last week. Some men tried to pull him out but he fought them off and drowned. We had him cremated, he burned for three days.
Three of your friends went off the bridge in a pick-up truck. Butch was driving, he rolled down the window and swam to safety. Your other two friends were in the back. They drowned because they couldn’t get the tailgate down.
There isn’t much more news at this time. Nothing much out of the ordinary has happened.
Your favorite Aunt,
Mom.