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After Hours

The IT workers of Star Trek

By Jessica Learish September 25, 2017, 4:50 PM PDT

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The IT workers of Star Trek

Captain, did you remove the USB drive without ejecting again?

Paramount Television

Captain, did you remove the USB drive without ejecting again?

Yes, that’s still what that little blue thing is.

The new series Star Trek: Discovery is on CBS All Access. For more details, check out our Star Trek: Discovery viewer’s guide.

Disclaimer: Both Star Trek: Discovery and TechRepublic are properties of CBS.

Paramount Television
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The IT workers of Star Trek

No, it's not a paper jam

Paramount Pictures

No, it's not a paper jam

We haven’t used paper in over 100 years.

Paramount Pictures
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The IT workers of Star Trek

Thanks for calling Starfleet. How can I help you?

CBS

Thanks for calling Starfleet. How can I help you?

You changed your tricorder language to Klingon? Again?

CBS
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The IT workers of Star Trek

Yes, your coms are being received

Paramount Pictures

Yes, your coms are being received

He’s just ignoring you.

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The IT workers of Star Trek

Do you know what he asked me?

Paramount Pictures

Do you know what he asked me?

He asked me if the new version of OSX would allow us to transport at warp speed.

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The IT workers of Star Trek

Yes, the food replicator is working just fine

Paramount Television

Yes, the food replicator is working just fine

But then again, I’m security, so, maybe it isn’t.

Paramount Television
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The IT workers of Star Trek

There are tribbles reproducing in the transporter room?

Paramount Pictures

There are tribbles reproducing in the transporter room?

Well I can’t imagine why that would be an enormous problem.

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The IT workers of Star Trek

Sir, I think the Starfleet Twitter has been hacked again

Paramount Television

Sir, I think the Starfleet Twitter has been hacked again

Someone is tweeting about a Ferengi escort service.

Paramount Television
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The IT workers of Star Trek

No, this isn't Scotty...

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No, this isn't Scotty...

And I’m afraid we can’t beam you into the transporter from 16 lightyears away.

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The IT workers of Star Trek

Just a few more security questions before we can access your account

CBS

Just a few more security questions before we can access your account

What are the galactic coordinates of your home planet?

CBS
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The IT workers of Star Trek

You're stuck in the turbolift?

CBS

You're stuck in the turbolift?

Did you try selecting a destination?

CBS
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The IT workers of Star Trek

Your tractor beam is malfunctioning?

CBS

Your tractor beam is malfunctioning?

Ma’am, I think you’re looking at the control panel upside down.

CBS
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The IT workers of Star Trek

On the phone with a Vulcan

CBS

On the phone with a Vulcan

He told me my tech support advice was highly illogical.

CBS
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The IT workers of Star Trek

Yes, you're welcome

Paramount Pictures

Yes, you're welcome

You live long and prosp —- great, he hung up.

Also see

  • Gallery: The greatest Star Trek laptop stickers of all time (TechRepublic)
  • Gallery: These are the greatest Star Trek T-shirts of all time (TechRepublic)
  • Star Trek captains offer 4 leadership lessons that could save your career (TechRepublic)
  • Star Trek technology in real life: Tricorder, tractor beam, and phaser (TechRepublic)
  • Tech leaders share how Star Trek inspired them to pursue a career in technology (TechRepublic)
  • Star Trek: Discovery continues the mission of futurism and bold social commentary (ZDNet)
  • ‘Star Trek: Discovery’ fights for more than Trekkies’ hearts (CNET)
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