IT Employment

General discussion


Counter offer conundrum

By sjohnson175 ·

So, I now may face this situation. Yes, I'm new on Tech Rep.

I have been miserable since August of 2004 and started looking "for real" that December.

I resigned yesterday for a new position and got a verbal counter from my current boss. I turned that down.

However, this morning a former boss I used to hold in the highest regard (more on that in a bit) spent an hour with me this morning asking if "anything could be done" because "I'm too valuable to lose". I took that opportunity to unload (professionally of course) about what really needs to change to make me happy (money is only a tiny part of it).

He said he was going to "ponder" my issues.

Now, about why I lost respect for this person. A co-worker who is unhappy as me went to him in confidenct for a reference. The former boss agrees then proceeds to tell the owner and board of directors (this person is a Senior VP) about my co-worker's request.

Word has leaked back to the co-worker that he may be a target for firing over the request.

Should I even consider a counter if they put it in writing or just keep running?

This conversation is currently closed to new comments.

Thread display: Collapse - | Expand +

All Comments

Collapse -

A different take

by JamesRL In reply to Counter offer conundrum

Your coworker asked your former boss to put their friendship over his career. You put them in a conflict of interest. The boss may have been conflicted, but felt that if anyone found out that he knew an employee was leaving and did nothing, he would be in trouble.

You don't ask your current employer for a reference - ever. You don't put people on the spot.

If your problems with the company are around issues other than money, don't consider the counter offer. They can honestly promise all the change you ask for, but changing the culture of an organization is very difficult, and very often fails.

I hope you were constructive in your "unloading". If your new opportunity doesn't work out, and that does sometimes happen, you need references and your former boss may be one of them. Last impressions can be even more powerful than first ones - if you come across as greedy, negative or a whiner, thats not the kind of reference you want.

No matter what happens, learn from this experience.


Collapse -

Good point on the former boss.

by sjohnson175 In reply to A different take

I would have made the same request. A company asked my co-worker for a managerial reference and that's the only person he doesn't report to he felt on good terms with. This co-worker and I worked together at our past company and neither of us would go to the boss there for a ref.

I can understand the conflict of interest but he should have said that up front rather than agree to the confidence then break it.

I have been very constructive and professional in my critique. My current boss has already offered to be a reference and even said he'd consider taking me back if this new sitation doesn't make me happy.

Collapse -


by jkaras In reply to Counter offer conundrum

If you feel that it is a hostile environment that wont change and the monitary compensation isnt going to make the troubles go away then get another job.

I dont think the manager acted inappropriately by informing the upper crust. He/she needs to prepare for the loss and replacement of workers. Maybe he has a good idea to save people by condensing departments or plans for expanding. Rumors are just that rumors. Are their truths to some? Yeah, but he didnt do anything dirty, trust me I have witnessed some really dirty tactics during notice time. Times are tough and employers know this getting more IT for their buck. DO you have something good lined up? My advice is find something else then bail and move into a better environment. Take the extra cash find where you will be happy at your leisure. You can weigh vacation, pay, perks, and location, it all comes down to happiness in the end. Cook your egg, not your goose.

Collapse -

My own experience

by stress junkie In reply to Counter offer conundrum

Years ago I was in a similar situation. I didn't like where I was working. I had been offered another job. My boss make an excellent counter offer. I accepted the counter offer.

Once the chance of going to the new job was lost things started to fall apart. Over the next six months almost all of the conditions that I had accepted to remain at the old job fell apart.

If you want to leave then leave. I recommend that you disregard counter offers.

Collapse -

I agree

by Dr Dij In reply to My own experience

From what I've read, of people who accept counter offers, 60% are not still there in 6 months.

Management looks as you in a new light as someone who has already stated they want to leave and may secretly look for your replacement for just that reason. This same process occurs if you tell mgmt you will leave if you don't get a raise. You can ask for a raise but don't tell them you'd leave if you don't get it.

Collapse -

Importance of money

by Skidoggeruk In reply to Counter offer conundrum

The most important thing about working is job satisfaction. If you are unhappy when you leave at the end of the day, you will be just as unhappy next week/month/year. Somebody once said to me that moving for money was not the right reason for moving ever.

I always feel guilty/odd/worried/etc when moving jobs. But usually by the time I "get serious" and look "for real" it is all over with already, in my head. Don't consider a counter offer, as you have already made your decision. Please don't be swayed by whatever these people say NOW, think about why you wanted to leave THEN. Do you REALLY think any of that will change? If you were unhappy then, you will probably be unhappy later AND you will have missed that opportunity. (and possibly some reputation, as you have now reneged on your word to new employer(possibly, employment agency). What do you suppose they might think should you come looking for a job in 6 months time?)This way you leave with your dignity, integrity and self-respect intact.

All easily said, good luck in whichever course you may decide.

Collapse -

Were this anything other than a sub-200 employee

by sjohnson175 In reply to Importance of money

family-owned business I'd say there was no way things will change.

However, it seems this company is as set in its ways as any megacorp.

I've now leared from an employee who lives next to a recruiter I worked with that the same recruiter has a dozen people from the company who have interviewd with him looking for a new position. That's a third of our technical staff alone. Then the same employee knows others actively looking but not with his recruiter neighbor.

The writing on the wall couldn't be any bolder.

Collapse -

there ya go then

by Skidoggeruk In reply to Were this anything other ...

It would appear that you are not alone.

Make your move and don't regret leaving a company that others are also going to leave. Open some new doors and try to enjoy what you are doing, instead of hating yourself for taking the money and doing the same-same as before.

Good Luck

Collapse -

Don't Take the Counter, But Use It

by DMambo In reply to Counter offer conundrum

As others have said, taking a counter offer is dangerous. But maybe you can use it as leverage to sweeten the deal at the new Co. Ask to maintain parity on vacation time as with the job you're leaving. Ask thenm to duplicate whatever conditions you currently find favorable. If they decline your request, you're not out anything (unless they feel you are holding them over a barrel just by asking).

Collapse -

Can't play that game.

by sjohnson175 In reply to Don't Take the Counter, B ...

This is a 6 month contract-to-perm position so I don't want to sour the future negotiations.

Related Discussions

Related Forums