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Fun with Spammers

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I got this email in my Yahoo account. My reply to them is right below:

Dear Friend,

Greetings to you and your family.

My name is Mrs.Rose Foster, undergoing medical treatment Germany.I have been
diagnosed with Esophageal cancer which was discovered very late, due to my
laxity in caring for my health.I was married to Dr. John Foster who worked
as a director with British Railway Commission for over a decade before he
died on 5th of July in the year 2003. We were married for fifteen years
without a child. He died after a brief illness that lasted for two
weeks.Before his death he made a vow to use his wealth for the less
privileged in the society. Since his death I decided not to re-marry or get
a child outside my matrimonial home.

I and my husband deposited the sum of US$9.5Million(Nine million five
hundred thousand dollar) to a finance firm in Europe as family valuables,and
now that my Doctor made it clear to me that I would not last long due to my
health that has resulted to stroke,I hereby seek for an assistance of an
honest and God fearing person to assist me distribute this funds to
orphanages,and those affected in the Tsunami in far Asia. I took this
decision because I do not have any child that will inherit this money and my
husband relatives are not inclined to helping poor people,they are only
after the money and I do not want my husbands hard earned money to be
misused or spent in the manner in which my late husband did not specify. I
do not want them to know about this development, this is why i am
contactingan external person and also i cannot carry this out because of my
condition.

As soon as I receive your reply I will introduce you as my partner,and shall
give you the contact of the Finance Firm where the funds are deposited as
Family valuables. I will also issue you a letter of authority and all other
documents that will empower you as the next beneficiary,through my Lawyer.

10% of the total sum will be yours for your kind assistance and time.

I expect your reply immediately.

Thank you and may the Almighty bless you.

Yours sincerely,

Mrs. Rose Foster
______________________________________________

Dear Mrs. Rose Foster.

My, my, my! What a story of tragedy and pain. You really should send your story to the LifeTime or Hallmar channels for development into a TV-movie.

Are you dying of squamous cell carcinoma or adenocarcinoma? And you had a stroke also? I am sure the stroke severly disrupted your ability to use the King's grammar correctly as is evidenced in your message.

And I am sure you meant that your husband was a member of the British Transport Commission and not the official sounding, but non-existent stated in your message.

And as an atheist, I don't believe in the Almighty or any other created fantasy deity.

I also don't believe badly written spam from some East European scam artist.

Frankly, I hope you do get cancer and die a painful death were nurses with large and hairy fingers have to reach into your innards on a regular basis.

Toodles!

PS: In the event you are on the level, send me the phone number of your financial firm and your bank account numbers and passwords and I will have my lovely friends at the bank transport it right on into my accounts.

And don't worry about spending it on the needy, I will tip the waitresses and my escort really well in Vegas.

13 replies

by neil higgins

with "idiots" spamming one of my mail boxes.As a Brit,I was once informed that I had won a share($25,000)of Hong Kong dollars,in their lottery.Note I have never been to Hong Kong.If I could give them my bank details,they would Pay Pal me the cheque,for a small fee of ?25 sterling.I told them to take their "fee" out of my winnings,and once I'd recieved confirmation of that,I would reply,giving them details of a box number address,where they could send my lovely cheque.Guess what happened?

by Member 25348569

I'm sometimes amazed, sometimes appalled at the number of people who still get sucked in by these cons. The latest in the UK is the "You have won a prize in the Spanish Lottery", followed by "Please send a handling fee and we will send you the prize".

OK, so you never bought a ticket, but you've won! Hello! Anything seem strange about that? Well, it would seem not.

Should I feel sorry for the victims?

The BBC's "Watchdog" - consumer affairs for the hard of thinking - recently had a half-hour piece on this.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/watchdog/reports/consumer/consumer_20051206.shtml

by jaqui

was I won a million pound sterling, because my name was drawn from a list of ms word users.

~rotflmao~

how do I use ms word when I don't own a copy of it?

by dmambo

BFilm, your share here won't even amount to a million. If I were you, I'd hold out for a better offer. I mean jdclyde was offered a lot more than this, and he wasn't even required to deal with those messy tsunami charities.

Be patient. Your ship will come in.

(Loved the "tip the waitresses" part. Shows your generous nature :D )

by dilipj

Yap! I did get some 21 millionj dollars but from African bank's lost account.

It's really a fun to go thru it but still I know some people do reply to such mails and get replied also.

IT's a bad time pass and for god sake let no one get looted because of such mails. One really can't imagine the acts of underworld...

by m_a_r_k

just for the hell of it. It was a sarcastic reply like yours, BFilmFan. But my email bounced back to me as undeliverable. The stupid spammer had an incorrect reply email address. Damn... it took all the fun out of my sarcastic reply. I guess they wanted me to call the phone number they provided rather than emailing. I should have called and jabbered with them for a bit.

by starderup

I replied back and notified the sender that I turned them in, and hoped that the culprits were lucky enough to see the FBI pulling into their driveway as they were reading my reply.

The sad thing is, about 5% of the recepients dutifully supply their personal information. So you can send one out to twenty people, and if the one that replies back is rich, that's better odds than the lottery by a millionfold.

by jdclyde

There is a ring in hell reserved for spammers!

See, religion DOES have value! :D

by mjd420nova

The most common scam in California is the lottery
ticket that is a winner, but is held by an illegal immigrant. They approach you with this
ticket that to all outward appearances to be a
million dollar winner. But and heres the catch,
they can't cash it in because they are not a
citizen. They want you to but it from them for
upwards of $25,000. You pay them and the ticket
is yours. I went in for this one time, but I put no money up front. I went with the person to
a local store to check out the lottery ticket.
It seems that they had altered the date on the
ticket so the date matched a previous draw with
the right numbers. A quick scan by the lotto machine proved this out, but by the time I had
this info, the ticket winner had disappeared.
It's pretty common out here, and usually happens
about once a month. They like to pick older
folks who they know are very money conscience
and think they may have gotten some free cash.

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