Friday Yuk
Sorry Oz buddy...but Friday arrives here before it does there!
Two neighbours are constantly playing a game of one-upmanship. Ezra and Patrick are always trying to go one better than the other and as soon as one gets a new toy, the other has to follow suit. Strange behaviour, you might wonder, when you learn that Ezra is a Rabbi in the nearby synagogue and Patrick is a Catholic Priest at St. Marys.
One day, a Sears truck turns up at Fr. Patricks house, and the delivery man offloads a brand spanking new 38" wide-screen TV. Not to be outdone, Rabbi Ezra gets straight on the phone to Radio Shack, and the following day a huge 48" plasma TV arrives.
A week or so later, Patrick gets an above ground pool installed in the rear garden. Ezra isn't having any of that so he makes a few phone calls, and five days later, workmen have finished the new deck with gas barbecue and built-in hot tub.
Patrick starts fuming at this and gets on the phone to the local Harley Davidson dealer. He orders the biggest, flashiest bike they have in stock, with all the extra chrome and twiddly bits they can bolt on to it. Ezra overhears the conversation and follows suit, not to be black-catted.
The next Monday, a huge truck pulls up in the street outside their houses and the delivery man lets down a ramp, and wheels out two absolutely identical factory-fresh Harleys. One gets wheeled into Patricks drive, and the other is handed over to Ezra.
Both men glare at each other over the fence and debate their next move. Suddenly, Fr. Patrick runs into his house and returns a few minutes later with a bottle of holy water. He sprinkles some over the Harley and makes the sign of the cross over it. He then grins smugly at Ezra, silently defying him to beat that.
The Rabbi thinks for a few minutes, then goes into his house. Five minutes later, he appears with a hacksaw, goes over to his Harley...
...and saws two inches off the tailpipe!