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  • #2259183

    Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

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    by mickster269 ·

    Here’s the deal. This weekend, a group of us are going to a cabin in a state park. Where are going to hike up a trail, and be off in the wilderness -really roughing it.

    There is a TV in the cabin. There is no cable reception , but there is a DVD player. (Yes, I know, “roughing” it ain’t what it used to be.)

    For entertainment, we have decided to hold a contest. The rules are, we can bring 3 movies. The person that brings the worst movie (as voted on by their peers) wins a prize, and bragging rights.

    I need ideas for a really, really bad movie to bring. My first two choices are:

    1. Howard the Duck

    2. Ishtar

    I can’t decide on the third one. Does anyone here have any particular “favorite” bad movie?

All Comments

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    Replies
    • #3199691

      Easy choice

      by ben “iron” damper ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      Ford Fairlane, that movie that was horrible in the early 90’s with Andrew Dice Clay as the star. It’s bad trust me! You can still rent it at Blockbuster or pick it up at Best Buy in the bargain bin.

      Another bad one, Show Girls.

    • #3199678

      How about…

      by leee ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      Hudson Hawk? It actually has a plot, though, however flimsy. But with a cast including Frank Stallone, Sandra Bernhard and David Caruso – all signs of quality – this flick with Bruce Willis and Danny Aiello as singing bank robbers… well, I can’t manage to finish the sentence. Bring the popcorn. Have fun. Win the bet.

      Edited to add: I hear ‘Battlefield Earth,’ ‘Gigli’ and that ‘American Idol’ movie are pretty bad too. See ’em and let me know.

      • #3199653

        Battlefield Earth

        by jdclyde ·

        In reply to How about…

        The odd thing is, I had read that a long time ago and didn’t even realize it was the same until I had rented it and started watching. It just all came back…..

        Book was at least entertaining.

        • #3199646

          Wait a minute!

          by mickster269 ·

          In reply to Battlefield Earth

          Battlefield Earth – it was rather campy, and it DID have a great shower scene.

          Now, Battlefield Earth II – that was prettyy bad…

        • #3283931

          ?

          by ed woychowsky ·

          In reply to Wait a minute!

          They made a sequel?

        • #3283899

          News to me

          by jdclyde ·

          In reply to ?

          .

        • #3283130

          Sequl apparently planned, but ditched

          by tink! ·

          In reply to ?

          after the negative response to the first film.

          It may not have been quite as bad if Travolta hadn’t played the main bad guy. Hearing his voice come out of that seemingly menacing creature…just did not fit one bit. That one effect ruins the film right away.

    • #3199661

      My choice

      by jdclyde ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      The Toxic Avenger!

    • #3199648

      Another good\bad choice

      by ben “iron” damper ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      Last Action Hero starring the Governator Arnold.

      • #3199641

        Need some guidelines

        by jdclyde ·

        In reply to Another good\bad choice

        Do you want horrible shows that were so bad they were good, or just hard to sit through shows?

        I still LOVE the opening of Howard The Duck when he is sitting there reading “PlayDuck”. 😀

        • #3199630

          I think we need the really bad ones-

          by mickster269 ·

          In reply to Need some guidelines

          We will be in a Cabin, miles from civilization.

          There will be no escaping the movies.

    • #3199644

      Okay..here’s a few

      by maecuff ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      Reefer Madness

      Cabin Boy

      Freddy Got Fingered

      Glitter

      Jaws: The Revenge

      Rhinestone

      It’s Pat

      That’s all I can come up with. I’ll have to ask my husband, he should be able to come up with a few..

    • #3199642

      Mick……!

      by gadgetgirl ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      You did it again!

      I couldn’t remember the name of the damn film, so I’ve wasted AAAAAAAAGES finding it….

      But I did. Dog with bone syndrome set in…

      Right. Shivers:

      http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0073705/

      badly acted, stupid story, you know where they’re going every step of the way. Dodgy scenery, too!

      Put it this way – it was so bad, I could remember it, just not the name!

      And the other one: Slime People…

      http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0056499/

      Grief, that’s REAL B movie stuff. Wouldn’t frighten a fly or interest an ant.

      Now, what was I meant to be doing? Ah. Yes. Work…..! 😀

      GG

    • #3199640

      What!!?? No Plan 9 or Ator?

      by jmgarvin ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      You can’t go wrong with Ed Wood and a REALLY bad Conan rip off.

      Plan 9 From Outerspace: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0052077/
      Best quote ever:
      Future events such as these will affect you in the future

      Ator: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0085183/
      Too many awful lines to choose from 😉

      Enjoy!

    • #3199611

      Mick, please select “Millennium”

      by dmambo ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      wherein Kris Kristofferson and Cheryl Ladd star as time travelers who, after their society has already been ruined though their affecting the past, stop time seconds before airplane crashes and replace the soon-to-be dead humans with carbon-based droids for the recovery squads to pick up. It is sooooo bad, yet oddly entertaining. Total cheese.

      http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0097883/usercomments

      Edit: After reading the user reviews at the link above, I’m more convinced that you need to choose this dog. Several reviewers loved it, while others absolutely hated it. A disparity which makes for the best of the bad movies. Mick, you need to choose “Millennium”!!!!!

      • #3199579

        Perv

        by jdclyde ·

        In reply to Mick, please select “Millennium”

        Doesn’t Cheryl show some flesh in that one? :0

        How about Saturn5. Get a partial shot of Farrah! woo woo! ]:)

        • #3283955

          Back then, yeah! :D

          by dmambo ·

          In reply to Perv

          Hey it was the 80’s and before that was the 70’s. It was a wild time, man.

          Edit: And thinking back on some of the impure thoughts that I might or might not have had in the 80’s, Cheryl Ladd was featured in a very large proportion of them. With good reason!!! ]:)

        • #3282367

          Since we are down this path …

          by too old for it ·

          In reply to Perv

          Quest for Fire (Rae Dawn Chong)

          Barbarella (“Hanoi Jane” Fonda)

          One Million Years B.C. (Raquel Welch)

        • #3282334

          One Million Years B.C

          by jdclyde ·

          In reply to Since we are down this path …

          The first show where I NOTICED a hot babe! Oh yeah, Raquel was HOT!

      • #3283847

        Mambo’s totally right…but

        by vanessaj ·

        In reply to Mick, please select “Millennium”

        this would fall under the category of “unable to sit through” kind of bad. I can’t remember a movie that I liked least. (And they still play it on the movie channels…you know, when there’s 600 channels and nothing on? – go figure!) But it really is one of the very worst! :_|

    • #3199597

      Day of the Leapus

      by tig2 ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      Starring De Forrest Kelly. (Dr. Mc Coy- Star Trek fame)

      This is the worst of the worst. A close second is the one that the guy who played Chekov was in. It was so bad my memory was forced to fail in self defense. Finally, there are some serious stinkers starring George Takai.

      Worst music? Leonard Nimoy’s rendition of “Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds”. Guarenteed to cause your ears to bleed. I know. I own a copy…

      • #3199592

        Tig, just whom do you think you’re addressing??!!

        by dmambo ·

        In reply to Day of the Leapus

        This is TR. When you mention DeForest Kelly, you don’t need to add “(Dr. Mc Coy- Star Trek fame)”. We already know that.

        And I believe that it would be more proper to refer to Walter Koenig by his name.

        Sheesh!

        (BTW – Nimoy’s album IS bad. Shatner’s is too!)

        • #3283937

          Sorry DMambo

          by tig2 ·

          In reply to Tig, just whom do you think you’re addressing??!!

          But people on this site have asked me what keypunch is. I do things like that only in self defense.

          Now that you refresh my failing memory, you’re right. I should have mentioned Walter Koenig.

          And a minor point of disagreement. Shatner’s was marginally worse than Nimoy’s. But worse nonetheless. Until Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds. Then Nimoy is MUCH worse indeed.

        • #3282363

          Shatner’s may be bad, however …

          by too old for it ·

          In reply to Tig, just whom do you think you’re addressing??!!

          … I can still DJ “Common People” and get them up and dancing.

          Go figure.

    • #3199594

      Attack of the Killer Tomatoes won

      by vanessaj ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      Worst Movie years ago. And, yeah, it was really bad, in a great, entertaining, b-movie kinda way. The remake of The Blob was pretty bad – (the original was likeable). I recently saw Vendetta in the theatre – it totally SUCKED!!! I’ve never been so mad about spending 20 bucks and wasting 2 hours. Total waste of celluloid (do they still use that?). But I’m not sure if that’s on video yet. Let us know what you chose.

      • #3199577

        V is in the stores already

        by jdclyde ·

        In reply to Attack of the Killer Tomatoes won

        v for vendetta was so bad it had to go to dvd before people forgot about it. You know, all the people that won’t pay for it at the theater but will buy them?

        • #3282361

          V the DVD

          by too old for it ·

          In reply to V is in the stores already

          Skinny girls in pleather catsuits sell all the time in the bargain bin.

        • #3282335

          REALLY?

          by jdclyde ·

          In reply to V the DVD

          you have gotten my attention….. Go on…. More about the skinny girls in the pleather catsuits please! 😀

        • #3284940

          And if you take …

          by too old for it ·

          In reply to REALLY?

          … vanessaj’s list, my addition of the belly baring top in the cold, add a heroine in a pleather cat suit.

          Who sez you need a story or a plot?

      • #3283890

        But unlike Blob, Killer Tomatoes

        by jamesrl ·

        In reply to Attack of the Killer Tomatoes won

        was SUPPOSED to be cheezy.

        James

        • #3283845

          Then the tomato dudes accomplished what they set out to do

          by vanessaj ·

          In reply to But unlike Blob, Killer Tomatoes

          I did enjoy it for it’s entertainment value, though. It was very funny to watch (the old “trainwreck” thing where you just couldn’t tear your eyes away). It’s been many years…I’ll have to find that one again. Hhhhmmmmmm…

    • #3199588

      I Eat Your Skin

      by ewaters ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      It’s so bad it says it’s the worst movie ever made right on the cover.
      It’s a movie about zombies on a tropical type island. It has the worst “special effects” (if u can even call them that) and plot I have ever encountered.

      • #3199576

        not a Beatty fan

        by fungus-among-us ·

        In reply to I Eat Your Skin

        I agree with Ishtar for sure… add another Beatty bomb… REDS (1981)

        I’m assuming you’re wanting “Hollywood” grade bombs… as I think ALL “B” movies are lame… including the ones with “Cult” status.

        Batman & Robin, Superman 2-3&4, Dumb & Dumberer, Popeye (1980), Can’t Stop the Music, Grease 2, The Postman, Waterworld, The Gods Must Be Crazy (&2), SpiceWorld, Cheech & Chong’s The Corsican brothers, Stop or My Mom Will Shoot, Heartbeeps, Shanghi Surprise, The Adventures of Pluto Nash, Arthur 2, Speed 2 and Xanadu. I’m sure there are plenty of others… I’ve probably seen most of them.

    • #3199581

      Ooh! Another one!

      by leee ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      ‘Point Break’ with two of the great non-actors of our time, Keanu Reeves and Patrick Swayze.

      Plot (if it dare be called that): Swayze fronts a gang of criminals who rob banks in ex-president masks to finance their surfing lifestyle. Ke-ah-noo is an FBI agent dispatched to infiltrate the group. Of course, then he falls for one of the chicks and has to prove he’s not a fed… blah blah blah…

      • #3283841

        Point Break was pretty bad, but what about…

        by vanessaj ·

        In reply to Ooh! Another one!

        that one really great line that I always try to remember, but can never get it right…Swayze turns to Reeves and asks something like…”so how does it feel getting ready to jump out of a perfectly good airplane…” or something to that effect. It was better when he said it.

        And you have to admit that the photography in the first 60 seconds of the movie with the camera inside those really huge waves, looking up, was just so beautiful – I’ve never seen any other to match it…ever.

        But those really were the only highlights. Thanks for posting, Leee!

    • #3199575

      Stuck on You

      by beth blakely ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      I watched Stuck on You and never laughed. Not once. It’s just bad.
      http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0338466/

      The plot:
      “Conjoined twins from Martha’s Vineyard move to Los Angeles so that one of them can pursue an acting career.”

      I was disappointed since the Farrelly brothers, Greg Kinnear, and Matt Damon were all involved. I figured one of them would make me laugh just a little bit. Nope.

    • #3199571

      Worst movies ever

      by protiusx ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      Back in the eighties (I am dating myself here) I was given free tickets to see a show called “Ator”. It was so bad that we left in mid show and it was free! Really really bad. The other worst movie of all time (so bad the producer should be fined and given prison time for wasting the plastic to make the DVD) is “Kill Bill”. Honestly, I think I am going to have to run to the lue just thinking about it.

      • #3283904

        The problem with Kill Bill

        by jamesrl ·

        In reply to Worst movies ever

        It was meant to be one movie and not two, and the second movie contained alot of the background that made the first movie make sense.

        The other problem is that he was paying homage to a number of different directors of 70s action flicks and given they had different styles, it made for a somewhat jarring experience.

        If you watch Kill Bill II, then Kill Bill I, it will all make sense.

        James

        • #3283898

          Watch the second one first?

          by jdclyde ·

          In reply to The problem with Kill Bill

          or watch in order and then go back again?

          Never saw either of them, yet.

        • #3283836

          Don’t bother seeing them, jd…

          by vanessaj ·

          In reply to Watch the second one first?

          they both sucked! They were just another violence slime-fest with no real…well…anything. Just more of the same from a Hollywood-acclaimed-because-no-one-with-talent-would-invest-in-any-of-his-movies director who wants to “push the envelope” which really just means it darker, dirtier, more callous and less realistic and made just to get a little GSR from those who don’t recognize that there isn’t anything worth seeing in the whole thing. He sucks, too, by the way. IMHO :p

        • #3283834

          Don’t

          by protiusx ·

          In reply to Watch the second one first?

          It’s a waste of time, money, and what ever else you may expend while watching that garbage.

        • #3283814

          I’m going to disagree

          by maecuff ·

          In reply to Watch the second one first?

          And suggest that you DO watch the Kill Bill movies. I didn’t mind that they were out of order, it wasn’t much different than watching Pulp Fiction(as far as order goes). It’s campy and over the top and Uma Thurman absolutely kicks ass…

          I guess it depends on what you like. I like the Kill Bills much for the same reasons I like Natural Born Killers. Get past the gore and watch it for the satire that it is. It’s so completely over the top, it ceases to be disturbing. Personally, I like most of Tarantino’s films. True Romance was awesome.

          Don’t watch it with kids, though..they makes Pulp Fiction look like a Disney film.

        • #3283809

          thanks for the heads up

          by jdclyde ·

          In reply to I’m going to disagree

          about the kid warning, as about the only time I watch movies is with the boys.

        • #3283808

          It’s not really

          by maecuff ·

          In reply to thanks for the heads up

          the violence, like I said, it’s so over the top, it’s cartoonish, there is some disturbing sexual content that I wouldn’t recommend for kids.

        • #3283805

          Hmmmmm

          by jdclyde ·

          In reply to It’s not really

          now I HAVE to watch it! ]:)

        • #3283782

          Trust me..

          by maecuff ·

          In reply to It’s not really

          It ain’t sexy.

          Uma is in a coma and is ‘rented’ out by someone who works at the home she is in. She comes to and kills a ‘client’ by biting his tongue out of his head..

        • #3283765

          Are you sure

          by jdclyde ·

          In reply to It’s not really

          that it isn’t directed by Tim Burton? :0

          Is that the first one or second one to watch out for? Is the other acceptable for youth?

        • #3283716

          That scene is

          by maecuff ·

          In reply to It’s not really

          in the first one. Other than that, it’s just, well, you know, heads getting chopped off. The fight scene with Lucy Lui (sp?) Is very interesting.

          The second one? It’s not quite as over the top, still a whole boat load of graphic violence, but not as much. I would have let my son watch it at 14 (I think he was 14 or 15 when he watched Pulp Fiction). I wouldn’t let my 8 year old watch them now.

        • #3209299

          The films he draws from

          by jamesrl ·

          In reply to It’s not really

          Kill Bill is an homage to a number of martial arts/actions films of the seventies. One of the actors in the second one starred in some of those movies. The action sections are similar to those made in China, badly dubbed, lots of wire work and incredible stunts things.

          The Lucy Liu fight is full of superb photography. Its really more in the japanese adult cartoon manga style – think the black and white comic batman novels.

          Its is full of heroes and villans.

          You don’t understand the motivation of why she was in the hospital or why she is so hateful until you watch the second movie.

          James

        • #3209310

          This says a lot

          by protiusx ·

          In reply to I’m going to disagree

          about why you and I generally disagree on most things.

        • #3209288

          I think the

          by maecuff ·

          In reply to This says a lot

          reasons why we disagree goes way beyond taste in movies..

        • #3282356

          Kill Bill?

          by too old for it ·

          In reply to The problem with Kill Bill

          Any movie with Lucy Liu and the 5.6.7.8’s in it can’t be all bad.

    • #3283964

      Evil Dead I

      by wingedmonkey ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      Very bad movie, perfect for being in a cabin out in the middle of nowhere

      • #3283830

        Winged, that’s just cruel…

        by vanessaj ·

        In reply to Evil Dead I

        Or maybe it would be cool to watch it in the woods, or any of those movies where they’re stuck in the woods…and there’s always a girl who, with someone outside that’s killing people, decides the best thing for her to do is to go outside, and then always ends up running really slowly and looking behind her to watch it chase her and screams so loud that anyone/thing can easily follow her and know where she is so they/it chase(s) her and she cries and falls down in her high-heels that she just happened to be wearing out in the woods, camping and then just stays on the ground and watches as the monster/man/whoever/whatever comes crouching slowly toward her as she just lays there and screams and then all you see is the empty shoe the next day.

        Yeah, that’s what I’d do.

        • #3283801

          The freaked out screeming woman

          by jdclyde ·

          In reply to Winged, that’s just cruel…

          the one that you are praying to be the next one to get it just to shut her friggen trap, and she is the only one to make it! GRRRRRRR!

        • #3283697

          You rock V

          by wingedmonkey ·

          In reply to Winged, that’s just cruel…

          You had me laughing, Ty

        • #3282354

          You forgot to include …

          by too old for it ·

          In reply to Winged, that’s just cruel…

          … cmaping out int he woods in the snow/rain/sleet wearing a see-thourgh spagehetti-strap midriff-baring top and skin tight jeans/butt shorts/pj’s …

          Given half an afternoon we could write and format a movie script here …

    • #3283958

      Two that spring to mind: ‘Gigli’ and ‘Heaven’s Gate’

      by eddie n ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      The only good part of “Gigli” is watching Jennifer Lopez in that yoga scene. After that, it is all downhill.

      And “Heaven’s Gate” is one of the greatest flops of all time. Sure to be a hit with your cabin mates.

    • #3283932

      Hudson Hawk

      by m_a_r_k ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      it’s the only movie I’ve ever walked out of. Oh…wait, there was one other movie that I walked out in the middle of. One of the Batman movies where I had an upset stomach and I spent the first half of the movie in the restroom puking.

      • #3283892

        Hudson Hawk had some really great scenes.

        by x-marcap ·

        In reply to Hudson Hawk

        Call -1-800- I’m going to #$&)(*$ die.

        If you can suspend your need to believe the movie is possible, or historical, the scene with the Mona Lisa is hilarious…

        This is also a cartoonish flavored movie.
        Andie MacDowell is always lovely…

    • #3283929

      A zombie flick

      by ed woychowsky ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      Children Shouldn’t Play with Dead Things

      The budget was around $600.00 US, most of which went to beer.

    • #3283921

      my picks..

      by heml0ck ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      Flesh Gordon… ’70’s pseudo p0rn based on Flash Gordon… really lame

      Tremors… Kevin Bacon, giant worms… nuff zed?

      Domino… what a waste of two hours

      And finally,

      The Matrix Pt3… anyone with kids seen DragonBall Z? That’s all I could think of in the finale…

      • #3209328

        HEY!!! Tremors was cool!!

        by fungus-among-us ·

        In reply to my picks..

        It’s the rest of them…

        Tremors 2, Tremors 3, and Tremors 4 that REALLY REALY sucked. Tremors only sucked a little.

        • #3209312

          Had quite a bit of humor

          by jdclyde ·

          In reply to HEY!!! Tremors was cool!!

          some dumb parts, and some parts so dumb they were funny.

          Kevin was a believable moron in that show. Well done. 😀

          assblasters…… As the lead in the rest of them IS a Canadian, can we blame them for how bad they are? ;\

        • #3209297

          Huh?

          by jamesrl ·

          In reply to Had quite a bit of humor

          Helen Shaver is Canadian, but not the lead – who you talking about?

          James

        • #3209281

          DRAT! Foiled again!

          by jdclyde ·

          In reply to Huh?

          I thought I had heard that Michael Gross was a Canuck. My mistake. 🙁

          [i]
          I know. I can go to my origianl post and remove that part! The world would never know! 😀

      • #3209313

        If we talk aninmation

        by jdclyde ·

        In reply to my picks..

        Pokemon the movie was the worst experience of my life! Good LORD that was horrible.

        And the tears of the pokemon saved the day…..

        (I was the good dad and took my boys. I have let them know they own me for life for that one!)

    • #3283916

      There is a difference

      by maecuff ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      between campy and bad. Like the Evil Dead movies, Bruce Campbell is awesome. Truly bad movies (IMHO) have no merit at all and are not in the slightest entertaining.. And I did think of another truly horrid movie, Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band..the one with the Bee Gees and Peter Frampton. Now THAT is a bad movie.

      Speaking of Bruce Campbell, Bubba Ho-tep is a riot. I’ve heard MANY people say it’s horrible, but I thought it was a riot.

      • #3283912

        Mae, you MUST see

        by tig2 ·

        In reply to There is a difference

        Johnny English. You’d get it. Too funny.

        I will still support “Day of the Leapus” as the worst movie ever made, bar none. Giant homicidal bunny rabbits… Need I say more? If there was a plot, I never found it. This loser isn’t even B material. Possibly Z. Maybe.

        Homicidal bunnys. Now really!

      • #3283900

        Bubba Ho-tep…

        by leee ·

        In reply to There is a difference

        I actually enjoyed. It could have been a lot worse.

    • #3283915

      Any movie with Tom Cruise

      by m_a_r_k ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      He’s a moron. And an idiot. And a dork.

      • #3283911

        And he was at the top of his game in Top Gun

        by dmambo ·

        In reply to Any movie with Tom Cruise

        I know a couple of Navy pilots, and even they hated that movie.

        Amazing that it was so popular.

      • #3283910

        Hear, Hear!

        by tig2 ·

        In reply to Any movie with Tom Cruise

        Can’t stand him either. Not even fun to look at. What a waste…

      • #3283894

        I’m not a fan

        by maecuff ·

        In reply to Any movie with Tom Cruise

        but I thought Collateral and Magnolia were very good.

        • #3283887

          I liked “Minority Report”

          by dmambo ·

          In reply to I’m not a fan

          But I supposed it could have been anyone, even Keanu Reeve, in the lead and I still would have liked it.

          I also liked “The Firm”, which featured Tom.

      • #3283849

        I here thought I was the only one…

        by vanessaj ·

        In reply to Any movie with Tom Cruise

        who was mystified by his success. No talent, really and no attraction for me. His agent picked good movies for him to be in, but I never thought he had much acting talent. I have always thought I was the only one in the world who felt that way but didn’t want to rain on everyone else’s parade…kinda like the Beach Boys.

        • #3283817

          they just came by not long ago

          by jdclyde ·

          In reply to I here thought I was the only one…

          tickets for $5, and they still couldn’t sell the place out. Talk about washed up! But then again, I am not old enough to have EVER known them to be good. :0

          But then again, that generation really didn’t have much musical talent, so in comparision it must have been good by that mark? ;\

        • #3283813

          When did the

          by maecuff ·

          In reply to I here thought I was the only one…

          Beach Boys rain on someone’s parade? 🙂

          The Beach Boys influenced generations of musicians. They influenced artists during their own time period. Pet Sounds is continuously recognized as one the best albums of all times. Oh..even the Beatles said they were influenced by the Beach Boys. I can certainly understand not LIKING the Beach Boys, but I can’t understand the statement that they have no talent..

        • #3209267

          Brian Wilson

          by jamesrl ·

          In reply to When did the

          Brian was the heart and soul of the band. He sang the lead, he wrote the songs. After Pet Sounds he took a 20 year depressive funk, and basically stayed in bed.

          I saw the Beach Boys in concert in the late 70s. Brian of course, was not there. They were drunk, it was depressing. Clearly there was no life or energy in the band without their leader.

          Paul McCartney said there would be no Sgt Peppers without Pet Sounds.

          James

      • #3283831

        I have no idea….

        by m_a_r_k ·

        In reply to Any movie with Tom Cruise

        why the schmuck is such a big-time movie star. He has no real talent and his roles are the same where he does preposterously unrealistic stunts. He overacts in all of his movies. Maybe his jumping off the couch stunt and all his other weird antics lately will finally open the public’s eyes to his lunacy. Paramount Pictures did fire his stupid ass a couple of days ago for his oddball behavior.

      • #3282348

        Yeah, but Risky Business is worth a watch

        by too old for it ·

        In reply to Any movie with Tom Cruise

        … if only for Rebecca De Mornay in her prime.

        • #3283340

          Tom Cruise has been

          by vanessaj ·

          In reply to Yeah, but Risky Business is worth a watch

          very lucky, I think, when it comes to films. He has been in some good ones, and I even think I saw a glimmer of actual acting in Collateral. Some of the conversation in the cab really caught my attention. He was really good in a couple of places and I was very surprised.

          But mostly it seems he is the same person playing the same role all the time, but you have to agree that he picks some good movies to be in. Risky Business was great for its era and The Firm was fun to watch – all the way through, if you like that genre. I do. And even though Vanilla Sky was painful to sit through, I had to watch it twice, just to be sure…

          There are some actors that actually become a wide range of very different characters in their movies – Did anyone see Kevin Bacon in Sleepers! WOW. He started out leaning on comedic roles, but has really come full-cirlcle. One of my favorites is Stir of Echos. “Gotta dig.” But he first caught my attention in Flatliners – which was in my original “Kiefer” collection. You never lost the character, with him. He was really good.

          I suggest Stir of Echos for a scary movie for the camping trip.

        • #3283335

          Stir of Echos

          by maecuff ·

          In reply to Tom Cruise has been

          was awesome. I think that since it came out around the same time as the Sixth Sense that it didn’t get the attention it should have. I actually thought that Stir of Echos was better than The Sixth Sense.

        • #3283188

          Yes, without doubt. And Sleepers

          by vanessaj ·

          In reply to Stir of Echos

          was one of the most painful movies I ever sat through. I think you can see the height of great acting in it – but again – never really marketed. And you really HATE Kevin Bacon’s character – want to sting him up…tar and feather…draw and quarter, etc. etc. etc. He played it really just so well. Wow. It’s also the first movie I really liked Brad Pitt in. Not “empty” drama like most I see today, but well written, great directing, a story that is on the edge, yet only borderline fiction…impactful. I recommend it, but not for kiddies. It deals with tough subjects.

        • #3283156

          I agree

          by maecuff ·

          In reply to Yes, without doubt. And Sleepers

          And that is how I feel about 21 grams and Mystic River, they were great movies, but I don’t ever want to watch them again.

    • #3283903

      My favorite Campy movie is….

      by x-marcap ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      The Villian. The star of the movie is a horse.

      Ann-Margret,Kurt Douglas, Arnold Schwartzenegger are titularly the stars, but Whiskey steals the show. Paul Lynde as an Indian chief. too many gags to enumerate…

      My favorite line from the movie is:
      My name is Handsome Stranger, I was named after my father.

      Pefect dead pan delivery! Arnold delivers this line as though he understands not a word of English, although he pronounces it perfectly, and not seeming to understand a word of the concept.

      • #3283886

        which is it?

        by storch ·

        In reply to My favorite Campy movie is….

        I can’t decide if the film, Killer Klowns from Outer Space, is campy or just plain awful. The makeup is great and is gruesome enough to bring all clown-phobic folks’ worst nightmares to life. Maybe that’s why it had some perverse appeal to me.

        I never was a fan of clowns and always wondered why many parents force them on small and often terrified children. Finally, a film that presents clowns as some of us truly see them!

    • #3283885

      I have a huge list,

      by turnier ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      but some may be hard to find. Here are just a few…

      “Baby Geniuses” — Kathleen Turner and Christopher Lloyd try to decode baby talk to “learn the secrets of the ages”. Genius baby Sly escapes from the lab and tries to organize fellow babies in a revolt. Incredibly inane trash.

      OMG! I just found out there’s a sequel to this one — “SuperBabies: Baby Geniuses 2″… I can’t wait to see it!

      “Boxing Helena” — Sherilyn Fenn is hit by a car in front of the home of a deranged surgeon, who performes emergency surgery to save her life. He cuts off her arms and legs and places her in a box for safekeeping. Directed by Jennifer Chambers Lynch (David Lynch’s daughter), Kim Basinger payed $9 million NOT to star in it (broke her contract).

      “The Apple” — A musical set in the future (1994!?!) with Catherine Mary Stewart. Evil Mr. Boogalow wants take over the world, so he creates a bogus worldwide songwriting contest and rigs the global broadcast with brainwashing music. Bad acting, bad costumes, bad music.

      edited to remove the Blair Witch set… upon some reflection, I’ve decided that they are bad, just not necessarily “the worst ever”

    • #3283883

      Another one – – “Devil’s Advocate”

      by dmambo ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      Keanu Reeve, whose best work was “Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure”, starred as the spawn of Satan who went to work as a lawyer in daddy’s firm. Really bad!!

      But the scene with the girls licking in the elevator might remain on the minds of impure people after the movie ends, so it might have one redeeming feature. Hope that doesn’t disqualify it.

    • #3283848

      or ANYTHING with Van Dam

      by vanessaj ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      ’nuff said.

      • #3283818

        Oh god PLEASE

        by jdclyde ·

        In reply to or ANYTHING with Van Dam

        don’t make me sit through Universal Soldier II AGAIN! AAAAAAAA! Talk about a horrible show! I actually thought most of the first one was acceptable though.

        • #3283773

          Not the worst. . .

          by bkinsey1 ·

          In reply to Oh god PLEASE

          You think Van Damme’s bad? Try Steven Seagal. . . Very few things will make me change the channels instantly (I seem to have a high threshold for bad movies, if only to laugh at), but he does. *shudder*

          Still, for a REALLY, classically bad movie, I’ve always favored ‘Manos, the Hands of Fate’. It’s old, and I’ve never actually bothered to watch it, but how can 12,482 people be wrong?

          http://imdb.com/title/tt0060666/

    • #3283820

      Killer Klowns from Outer Space

      by maxwell edison ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      Hands down winner.

      • #3283807

        I am embarrassed to know

        by jdclyde ·

        In reply to Killer Klowns from Outer Space

        about getting wrapped up in cotton candy coccons…… :0

        This show would scare show?

        Now if you want a scary clown, NO ONE can touch Pennywise! 😀

        • #3283806

          I thought he was scarier

          by maecuff ·

          In reply to I am embarrassed to know

          in the book than the movie..but then again, I have an active imagination. 🙂

    • #3283812

      Cannibal! The Musical.

      by llamrei ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      With hit tunes like “Shpadoinkle” and “When I Was On Top Of You”, how can you go wrong?

    • #3283676

      Update-

      by mickster269 ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      After reading all of the suggestions, I’ve decided to make some changes.

      I’m leaving “Ishtar” home – That’s such a famously bad movie that I think some others might bring it.

      Keeping “Howard the Duck”. It’s really bad, but I think it’s under-appreciated in it’s depth of “bad:.

      Adding “Millenium” – I haven’t seen it, but the plot sounds so bad, it’s gotta stink.

      Still thinking about the 3rd one –

      • #3283665

        Can’t go wrong

        by dmambo ·

        In reply to Update-

        Mick, Millennium is a fabulous choice. Enjoy – in a manner of speaking – and be sure to have plenty of beer on hand.

        Be sure to let us know how the weekend at the movies goes. I hope it rains all weekend for you so you can get a lot of viewing in.

        For the 3rd, consider the 50’s version of “The Blob” My kids loved its badness.

      • #3283658

        Not kidding with Day of the Leapus

        by tig2 ·

        In reply to Update-

        Brief Synopsis:

        Small town overrun by gigantic homicidal bunny rabbits. De Forrest Kelly gets the girl (finally).

        See- not much to it but some superbly bad acting.

        We used to do “Bad Movie Friday”. This one won hands down and I don’t think that my old buds have found anything worse.

        What could be worse than homicidal bunnies?

        Incidentally, this was not intended to be a B movie… they were serious. Scary.

        • #3209337

          There he is!

          by jdclyde ·

          In reply to Not kidding with Day of the Leapus

          Memorable Quotes from
          Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975)
          Knights of Camelot: [singing] We’re knights of the Round Table, we dance whene’er we’re able. We do routines and chorus scenes with footwork impec-cable, We dine well here in Camelot, we eat ham and jam and Spam a lot. / We’re knights of the Round Table, our shows are for-mi-dable. But many times we’re given rhymes that are quite un-sing-able, We’re opera mad in Camelot, we sing from the diaphragm a lot. / In war we’re tough and able, Quite in-de-fa-ti-gable. Between our quests we sequin vests and impersonate Clark Gable / It’s a busy life in Camelot
          [solo]
          Knights of Camelot: I have to push the pram a lot.
          King of Swamp Castle: Listen, Alice…
          Prince Herbert: Herbert.
          King of Swamp Castle: Herbert…
          Minstrel: [singing] Bravely bold Sir Robin rode forth from Camelot. He was not afraid to die, oh brave Sir Robin. He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways, brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin. He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp, or to have his eyes gouged out, and his elbows broken. To have his kneecaps split, and his body burned away, and his limbs all hacked and mangled, brave Sir Robin. His head smashed in and heart cut out, and his liver removed, and his bowels unplugged, and his nostrils ripped and his bottom burned off and his penis…
          Sir Robin: That’s, uh, that’s enough music for now, lads… looks like there’s dirty work afoot.
          Minstrel: [singing] Brave Sir Robin ran away…
          Sir Robin: *No!*
          Minstrel: [singing] bravely ran away away…
          Sir Robin: *I didn’t!*
          Minstrel: [singing] When danger reared its ugly head, he bravely turned his tail and fled. Yes, brave Sir Robin turned about, and valiantly, he chickened out. Bravely taking to his feet, he beat a very brave retreat. A brave retreat by brave Sir Robin.
          God: What are you doing now?
          King Arthur: Averting our eyes, oh Lord.
          God: Well, don’t. It’s just like those miserable psalms, always so depressing. Now knock it off!
          King of Swamp Castle: Please! This is supposed to be a happy occasion. Let’s not bicker and argue over who killed who.
          God: Every time I try to talk to someone it’s “sorry this” and “forgive me that” and “I’m not worthy”…
          French Soldier: I don’t want to talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper. I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries.
          Sir Galahad: Is there someone else up there we can talk to?
          French Soldier: No, now go away or I shall taunt you a second time.
          Sir Lancelot: We were in the nick of time. You were in great peril.
          Sir Galahad: I don’t think I was.
          Sir Lancelot: Yes, you were. You were in terrible peril.
          Sir Galahad: Look, let me go back in there and face the peril.
          Sir Lancelot: No, it’s too perilous.
          Sir Galahad: Look, it’s my duty as a knight to sample as much peril as I can.
          Sir Lancelot: No, we’ve got to find the Holy Grail. Come on.
          Sir Galahad: Oh, let me have just a little bit of peril?
          Sir Lancelot: No. It’s unhealthy.
          Sir Galahad: I bet you’re gay.
          Sir Lancelot: Am not.
          King Arthur: [after Arthur’s cut off both of the Black Knight’s arms] Look, you stupid Bastard. You’ve got no arms left.
          Black Knight: Yes I have.
          King Arthur: *Look*!
          Black Knight: It’s just a flesh wound.
          French Soldier: Un cadeau.
          Other French soldiers: A what?
          French Soldier: A present.
          Other French soldiers: Oh. Un cadeau.
          Other French soldiers: Oui oui.
          French Soldier: Allons y!
          Other French soldiers: What?
          French Soldier: Let’s go!
          Other French soldiers: Oh.
          [repeated line]
          King Arthur: Run away!
          Sir Bedevere: What makes you think she’s a witch?
          Peasant 3: Well, she turned me into a newt!
          Sir Bedevere: A newt?
          Crowd: [meekly after a long pause] … I got better.
          Crowd: [shouts] Burn her anyway!
          Large Man with Dead Body: Who’s that then?
          The Dead Collector: I dunno, must be a king.
          Large Man with Dead Body: Why?
          The Dead Collector: He hasn’t got shit all over him.
          French Soldier: You don’t frighten us, English pig dogs. Go and boil your bottoms, you sons of a silly person. I blow my nose at you, so-called “Arthur King,” you and all your silly English K-nig-hts.
          French Soldier: Go and boil your bottoms, you sons of silly persons!
          1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Who goes there?
          King Arthur: It is I, Arthur, son of Uther Pendragon, from the castle of Camelot. King of the Britons, defeater of the Saxons, Sovereign of all England!
          1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Pull the other one!
          King Arthur: I am, and this is my trusty servant Patsy. We have ridden the length and breadth of the land in search of knights who will join me in my court at Camelot. I must speak with your lord and master.
          1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: What? Ridden on a horse?
          King Arthur: Yes!
          1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: You’re using coconuts!
          King Arthur: What?
          1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: You’ve got two empty halves of coconut and you’re bangin’ ’em together.
          King Arthur: So? We have ridden since the snows of winter covered this land, through the kingdom of Mercia, through…
          1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Where’d you get the coconuts?
          King Arthur: We found them.
          1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Found them? In Mercia? The coconut’s tropical!
          King Arthur: What do you mean?
          1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Well, this is a temperate zone
          King Arthur: The swallow may fly south with the sun or the house martin or the plover may seek warmer climes in winter, yet these are not strangers to our land?
          1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?
          King Arthur: Not at all. They could be carried.
          1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: What? A swallow carrying a coconut?
          King Arthur: It could grip it by the husk!
          1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: It’s not a question of where he grips it! It’s a simple question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could not carry a one pound coconut.
          King Arthur: Well, it doesn’t matter. Will you go and tell your master that Arthur from the Court of Camelot is here?
          1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Listen. In order to maintain air-speed velocity, a swallow needs to beat its wings forty-three times every second, right?
          King Arthur: Please!
          1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Am I right?
          King Arthur: One, two, five!
          Sir Galahad: Three sir!
          King Arthur: THREE!
          Prince Herbert: But mother,
          King of Swamp Castle: Father, I’m father.
          Prince Herbert: But father…
          The Witch: I’m not a witch I’m not a witch!
          Sir Bedevere: But you are dressed as one
          The Witch: *They* dressed me up like this!
          Crowd: We didn’t! We didn’t…
          The Witch: And this isn’t my nose. It’s a false one.
          Sir Bedevere: [lifts up her false nose] Well?
          Peasant 1: Well, we did do the nose.
          Sir Bedevere: The nose?
          Peasant 1: And the hat, but she is a witch!
          Crowd: Yeah! Burn her! Burn her!
          Sir Bedevere: Did you dress her up like this?
          Peasant 1: No!
          Peasant 3, Peasant 2: No!
          Peasant 3: No!
          Peasant 1: No!
          Peasant 3, Peasant 2: No!
          Peasant 1: Yes!
          Peasant 2: Yes!
          Peasant 1: Yeah a bit.
          Peasant 3: A bit!
          Peasant 1, Peasant 2: A bit!
          Peasant 2: a bit
          Peasant 1: But she has got a wart!
          Random Person in the crowd: *cough* *cough*
          King Arthur: Old woman.
          Dennis: Man.
          King Arthur: Man, sorry. What knight lives in that castle over there?
          Dennis: I’m 37.
          King Arthur: What?
          Dennis: I’m 37. I’m not old.
          King Arthur: Well I can’t just call you “man”.
          Dennis: Well you could say “Dennis”.
          King Arthur: I didn’t know you were called Dennis.
          Dennis: Well you didn’t bother to find out did you?
          King Arthur: I did say sorry about the “old woman”, but from behind you looked…
          Dennis: What I object to is you automatically treat me like an inferior.
          King Arthur: Well I am king.
          Dennis: Oh, king eh? Very nice. And how’d you get that, eh? By exploiting the workers. By hanging on to outdated imperialist dogma which perpetuates the economic and social differences in our society.
          King Arthur: I am your king.
          Woman: Well I didn’t vote for you.
          King Arthur: You don’t vote for kings.
          Woman: Well how’d you become king then?
          [Angelic music plays… ]
          King Arthur: The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. THAT is why I am your king.
          Dennis: [interrupting] Listen, strange women lyin’ in ponds distributin’ swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.
          Dennis: Oh, but you can’t expect to wield supreme executive power just because some watery tart threw a sword at you.
          Dennis: Oh but if I went ’round sayin’ I was Emperor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me, they’d put me away.
          Dennis: Come and see the violence inherent in the system. Help! Help! I’m being repressed!
          King Arthur: Bloody peasant!
          Dennis: Oh, what a giveaway! Did you hear that? Did you hear that, eh? That’s what I’m on about! Did you see him repressing me? You saw him, Didn’t you?
          Sir Bedevere: …and that, my liege, is how we know the Earth to be banana shaped.
          King Arthur: This new learning amazes me, Sir Bedevere. Explain again how sheep’s bladders may be employed to prevent earthquakes.
          [the King gestures to the window]
          King of Swamp Castle: One day, lad, all this will be yours.
          Prince Herbert: What, the curtains?
          King of Swamp Castle: No, not the curtains, lad, all that you can see stretched out over the valleys and the hills! That’ll be your kingdom, lad.
          King of Swamp Castle: When I first came here, this was all swamp. Everyone said I was daft to build a castle on a swamp, but I built in all the same, just to show them. It sank into the swamp. So I built a second one. That sank into the swamp. So I built a third. That burned down, fell over, then sank into the swamp. But the fourth one stayed up. And that’s what you’re going to get, Lad, the strongest castle in all of England.
          Sir Lancelot: Look, my liege!
          [trumpets play a fanfare as the camera cuts briefly to the sight of a majestic castle]
          King Arthur: [in awe] Camelot!
          Sir Galahad: [in awe] Camelot!
          Sir Lancelot: [in awe] Camelot!
          Patsy: [derisively] It’s only a model!
          King Arthur: Shh!
          King Arthur: On second thought, let’s not go to Camelot. It is a silly place.
          1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?
          Bridgekeeper: Stop. Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.
          Sir Lancelot: Ask me the questions, bridgekeeper. I am not afraid.
          Bridgekeeper: What… is your name?
          Sir Lancelot: My name is Sir Lancelot of Camelot.
          Bridgekeeper: What… is your quest?
          Sir Lancelot: To seek the Holy Grail.
          Bridgekeeper: What… is your favourite colour?
          Sir Lancelot: Blue.
          Bridgekeeper: Go on. Off you go.
          Sir Lancelot: Oh, thank you. Thank you very much.
          Sir Robin: That’s easy.
          Bridgekeeper: Stop. Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.
          Sir Robin: Ask me the questions, bridgekeeper. I’m not afraid.
          Bridgekeeper: What… is your name?
          Sir Robin: Sir Robin of Camelot.
          Bridgekeeper: What… is your quest?
          Sir Robin: To seek the Holy Grail.
          Bridgekeeper: What… is the capital of Assyria?
          [pause]
          Sir Robin: I don’t know that.
          [he is thrown over the edge into the volcano]
          Sir Robin: Auuuuuuuugh.
          Bridgekeeper: Stop. What… is your name?
          Galahad: Sir Galahad of Camelot.
          Bridgekeeper: What… is your quest?
          Galahad: I seek the Grail.
          Bridgekeeper: What… is your favourite colour?
          Galahad: Blue. No, yel…
          [he is also thrown over the edge]
          Galahad: auuuuuuuugh.
          Bridgekeeper: Hee hee heh. Stop. What… is your name?
          King Arthur: It is ‘Arthur’, King of the Britons.
          Bridgekeeper: What… is your quest?
          King Arthur: To seek the Holy Grail.
          Bridgekeeper: What… is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?
          King Arthur: What do you mean? An African or European swallow?
          Bridgekeeper: Huh? I… I don’t know that.
          [he is thrown over]
          Bridgekeeper: Auuuuuuuugh.
          Sir Bedevere: How do know so much about swallows?
          King Arthur: Well, you have to know these things when you’re a king, you know.
          [the Black Knight continues to threaten Arthur despite getting both his arms and one of his legs cut off]
          Black Knight: Right, I’ll do you for that!
          King Arthur: You’ll what?
          Black Knight: Come here!
          King Arthur: What are you gonna do, bleed on me?
          Black Knight: I’m invincible!
          King Arthur: …You’re a loony.
          Dingo: You must spank her well, and after you are done with her, you may deal with her as you like… and then… spank me.
          All: And me. And me too. And me.
          Dingo: Yes. Yes, you must give us all a good spanking.
          Dingo: And after the spanking, the oral sex.
          Galahad: Well, I could stay a bit longer…
          Knight 1: We are the Knights who say… NI.
          Roger the Shrubber: Are you saying Ni to that old woman?
          King Arthur: Um, yes.
          Roger the Shrubber: Oh, what sad times are these when passing ruffians can say Ni at will to old ladies. There is a pestilence upon this land, nothing is sacred. Even those who arrange and design shrubberies are under considerable economic stress in this period in history.
          King Arthur: Did you say shrubberies?
          Roger the Shrubber: Yes, shrubberies are my trade. I am a shrubber. My name is Roger the Shrubber. I arrange, design, and sell shrubberies.
          Knight 1: We are now no longer the Knights who say Ni.
          Knight 2: NI.
          Other Knights: Shh…
          Knight 1: We are now the Knights who say…”Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-PTANG. Zoom-Boing. Z’nourrwringmm.
          King of Swamp Castle: We live in a bloody swamp. We need all the land we can get.
          Prince Herbert: But I don’t like her.
          King of Swamp Castle: Don’t like her? What’s wrong with her? She’s beautiful, she’s rich, she’s got huge… tracts of land.
          Tim: Follow. But. Follow only if ye be men of valour, for the entrance to this cave is guarded by a creature so foul, so cruel that no man yet has fought with it and lived. Bones of full fifty men lie strewn about its lair. So, brave knights, if you do doubt your courage or your strength, come no further, for death awaits you all with nasty, big, pointy teeth.
          King Arthur: What an eccentric performance.
          [Holding the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch]
          King Arthur: How does it… um… how does it work?
          Sir Lancelot: I know not, my liege.
          King Arthur: Consult the Book of Armaments.
          Brother Maynard: Armaments, chapter two, verses nine through twenty-one.
          Cleric: [reading] And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, “O Lord, bless this thy hand grenade, that with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy.” And the Lord did grin. And the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths, and carp and anchovies, and orangutans and breakfast cereals, and fruit-bats and large chu…
          Brother Maynard: Skip a bit, Brother…
          Cleric: And the Lord spake, saying, “First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it.
          Brother Maynard: Amen.
          All: Amen.
          King Arthur: Right. One… two… five.
          Galahad: Three, sir.
          King Arthur: Three.
          Sir Bedevere: Well, now, uh, Launcelot, Galahad, and I, wait until nightfall, and then leap out of the rabbit, taking the French by surprise – not only by surprise, but totally unarmed!
          The Dead Collector: Bring out yer dead.
          [a man puts a body on the cart]
          Large Man with Dead Body: Here’s one.
          The Dead Collector: That’ll be ninepence.
          The Dead Body That Claims It Isn’t: I’m not dead.
          The Dead Collector: What?
          Large Man with Dead Body: Nothing. There’s your ninepence.
          The Dead Body That Claims It Isn’t: I’m not dead.
          The Dead Collector: ‘Ere, he says he’s not dead.
          Large Man with Dead Body: Yes he is.
          The Dead Body That Claims It Isn’t: I’m not.
          The Dead Collector: He isn’t.
          Large Man with Dead Body: Well, he will be soon, he’s very ill.
          The Dead Body That Claims It Isn’t: I’m getting better.
          Large Man with Dead Body: No you’re not, you’ll be stone dead in a moment.
          The Dead Collector: Well, I can’t take him like that. It’s against regulations.
          The Dead Body That Claims It Isn’t: I don’t want to go on the cart.
          Large Man with Dead Body: Oh, don’t be such a baby.
          The Dead Collector: I can’t take him.
          The Dead Body That Claims It Isn’t: I feel fine.
          Large Man with Dead Body: Oh, do me a favor.
          The Dead Collector: I can’t.
          Large Man with Dead Body: Well, can you hang around for a couple of minutes? He won’t be long.
          The Dead Collector: I promised I’d be at the Robinsons’. They’ve lost nine today.
          Large Man with Dead Body: Well, when’s your next round?
          The Dead Collector: Thursday.
          The Dead Body That Claims It Isn’t: I think I’ll go for a walk.
          Large Man with Dead Body: You’re not fooling anyone, you know. Isn’t there anything you could do?
          The Dead Body That Claims It Isn’t: I feel happy. I feel happy.
          [the Dead Collector glances up and down the street furtively, then silences the Body with his a whack of his club]
          Large Man with Dead Body: Ah, thank you very much.
          The Dead Collector: Not at all. See you on Thursday.
          Large Man with Dead Body: Right.
          King Arthur: Can we come up and have a look?
          French Soldier: Of course not. You’re English types.
          King Arthur: What are you then?
          French Soldier: I’m French. Why do you think I have this outrageous accent, you silly king?
          Sir Galahad: What are you doing in England?
          French Soldier: Mind your own business.
          King of Swamp Castle: You only killed the bride’s father, you know.
          Sir Lancelot: Well, I didn’t mean to.
          King of Swamp Castle: Didn’t mean to? You put your sword right through his head.
          Sir Lancelot: Oh dear… is he all right?
          Guard: Who goes there?
          King Arthur: It is I, Arthur, Son of Uther Pendragon, from the castle of Camelot. King of the Britons, defeater of the Saxons, sovereign of all England.
          Guard: Pull the other one.
          Sir Bedevere: There are ways of telling whether she is a witch.
          Peasant 1: Are there? Oh well, tell us.
          Sir Bedevere: Tell me. What do you do with witches?
          Peasant 1: Burn them.
          Sir Bedevere: And what do you burn, apart from witches?
          Peasant 1: More witches.
          Peasant 2: Wood.
          Sir Bedevere: Good. Now, why do witches burn?
          Peasant 3: …because they’re made of… wood?
          Sir Bedevere: Good. So how do you tell whether she is made of wood?
          Peasant 1: Build a bridge out of her.
          Sir Bedevere: But can you not also build bridges out of stone?
          Peasant 1: Oh yeah.
          Sir Bedevere: Does wood sink in water?
          Peasant 1: No, no, it floats!… It floats! Throw her into the pond!
          Sir Bedevere: No, no. What else floats in water?
          Peasant 1: Bread.
          Peasant 2: Apples.
          Peasant 3: Very small rocks.
          Peasant 1: Cider.
          Peasant 2: Gravy.
          Peasant 3: Cherries.
          Peasant 1: Mud.
          Peasant 2: Churches.
          Peasant 3: Lead! Lead!
          King Arthur: A Duck.
          Sir Bedevere: …Exactly. So, logically…
          Peasant 1: If she weighed the same as a duck… she’s made of wood.
          Sir Bedevere: And therefore…
          Peasant 2: …A witch!
          Sir Galahad: What a strange person.
          Sir Galahad: Zoot!
          Dingo: No, I am Zoot’s identical twin sister, Dingo.
          [He tried to get past her]
          Dingo: Where are you going?
          Sir Galahad: I seek the Grail! I have seen it, here in this castle!
          Dingo: No, oh no! Bad, bad Zoot!
          Sir Galahad: What is it?
          Dingo: She has been setting a light to our beacon, which, I’ve just remembered, is Grail shaped. It’s not the first time we’ve had this problem.
          Sir Galahad: It’s not the real Grail?
          Dingo: Oh, wicked, bad, naught evil Zoot! Oh, she is a bad person, and she must pay the penalty!
          [Turns to camera]
          Dingo: Do you think this scene should have been cut? We were so worried when the boys were writing it, but now we’re glad! It’s better than some of the previous scenes I think.
          Left Head: Our was better visually.
          Dennis: Ours was committed, it wasn’t just a string of pussy jokes.
          Bridgekeeper: Get on with it.
          Tim: Yes! Get on with it!
          Army: Get on with it!
          Dingo: Oh, thank you, thank you!
          God: Get on with it!
          Sir Lancelot: [Bursts into the Prince’s room and kneels before him after killing the guards] Oh, fair one, behold, I am you humble servant Sir Launcelot. I have come to take
          [looks up and realizes that he is kneeling before an effeminate Prince, not a Princess]
          Sir Lancelot: Oh, I’m terribly sorry!
          Prince Herbert: You got my note!
          Sir Lancelot: Uh, well, I got a note.
          Prince Herbert: You’ve come to rescue me! I knew someone would! I knew that somewhere out there, there must be someone who
          [Music swells]
          King of Swamp Castle: Stop that! Stop it! Stop it!
          [Music stops]
          King of Swamp Castle: Who are you?
          Prince Herbert: I’m your son!
          King of Swamp Castle: No, not you!
          Sir Lancelot: I am Sir Launcelot, sir.
          Prince Herbert: He’s come to rescue me, father!
          Sir Lancelot: Well, let’s not jump to conclusions.
          King of Swamp Castle: Did you kill all those guards?
          Sir Lancelot: Um… oh, yes! Sorry.
          King of Swamp Castle: They cost fifty pounds each!
          Sir Lancelot: Well, the thing is, I thought your son was a lady.
          King of Swamp Castle: Well, I can understand that.
          Zoot: Welcome, brave sir Knight. Welcome to the Castle Anthrax.
          Sir Galahad: The Castle Anthrax?
          Zoot: Yes… it’s not a very good name, is it? Oh, but we are nice, and we’ll attend to your every need.
          [after slicing one of the Black Knight’s arms off]
          King Arthur: Now stand aside, worthy adversary.
          Black Knight: ‘Tis but a scratch.
          King Arthur: A scratch? Your arm’s off.
          Black Knight: No it isn’t.
          King Arthur: What’s that, then?
          Black Knight: [after a pause] I’ve had worse.
          King Arthur: You liar.
          Black Knight: Come on ya pansy.
          King Arthur: NI.
          Sir Bedevere: NOU.
          King Arthur: No, NI.
          Sir Bedevere: NOU.
          King Arthur: No No, NI… NI.
          Sir Bedevere: No,No,No,No… NI.
          Woman: Oh. How do you do?
          King Arthur: How do you do, good lady? I am Arthur, King of the Britons. Whose castle is that?
          Woman: King of the who?
          King Arthur: King of the Britons.
          Woman: Who are the Britons?
          King Arthur: Well, we all are. We are all Britons. And I am your king.
          Woman: I didn’t know we had a king. I thought we were an autonomous collective.
          Dennis: You’rw foolin’ yourself! We’re living in a dictatorship. A self-perpetuating autocracy in which the working class…
          Woman: Oh, there you go bringing class into it again.
          Dennis: Well, that’s what it’s all about! If only people would…
          King Arthur: Please, please, good people, I am in haste. Who lives in that castle?
          Woman: No one lives there.
          King Arthur: Then who is your lord?
          Woman: We don’t have a lord.
          Dennis: I told you, we’re an anarco-sydicalist commune. We take it in turns to be a sort of executive officer for the week…
          King Arthur: Yes…
          Dennis: …but all the decisions of that officer have to be ratified at a special bi-weekly meeting…
          King Arthur: Yes I see…
          Dennis: …by a simple majority in the case of purely internal affairs…
          King Arthur: Be quiet!
          Dennis: …but by a two thirds majority in the case of…
          King Arthur: Be quiet! I order you to be quiet!
          Woman: Order, eh? Who does he think he is?
          Sir Robin: Would it help to confuse it if we run away more?
          King Arthur: Oh shut up and go and change your armour.
          [King Arthur has just cut the Black Knight’s last leg off]
          Black Knight: Okay, we’ll call it a draw.
          King Arthur: [Preparing to leave] Come, Patsy.
          [King Arthur and Patsy ride off]
          Black Knight: [calling after King Arthur] Oh! Had enough, eh? Come back and take what’s coming to you, you yellow bastards! Come back here and take what’s coming to you! I’ll bite your legs off!
          King of Swamp Castle: Guards, make sure the prince doesn’t leave this room until I come and get him.
          Guard #1: Not to leave the room… even if you come and get him.
          Guard #2: [hiccups]
          King of Swamp Castle: No, no. *Until* I come and get him.
          Guard #1: Until you come and get him, we’re not to enter the room.
          King of Swamp Castle: No, no, no. You *stay* in the room, and make sure *he* doesn’t leave.
          Guard #1: And you’ll come and get him.
          Guard #2: [hiccups]
          King of Swamp Castle: Right.
          Guard #1: We don’t need to do anything, apart from just stop him entering the room.
          King of Swamp Castle: No, no. *Leaving* the room.
          Guard #1: Leaving the room, yes.
          King of Swamp Castle: All right?
          Guard #2: [hiccups]
          Guard #1: Right. Oh, if, if, if, uh, if, if, uh, if, if, if, we… oh, if… oh…
          King of Swamp Castle: Look, it’s quite simple. You just stay here, and make sure he doesn’t leave the room. All right?
          Guard #2: [hiccups]
          Guard #1: Oh, I remember, uh, can he leave the room with us?
          King of Swamp Castle: No, no, no, no, you just keep him in here, and make sure…
          Guard #1: Oh yeah, we’ll keep him in here, obviously, but if he had to leave, and we were with him…
          King of Swamp Castle: No, just keep him in here…
          Guard #1: Until you, or anyone else…
          King of Swamp Castle: No, not anyone else. Just me.
          Guard #1: Just you.
          Guard #2: [hiccups]
          King of Swamp Castle: Get back.
          Guard #1: Get back.
          King of Swamp Castle: All right?
          Guard #1: Right, we’ll stay here until you get back.
          King of Swamp Castle: And make sure he doesn’t leave.
          Guard #1: What?
          King of Swamp Castle: Make sure he doesn’t leave.
          Guard #1: The prince?
          King of Swamp Castle: Yes, make sure he doesn’t leave.
          Guard #1: Oh, yes, of course.
          [Points at Guard #2]
          Guard #1: I thought you meant him. You know, it seemed a bit daft me I were to guard him when he’s a guard.
          King of Swamp Castle: Is that clear?
          Guard #2: [hiccups]
          Guard #1: Oh, quite clear. No problems.
          King of Swamp Castle: Right.
          [King of Swamp Castle turns to leave the room, both guards follow him]
          King of Swamp Castle: Where are you going?
          Guard #1: We’re coming with you.
          King of Swamp Castle: No, no, no. I want you to stay here and make sure *he* doesn’t leave.
          Guard #1: Oh, I see. Right.
          King Arthur: Who are you who can summon fire without flint or tinder?
          Tim: There are some who call me… Tim.
          [Concorde has just been shot in the chest with an arrow bearing a message]
          Concorde: Message for you, sir.
          Tim: There he is!
          King Arthur: Where?
          Tim: There!
          King Arthur: What? Behind the rabbit?
          Tim: It *is* the rabbit!
          King Arthur: You silly sod!
          Tim: What?
          King Arthur: You got us all worked up!
          Tim: Well, that’s no ordinary rabbit.
          King Arthur: Ohh.
          Tim: That’s the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on!
          Sir Robin: You tit! I soiled my armor I was so scared!
          Tim: Look, that rabbit’s got a vicious streak a mile wide! It’s a killer!
          Sir Galahad: Get stuffed!
          Tim: He’ll do you up a treat, mate.
          Sir Galahad: Oh, yeah?
          Sir Robin: You manky Scots git!
          Tim: I’m warning you!
          Sir Robin: What’s he do? Nibble your bum?
          Tim: He’s got huge, sharp… er… He can leap about. Look at the bones!
          King Arthur: Go on, Bors. Chop his head off!
          Sir Bors: Right! Silly little bleeder. One rabbit stew comin’ right up!

          [after Bors is killed by the killer rabbit]

          Tim: I *warned* you, but did you listen to me? Oh, no, you *knew*, didn’t you? Oh, it’s just a harmless little *bunny*, isn’t it?

          King Arthur: Well, we’ll not risk another frontal assault. That rabbit’s dynamite.

      • #3283657

        I can’t believe

        by jdclyde ·

        In reply to Update-

        that “the toxic avenger” didn’t make your list! :0

        • #3209320

          The Toxic Avenger *IS* bad …

          by mickster269 ·

          In reply to I can’t believe

          But one of the guys coming has a whole library of “Tromaville” films.

          I have a feeling that Toxic Avenger will be there by default.

    • #3283654

      I can’t believe Killer Klowns didn’t make the lists

      by maxwell edison ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      .
      http://www.2spare.com/item_53984.aspx

      http://www.digitaldreamdoor.com/pages/movie-pages/movie_worst.html

      http://us.imdb.com/bottom_100_films/

      http://members.tripod.com/bigsketchbook2/id119.htm

      Oh well, I guess one person’s worst is another’s best. Go figure!

      http://movies.yahoo.com/mvc/dls?iid=7-1855817&lid=7-126197

      Edited to BLAST that Yahoo movie link.

      On second look, it lists Killer Klowns as BETTER than Apollo 13, one of the best movies of all time. Moreover, Apollo 13 WAS NOT a science-fiction movie. Whoever wrote that deserves my idiot link.

    • #3209265

      How about these two:

      by mickster269 ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      “Dick Tracy” or “From Justin to Kelly” ?

    • #3209169

      A lot depends upon what you define as ‘bad movies’

      by deadly ernest ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      Two movies that i think are funny, but others say are bad are:

      1. Rhubarb – about 30 minutes of various daily scenes where the only word said is Rhubarb, with differrent accents and emotional overtones. British naturally. I kill myself laughing every time I see it.

      2. The other is an extremely ‘cheesy’ D grade USA sci fi film called ‘Spaced Invaders’ these giant (that is 3 to 4 foot tall) insects are invading Earth by accident, they got lost. I frequently stop the movie to dash to the loo. Most people say it’s badly made and stupid movie. But I love the scene where the bugs come across a road, one starts across, speeding pick up hits him, he’s gone in a flash, they thinks its some sort of super laser defence field. Pick up pulls up at gas stop, gas jockey, says he’ll get the bug off the front of the car and gets a jimmy bar to do it. No one seems concerned about such a huge bug.

    • #3205628

      Mickster, how was the weekend?

      by leee ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      And what did everyone bring?

    • #3205564

      And the Winner (?) is ….

      by mickster269 ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      My final selection was “Battlefield Earth”. Who could forget Travolta in Dredlocks?

      It was a wonderful weekend weather wise. But the nights were terrifying – screams, crying, grown men begging for mercy… oh, the horror… the horror. “Bad Movies in the Backwoods” had been born.

      Once we had watched most of the movies (look, a grown man can only take so much), our final top 10 list came to this:

      10 xXx State of the Union (the sequel to a bad movie, no less.)

      9 Street Fighter (Van Damme is always to be a contender)

      8 Gigli. Need I say more?

      7 Duece Biglow European Gigolo To all of you who live in Europe- I persinally would like to apologize for all Americans for this movie being made. No wonder you guys hate us so much.

      6 Stop or my Mom Will Shoot – Just how bad did Stallone need the money?

      5 Gymkata. Men’s Gymnastics as a Martial Art?

      4 From Justin to Kelly

      3. Battlefield Earth.

      2. Freddy Got Fingered

      and…. Hold your breath (or your nose):

      1. Spice World. (I guess this was paybacks for the Duece Bigalow shot).

      I wish they made “Brain Clorox”.

      • #3205560

        You watched all of those? :0

        by jdclyde ·

        In reply to And the Winner (?) is ….

        Did you guys at least ff through parts of it?

        Oh man, I had completely forgotten how horrible Gymkata was! Here, I will spin round on this pole and you will slowly walk up one at a time in nice order so I can kick you all. AAAAAAAAA!

        I will count myself lucky that I have never seen half of these! B-)

        • #3205537

          Well, most of them-

          by mickster269 ·

          In reply to You watched all of those? :0

          Some, enough of us had seem they were voted in by default. Battlefield Earth, Stop or my Mom will shoot, and Street Fighter made the list without having to see more than the first 20 minutes.

        • #3205533

          Most of my sympathy

          by jdclyde ·

          In reply to Well, most of them-

          was just extracted! :p

          Here I thought you had to suffer through cover to cover each and every one of those! :0

          THAT is cheating!

          Street fighter, huh? Surprised my boys never asked to rent that one…..

        • #3205523

          OK, Big Guy! I double dog dare you-

          by mickster269 ·

          In reply to Most of my sympathy

          We did the list alphabetically, btw.

          YOU watch “Freddy Got Fingered”,
          “Gigli”, and “Gymkata” back to back, and tell ME where your threshold for pain lies.

          Try waking up to “The Spice Girls” at 8 am on a sunday morning.

          By the time we got to “xXx State of the Union” we were begging for the sweet release that only death could bring our minds.

        • #3205518

          Oh, I so don’t think so!

          by jdclyde ·

          In reply to OK, Big Guy! I double dog dare you-

          But that WOULD qualify as a whole new level of pain and suffering!

          Was your posting of the top ten in alpha or was that in order of the worst of the worst?

        • #3205506

          Weenie.

          by mickster269 ·

          In reply to Oh, I so don’t think so!

          It was the worst of the worst.

          Oh, and there is nothing as horrid as having a “Spice Girls” earwig in your head all day long.

        • #3205517

          stomach remedies

          by storch ·

          In reply to OK, Big Guy! I double dog dare you-

          I am curious. Did you folks have a supply of stomach relief medications like Alka-Seltzer, Pepto-Bismo, and the like? Seems to me you would have needed it between the films and the alcohol.

          High puke factor there! I hope your poor stomaches got through it OK.

      • #3205554

        They do

        by tig2 ·

        In reply to And the Winner (?) is ….

        It’s called alcohol.

        Apply VERY liberally as soon as humanly possible.

      • #3205543

        Oh god…

        by jmgarvin ·

        In reply to And the Winner (?) is ….

        After watching those movies you’ll need to pull out the brain bleach. I think you might have killed a few too many brain cells with all those movies at once!

        • #3205536

          Hmm… Maybe we should re-think our treatment of our War Prisoners..

          by mickster269 ·

          In reply to Oh god…

          And play this list of movies non-stop, 24/7.

          Until Amnesty International gets wind of it.

        • #3205530

          Actually

          by jdclyde ·

          In reply to Hmm… Maybe we should re-think our treatment of our War Prisoners..

          something like steal magnolias or fried green tomatos or even thelma and louise.

          THAT would be torture! Inhumane!

        • #3205507

          bwaaaah, vor true torture – ve haft ze parliamentary recordings

          by deadly ernest ·

          In reply to Hmm… Maybe we should re-think our treatment of our War Prisoners..

          not se question time, but 200 hours of general discussion of bills will turn anyvone into ze brainless zombie.

        • #3282472

          Royal commissions

          by jamesrl ·

          In reply to bwaaaah, vor true torture – ve haft ze parliamentary recordings

          I’ve sat through many question periods, a few budget debates and other sessions, live and in person. They can be somewhat interesting depending on your level of understanding and interest.

          But even the strongest constitution has a hard time surviving a multi year Royal commission. These are inquiries into special subjects. There may be the occasional interesting witness, but for the most part its a long slow painful experience.

          James

        • #3282285

          Thanks James, I forgot about them

          by deadly ernest ·

          In reply to Royal commissions

          They’re as bad as listening to a politician open a building or bridge in an election year. After a minute you need a dental drill hitting nerve to stay awake.

      • #3282509

        That means you LIKED…

        by dmambo ·

        In reply to And the Winner (?) is ….

        Gawd, I don’t even want to go through the list of the art films you guys rated higher than your Bottom 10.

        Just reading your list makes me want to puke.

        Can I go along next year? 😀

    • #3205512

      tags?

      by jdclyde ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      Hold on there partner! I just noticed I am in your tags with the entertainment and bad movies?

      Does that make me bad entertainment? :0

      • #3205505

        And how long has this thread been up?

        by mickster269 ·

        In reply to tags?

        I figured if I put your name in with “Bad Home Movies” , I’d be sure to get some people stopping by.

    • #3282411

      One more to add

      by protiusx ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      I must say that I like Will Farrell but Taladega Nights (The ballad of Ricky Bobby) was STUPID! It could have been funny and there were some parts that did make me chuckle but it never quite made the mark. Two thumbs down.

      • #3282378

        Will Farrell

        by jdclyde ·

        In reply to One more to add

        is just a Chase wanna-be. It never seems natural or convincing. Like he is trying too hard to be natural and I don’t “buy him” in any of his rolls.

        I have yet to see a Farrell movie I really enjoyed.

        • #3284762

          Elf

          by dmambo ·

          In reply to Will Farrell

          It was a nice little Christmas movie (that from someone who hates the Christmas season!).

          I think Bob Newhart stole the show.

        • #3284681

          If you say so Mambo

          by jdclyde ·

          In reply to Elf

          I will give that one a check (when the season comes). I had no desire to ever view it, as I find Will more annoying than amusing in just about every case.

          “Hi! I’m Larry and this is my brother Darrel and my other brother darrel”.

          I loved the time they shoveled in his driveway in protest, so he turned the hose on them. I sure miss shows with some thought put into them. 🙁

        • #3284938

          Agree Completely!

          by tig2 ·

          In reply to Elf

          And I thought that Will Farrell was perfect for the part.

          But you’re right, Mambo. Bob Newhart was great!

        • #3284929

          That’s right!

          by maecuff ·

          In reply to Elf

          You’re the Christmas Scrooge. And it’s just around the corner!

          True about Bob Newhart, he’s just a funny guy.

        • #3283613

          I have to admit

          by protiusx ·

          In reply to Elf

          Elf was a good movie. It was Will Farrell funny and a good family movie.
          I like Will Farrell don’t get me wrong. Especially when he did the BOC skit on SNL. That was hysterical! More cow bell!

        • #3283251

          I love

          by maecuff ·

          In reply to I have to admit

          the Celebrity Jeapordy skits..

        • #3283099

          Those are hilarious!

          by protiusx ·

          In reply to I love

          I have quite a few of them on MP3. I love “the pen is mightier” LOL!

        • #3283034

          Norm Mcdonald

          by maecuff ·

          In reply to Those are hilarious!

          as Burt Reynolds is absolute genious and Darrel Hammond as Sean Connery is one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen… my favorite? Alex telling them to just write down SOMETHING they like for Final Jeopardy. Sean Connery writes ‘Alex Trebek’ and Alex is touched..Now..how much did he wager? Sucks.

        • #3200131

          Final Jeopardy – Name a Food

          by dmambo ·

          In reply to Those are hilarious!

          Connery writes “Miso”

          Trebek is happy that Connery knew a type of Japanese soup seasoning.

          The wager?…”Horny”

    • #3282397

      Wish I’d have read this earlier…

      by jck ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      I can tell you good ones…

      Alien Blood

      Attack of the Killer Tomatoes

      Blair Witch Project 2

      oh man…bad movies…my specialty

    • #3282373

      Santa Claus Conquers the Martians …

      by too old for it ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      or …

      Plan 9 from Outer Space

      Reefer Madness

      Killer Klowns From Outer Space

      anything with Barbara Steisand in it

      • #3282369

        One exception to the Streisand comment

        by jdclyde ·

        In reply to Santa Claus Conquers the Martians …

        She was GREAT on South Park! 😀

        • #3282346

          Any time she opens her mouth to sing …

          by too old for it ·

          In reply to One exception to the Streisand comment

          … especially “People”, I head for the barf bag.

        • #3282337

          Did you see the SP episode?

          by jdclyde ·

          In reply to Any time she opens her mouth to sing …

          The kids are chained up, and to make them talk, she starts to “sing”. The horror, the horror…. :0

          Also, another side note, did you see South Park, the movie? Near the end, cartman has the malfunctioning “V chip” that SENDS an electric shock when he swears instead of him getting shocked? He does a long list of swear words to build up a big charge to get Saddam with, and the last swear word he says is “Barbara Streisand”!

          Wayyy too funny! 😀

    • #3283542

      Hum some really great bad movies

      by zlitocook ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      I love bad movies, I have a big collection of them. Let me know what you like and I will send you a great selection of movies.
      We have a bad movie night every month and it is a great way to have fun.

    • #3283100

      Sleepwalkers

      by tink! ·

      In reply to Need some help- REALLY Bad Movies.

      One of the silliest Stephen King movies.
      He does make his traditional cameo in it too.

      • #3283016

        cameo

        by jdclyde ·

        In reply to Sleepwalkers

        but this has to be his single worst job he has ever done in front of the camera. Easily.

        The shots of the mother/son sex I could have done without…… ewwwwwww!

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