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Friday Yuk

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by bfilmfan

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The FBI has determined that it has provided an incorrect interpretation of Osama Bin Laden's latest message. Originally, it was beleived to be a terroristic threat to the United States and its citizens. The correct interpretation is:

"Hello. My name is Osama Bin Laden."

"My goat has died."

"I am very, very lonely."

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by oz_media

A driver is stuck in a traffic jam on the highway. Nothing was moving.
Suddenly a man knocks on the window.
The driver rolls down his window and asks, " What happened? "
" Terrorists have kidnapped Paul Martin, Stephen Harper, Jack Layton & Gilles Duceppe.
They are asking for a $10 million ransom.
Otherwise they are going to douse them with gasoline and set them on fire.
We are going from car to car, taking up a collection. "

The driver asks, " How much is everyone giving, on average? "

The man replies, " About a litre "

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Martin, Harper and Layton are flying on the Executive Airbus to a gathering in British Columbia when Martin turns to Harper and says, chuckling, You know, I could throw a $1000 bill out the window right now and make someone very happy. "

Harper shrugs and replies, " Well, I could throw ten $100 bills out the window and make ten people happy. "
Not to be outdone, Layton says, " Well I could throw a hundred $10 bills out the window and make a hundred people happy. "

The pilot rolls his eyes and says to his co-pilot, " Such arrogant losers back there. Hell, I could throw all three of them out the window and make 32 million people happy. "

Happy Voting!!!!!!

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