should this be concidered?

eh? Do you mean a flame war? Or actual physical contact?

All she has to do is report him, then ignore him. I've had a couple of "come on's" but nothing nasty - I ignore the first one they send, then if a second arrives I get onto the staff here.

The peer contact system works for me. Through it, I know where NeilB and SG work, so the next time I'm in London I can hook up with SG. (Cos Neil tends to stand people up.........I love the way I can keep bringing that one back to haunt him!)

The problem I have with NOT having peer mail is that I wouldn't be able to give specific help to those peers that mail me directly. As a direct result of me asking him to pm me, one person actually stopped his manager from a) destroying evidence and b) making himself tribunal fodder.

These are things I can't put on the board - professional conduct and all that - and the legal side would have no bearing to anyone outside the UK or EU anyway. It would just be overkill to others, whilst to Brits, it's the difference between doing things right, or contravening the law, even if unwittingly.

So, Jaq, to me - yes, it would be a major issue.

GG

it would be fun to play with him over this stupidity.

but oaw has said she is going to do the right thing and talk to tr staff about it.

editing to add:

and the public embarassment factor would be there to warn all members that inapropriate use of peer contact isn't acceptable.

And here I was wondering whether the french maid uniform was a tad bit too long :p

And nope, I havent got the duck yet. I am still waiting, tapping my foot, for someone to let me on the joke ... :D

]:)

~Or maybe i shouldnt have said that in public.~

And yeah it was too long. Hang in there love you will learn the mystery of the duck yet and it will probably blow you away. Hmmmmm? Could be a DE in there somewhere. There is, if you want there to be and wish to take it that way, you naughty wee thing, you.

[b]Dawg[/b] ]:)

From what I have seen, "oaw" is the type of person to fire a shot and then run, fast.

(no, I am not the one peering her!)

She has a proven victom complex and does take offense at the slightest thing. Notice her friend list is constantly trimmed AND the people that consider her a contact is dwindling just as quickly.

There is a reason for this.

Given the anonymity built into the site, a flame war in the discussions forum would probably not lead to a pest running and hiding. It would just give him the attention he craves. We've seen it before with others. They love to be at the center of it.

And I personally like the PM feature. Though truthfully, when I use it, I generally change my address in my profile to my Yahoo account in case I end up corresponding with some weirdo by accident.

(I've forgotten to do that in the past, and there are some weirdos who know my personal info) :)

I didn't say anything. I was just asking for an interpretation of what you said. :D

And I do agree that people shouldn't be bothered with peer mail for something they might say in the Discussions. Maybe an option would be to have something like a IM friend list consisting only of people you do want to get messages from. It's not a perfect solution because it limits the legitimate professionally-oriented peer mails that we may occasionally get but it's better than nothing. I guess the best solution is to just ignore any nonsensical, immature peer mails that might float one's way. If you don't respond, the antagonist won't even have a clue as to whether it was received or not. That really bugs people who intend to antagonize someone.

add that to the list, but resisted the temptation (this time).

MARK has been a baaaaaaAAAAAAD boy! :D

By the way, Jaqui, for two years I thought you were a girl because you use a girl's name for your alias, and that is most likely why you received emails that were come-ons.

Changing your alias to "Jaques" would save a lot of confusion.

I don't think the peer message facility should be removed. I have found it most useful for exchanging both personal and technical information.

I have never encountered such violent rage as OAW has expressed, with no real provocation, on this or any other website where I exchange personal messages -- and this is over a period of 3 1/2 years.

Don't let's do away with a useful facility just because one very disturbed woman hates men, can't accept even mild criticism, and, well, is not worth giving a second thought to.

if one of the regulars/good guys - i.e. Insiders (us!) posts the thread, we can make sure the name of the miscreant is in the thread title -

e.g.

XXXXX is peer messaging wanting a fight - anyone for fisticuffs?

or something along those lines.

Having his name in the thread should disturb him a little, and most people on here would probably post up what they thought of a person like that.

If he replies, and tries to justify what he's done, we just ignore him to the point that he just....sorta....goes away. We ignore all his posts. No matter which topic they are on, or which thread they are in.

This is assuming, of course, that Jay and Smorty let him live in the first place, of course..... :D

Could be fun. Hey, I could use my "why use one word when ten sound so much better" rule.... :p

]:)

GG

as peer mail do can help out in certain situations to help one-an-other.

So to me: [b]let peer contacts be.[b] :0
[i]the rightway ofcourse. :) [/i]

Rob

Jardinier and OAW; OAW and Jardinier. That pretty much says it all. . :( X-(

The trick here is which one is the greater irritant. OAW is a little too sachariny most times for my liking and has made no real contribution to TR. Jardinier on the other hand has often made me wonder if he has both oars in the water but has accumulated 10K points in Q&A so he has, inarguably, made some sort of contribution to TR.

If it were a matter of TR keeping one or the other, I would say retain Jardinier for whatever further technical contributions he may make, always bearing in mind, of course, that morally, he is still a few fries short of a "Happy Meal."

OAW has made no technical contributions whatsoever and in her advanced state of decrepitude is ever likely to acquire the knowledge or skills to do so. Frankly I think she sometimes forgets where the "on" switch is located and she is a bit of a troll. Everybody's "honey bunny" until someone questions her sanity and then she's gone. I say let her stay gone.

Frankly, it would be no great loss if both were dropped at least we wouldn't be getting surprised by overly hirsute images of underaged teenagers from one at weird times, nor would you feel an acute need for a shot of insulin after reading the posts of the other.

In the words of the immortal Yogi, Berra that is, "I calls 'em as I sees 'em" and thats the way I see it.

The [b]Dawg[/b] has spoken; now talk to the hand. ;)

[b]Dawg[/b] ]:)

I don't use it too often, at least to contact other peers myself (although I have an occasion). I've had quite a few peers contact me, usually to say something nice or supportive, and I always reply. In some cases, the dialogue continues "off site" for one reason or other. Personally, I like the fact that many have contacted me through the peer contact, so I wouldn't want it discontinued.

You didn't indicate how oaw initially replied, but I would suggest to oaw that she simply tell the guy who was [i]"trying to get her to fight him"[/i] to simply bug-off and not contact her again. For her to reply [i]"Leave me alone and don't send me another email"[/i] should be clear enough. If it continues, I'd suggest that she send an email to the TR staff and ask that he be told to stop and/or have his account cancelled. They'll contact him, and it'll stop.

As far as posting the emails in a discussion forum, I'd say that anything's fair-game. If someone sends an email to another, there's certainly no presumption (or guarantee) of privacy, or there shouldn't be, and there's no telling what the recipient might do with it. It may or may not be in good-taste to post them into a discussion, but depending on the email and the circumstances, it could certainly be warranted.

As a somewhat related side-note, there's a local talk-radio host who will, on occasion, read some of the flame emails he gets from listeners on the air. He'll use their names and everything, and literally rip them a new one as he dissects the email. I'd bet a dollar to dirt that not one of those folks ever sends him a second one!

It's true that sometimes it is fun to verbally bash someone in the mouth, but often these things seem to go on for days. There are certainly some interesting and fun intelligent debates, but when it's a case like Not An Underage or another pipsqueak, I say why bother. It's not worth the aggravation. It's the name-calling tirades that make me scratch my head and wonder. So many people get off by getting the last word in. Pointless.

BTW - if I had your rep, I would never use the phrase "back side" in any post title. :D

I'll be sure to keep an eye on Posts From My Contacts to see if you let loose. While I don't find myself drawn to posting to give someone a well-deserved kick in the ass, I do enjoy reading them on occasions.

The only reason 1AW became such a high-runner is due to the typical alpha-male behavior from some of our peers. She comes out all cutsey, and a handful of the regulars can't resist flirting. We created the monster, we must destroy it.

I say give me a real woman like GG, ITGirli or Sttargazer any day. (Figuratively, of course)

From everything I have seen here, full steam ahead is the course to follow.

Anytime you allow personal contacts between members, there will always be questionable messages.

From the SPAM,
to the come-ons (~sniff~ no one ever comes on to me.....)
to the abusive or stupid contacts.

If you have an issue, you are an adult, playing on a site meant for adults. Handle it like an adult.

Methods are, flame back, ignore, post on TR for the public humiliation factor, or report to TR.

Sounds like a good system, with a good way to resolve all but the LOBO issues.

I see at the WORST, a "please refrain" message to Julian as the resolution to this non-issue.

Your benificiary is not stable, and will repeatedly be offended. She will have to learn to deal with it like an adult or find somewhere else to play.

I DO think it would be fair for her to get a chance to present her side to the members, just as Julian has, IF SHE WANTS TO.

I don't think that will happen though.

I'm not going to email oaw anything, because you're right, it might get me banished from TR. If I say one thing, she'll probably read something totally different and find a reason to be offended and complain. I'm already on her s*** list (not that I care, mind you); but just like the plague, she's a good one to avoid.

I will admit, however, that at first she just seemed like a nice person. But as time went on, she became too nice, if you know what I mean. That kind of touchy-feely, mamby-pamby, hugs-and-kisses kind of person is just weird to me. It just gives me the creeps! And the way she got SO offended when I pressed her for an explanation in a discussion, it almost made her appear imbalanced. Weird, strange, creepy, and all those words are the ones that come to mind. So no thanks. I think I'll just walk on the other side of the street pretending not to see.

By the way, why would YOU get banished from TR? Was it YOU that sent her the email challenging her to a "fight"? (A "verbal bout", I suspect.) She wouldn't stand a chance against you, Julian.

she is NOT walking the walk, so she is blessing the world! B-)

How could I have missed that part before? :^0

She isn't running away, she is blessing the world! How noble! ;\

Side note: I think it was my "What he is trying to say" post that knocked me off her contact list once and for all. Oh well.

"No shweat off my thack!" - Chip Douglas

and a virtual knuckle sandwich was very much on the agenda. Aren't we all lucky that I'm just so NICE otherwise I could have got a little miffed?

I wonder who she's mailed about me...

Jules, if it comes down to it, I'll hold your coat. You might be completely barking sometimes but at least we have a bit of fun.

Neil :D

always everyones best friend (to their face) always smiling (but the smile NEVER reaches the eyes) and is always talking but never says anything.

People that are enjoying her self proclamed ditziness, help yourself. I personally have no use for someone that has shown herself to be as mentally unstable as 1UNaw.

When she started running her mouth in the political dicussions but refused to answer even the simplest questions about her post, she gave many more of a glimps at what she is really like behind the mask than she meant to. I didn't like what I saw.

By that I meant that I have never been employed in any kind of IT related industry.

My websites are all non-profit, and the only money I have earned from IT was from selling refurbished computers and doing a bit of tuition and tech support. So yes, I am quite involved in IT, but only as a hobby, never as a serious source of income.

I'm not the one who sent the invitation.

However I do deem it an honour and a privilege in the circumstances. :)

we created this monster. Male geeks in particular are suseptible to the wily charms of females, especially the superficial first impressions. Dawg, you are doing the dirty work for all of us. Thanks, and enjoy.

BTW - nice av.

https://www.techrepublic.com.com/5208-11189-0.html?forumID=8&threadID=194087
How do search engines work?

It probably should have been listed under "General Technology" instead.

So it was a serious tech discussion, until 1UNaw came and added nothing. Not that I haven't done the same thing once or twice myself.... ;\ Hijack? ME? B-)

But only to keep a particular issue private. I forget what the previous incarnation was (before being called PM), but I used that once, too.

I'd probably use it more if I had the time I used to have, when I was more involved in these discussions, too.