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Yuk Yuk?

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The new supermarket near my house has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh. Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain.

When you approach the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and witness the scent of fresh hay.

When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying.

The veggie department features the smell of fresh buttered corn.

I don't buy toilet paper there any more.

13 replies

by jdclyde

you will find a way to get back, one way or another! There is no escape now!

BAWAAAHAAAHHAHAHAHHAAAHAAAHAHHAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

by nicknielsen

My son likes to pop. It drives me nuts.

My new home PC has a 15-watt 2.1 sound system. I'm going to put in earplugs, turn the volume all the way up, then pop a sheet or two in manic mode. ]:)

Edit: I posted it and I still got confused when I read it. :|

by jdclyde

They are at their female-parental-units place this week, and hopefully it will have the same effect on her! :D

by jdclyde

An old country preacher had a teenage son, and it was getting time the boy should give some thought to choosing a profession. Like many young men, the boy didn't really know what he wanted to do, and he didn't seem too concerned about it.

One day, while the boy was away at school, his father decided to try an experiment. He went into the boy's room and placed on his study table three objects: a Bible, a silver dollar, and a bottle of whisky.

"I'll just hide behind the door," the old preacher said to himself, "and when he comes home from school this afternoon, I'll see which object he picks up. If it's the Bible, he's going to be a preacher like me, and what a blessing that would be! If he picks up the dollar, he's going to be a businessman, and that would be okay, too. But if he picks! up the bottle, he's going to be a no-good drunkard, and, Lord, what a shame that would be."

The old man waited anxiously, and soon heard his son's footsteps as he entered the house whistling and headed for his room. He tossed his books on the bed, and as he turned to leave the room he spotted the objects on the table. With curiosity in his eye, he walked over to inspect them.

Finally, he picked up the Bible and placed it under his arm. He picked up the silver dollar and dropped it into his pocket. He uncorked the bottle and took a big drink.

"Lord have mercy," the old man whispered, "he's gonna be a Congressman!"

by heml0ck

A father and son went fishing one day. After a couple hours out in the
boat, the boy suddenly became curious about the world around him. He
asked his father, "How does this boat float?"

The father thought for a moment, then replied, "Don't rightly know,
son."

The boy returned to his contemplation, then turned back to his father,
"How do fish breath underwater?"

Once again the father replied, "Don't rightly know, son."

A little later the boy asked his father, "Why is the sky blue?"

Again, the father replied. "Don't rightly know, son."

Worried he was going to annoy his father, he says, "Dad, do you mind my
asking you all of these questions?"

"Of course not son. If you don't ask questions, you'll never learn
anything!"

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