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Friday Yuk

By HAL 9000 Moderator ·
Here are a couple of the ones that will not attract any adverse attention.

One voter speaking to another "You know why I don't vote?" "No!" It's in case a Politician wins!"

The upcoming US vote is really important to Australia because it will decide who runs Au for the next 4 years and we don't even get a say in it!

And in keeping with the election theme.

A man meets St Peter at the Pearly gates and sees an enormous pile of clocks behind the wall. Upon asking what the clocks are for he is told that each one represents an individual and every time they tell a lie their clock advances one second.

He then asks have there been any cases of the clock never advancing? St Peter replies only one Mother Teressa!

The man then asks what about Gorge W Bush and St Peter replies OH Jesus is currently using that one for a ceiling fan as it is causing a vast air flow and cools his office quite nicely. Upon hearing this the man is shocked and asks is this usual for politicians? St Peter replies just be glad that you never had anything to do with John Howard the Australian Prime Minister his is moving so fast that it started causing Cyclones so we moved it straight to **** as it was causing far too many problems here.


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Well what about these?

by HAL 9000 Moderator In reply to Friday Yuk

"I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father.
" (Greg Norman)

"There have been injuries and deaths in boxing, but none of them
serious." (Alan Minter)

"Just under 10 seconds for Nigel Mansel. Call it 9.5 seconds in round
numbers." (Murray Walker)

"A brain scan revealed that Andrew Caddick is not suffering from
stress fracture of the shin." (Jo Sheldon)

"That's inches away from being millimetre perfect." (Ted Lowe)

"I'll fight Lloyd Honeyghan for nothing if the price is right."
(Marlon Starling)

"I can't tell who's leading. It's either Oxford or Cambridge." (John
Snagge - Boat Race between only Oxford and Cambridge)

"The Queen's Park Oval, exactly as its name suggests, is absolutely
round." (Tony Crozier)


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by Oz_Media In reply to Well what about these?

Real winners aren't they?

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I thought everyone

by HAL 9000 Moderator In reply to Yeah

Was Missing in Action as there has been no responses at all. I even left posting these until 12.30 AM Saturday morning my time in the hope that someone else would start the ball rolling.

I guess that they are all too tied up in the erections right?


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