You global warming people are unbelievable. You asked for it, now hold onto your wallets because they’re gonna’ get it. It might be “voluntary” right now, but you just wait until tomorrow.
Tomorrow, tomorrow,
They’ll get you tomorrow
And no one’s to blame but you.
Today it’s voluntary; tomorrow it’s TAXES and SURCHARGES!
http://www.carbonneutral.com/pages/carbontrading.asp
http://www.carbonneutral.com.au/
http://www.ideum.com/climate/
http://www.nativeenergy.com/
http://www.ifpeople.net/sustainability/carbon/view
http://www.chicagoclimatex.com/
And even Al [i]Global Warming[/i] Gore owns interest in one of these carbon trading schemes:
http://www.opinionjournal.com/diary/?id=110009804
Al Gore, the “[i]profit[/i]” of doom!
I’m gonna’ get the preverbal last laugh when these frauds are eventually exposed — and they will, eventually, be exposed. You’re gonna’ ask yourself how you could have been SO FOOLISH believing this crock of crap. I never thought there would be so many dupes in the would, but I guess I shouldn’t be surprised.
In the meantime, perhaps I’ll start my own carbon neutral company. Yea, that’s the ticket.
For only $1.00 a day, folks, an insignificant $365 a year, I’ll plant trees all over the place, and then you can go on with your life absolutely guilt-free. I’ll call it the Maxwell Appleseed Company, and I’ll travel all over the world planting trees on YOUR behalf. (I’ll plant some extra trees for myself, of course, to offset my own carbon foot print.) Don’t worry about your carbon foot print. Hire MY COMPANY to not only worry for you, but to actually offset it.
You don’t know how to calculate your own carbon foot print? No problem, I’ll calculate it for you. Think about it, you can go along your merry way, fly all over the world, heat your homes, drive where you want and what you want — even an SUV — all without a worry about destroying the planet. Imagine that! SUV driving totally guilt-free! Isn’t $1 a day worth saving the planet for future generations? And if you think you can’t afford it, well……… don’t do it for you; do it for the children.
Sign up below for my carbon offset services. And as a GRAND OPENING SPECIAL, until supplies last, I’m offering a buy one get one free special. How about that? For every day of guilt-free living you pay for, you get one absolutely FREE of charge! So be the first on your block to sign up for Maxwell Appleseed’s carbon credit plan.
Small print (read, of course, at 450 wpm): Offer not valid where prohibited by law. The Maxwell Appleseed Carbon Credit Company makes no guarantees, either specifically or implied, that the total amount of carbon in the atmosphere will be reduced by these efforts, nor will the company provide data to determine the impact of these carbon reduction credits. The Maxwell Appleseed Carbon Credit Company reserves the right to decide when, where, how many, and how often trees will be planted on your behalf. The Maxwell Appleseed Carbon Credit Company is not responsible for anything you’re stupid enough to believe.