General discussion

  • Creator
  • #2171159

    Friday Yuk (Sept 7)


    by slayer_ ·

    [b]Wife vs Girlfriend[/b]

    Wife is like a TV
    Girlfriend is like a mobile

    At home you watch TV
    but when you go out you take your mobile

    No money, you keep your old TV
    got money, you change your mobile

    Sometimes you enjoy TV
    but most of the time you play with your mobile

    TV is free for life
    but for the mobile, if you don’t pay, services will be terminated

    TV is big and bulky
    mobile is cute, slim, curvy and very portable

    Operational costs for TV is minimal
    but for the mobile it is often high and demanding

    Most importantly, mobile is a two-way communication ( you talk and listen )
    but with the TV you must only listen ( whether you like it or not )

    but always remember…..

    TV’s don’t have viruses
    mobiles often do…

All Comments

  • Author
    • #2887388

      What, no one posted?

      by slayer_ ·

      In reply to Friday Yuk (Sept 7)

      As a young minister, I was asked by a funeral director to hold a grave-side service for a homeless man, with no family or friends. The funeral was to be held at a cemetery way back in the country, and this man would be the first to be laid to rest there.

      As I was not familiar with the backwoods area, I became lost; and being a typical man did not stop for directions. I finally arrived an hour late. I saw the backhoe and the crew, who were eating lunch, but the earse was nowhere in sight.

      I apologized to the workers for my tardiness, stepped to the side of the open grave and saw that the vault lid was already in place. I assured the workers I would not hold them up for long, but this was the proper thing to do. The workers gathered around, still eating their lunch. I poured out my heart and soul. As I preached the workers began to say “Amen,” “Praise the Lord,” and “Glory”! I preached, and I preached, like I’d never preached before, from Genesis all the way to Revelations.

      I closed the lengthy service with a prayer and walked to my car. As I was opening the door and taking off my coat, I overheard one of the workers saying to another, “I ain’t never seen anything like that before and I’ve been putting in septic tanks for twenty years.!

    • #2887248

      You guys are lacking your sense of humour

      by slayer_ ·

      In reply to Friday Yuk (Sept 7)

      A policeman brought four boys before a judge.

      “They were causing an awful lot of commotion at the zoo, your Honor”, he said.

      “Boys”, said the judge sternly, “I never like to hear reports of juvenile delinquency.

      Now I want each of you to tell me your name and what you were doing wrong”.

      “My name is George”, said the first boy, “and I threw peanuts into the elephant pen”.

      “My name is Pete”, said the second boy, “and I threw peanuts into the elephant pen”.

      “My name is Mike”, said the third boy, “and I threw peanuts into the elephant pen”.

      “My name is Peanuts”, said the fourth boy.

      • #2887222

        Not in my case

        by hal 9000 ·

        In reply to You guys are lacking your sense of humour

        It’s just that I have not got anything recently to post here.

        I get a lot of Jokes but lately they are a series of Pictures or just plain Unsuitable. :p


    • #2888330

      the friday yuk is way too quiet!

      by shellbot2 ·

      In reply to Friday Yuk (Sept 7)

      Hopefully I can chime in now and then, but as I’ve just started a new job I trying to lay low for a bit 🙂

Viewing 2 reply threads