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  • #2211627

    Friday Yuk Videos and Jokes

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    by neilb@uk ·

    Great three-minute comic cameo by Rik Mayall as Lord Flashheart.

    Enjoy a piece of the most over-the-top acting by an over-the-top comic.

    “AHH Nursey, I like it firm and fruity!  Am I pleased to see you or did I just put a CANOE in my pocket!”

    ——————————-

    OK, so now find something to make ME laugh!

    😀

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    • #3027764

      hehehe

      by jessie ·

      In reply to Friday Yuk Videos and Jokes

      a guy had 3 daughters.

      one daughter, Rose, says “daddy how did you come up with my name?”
      he says “right after you were born, the petal from a lovely rose fell to your forehead.”
      the 2nd daughter, Petunia asks the same thing “daddy how did you come up with MY name?”
      he says “right after you were born, the 2 petals from a pretty petunia fell to your forehead.”
      the 3rd daughter Cinderblock says “APSKYFOIUBLEEERRRRRRRGGGGHH”

      • #3028484

        Psssssssssssssssstttttvvvhhhhhht

        by slayer_ ·

        In reply to hehehe

        Dang, now there is coffee on my monitor…

        Too funny!!!

    • #3027763

      I can’t take the pressure

      by maecuff ·

      In reply to Friday Yuk Videos and Jokes

      Make you laugh? What if I post something and it’s not funny and you don’t laugh? I don’t think I could handle that.

      And I can’t look for any video clips because of the stupid web filter. By the time I CAN look for something, you’ll be in bed and it will be too late.

      I guess I could try finding some written words that are funny instead of a video, but then we get back to my initial fear. What if YOU don’t find it funny?

      Thanks, Neil..I was all excited about it being Friday and you’ve driven it out of me. I am left a quivering and inadequate basketcase.

      Rik Mayhall? Is he the guy who played Drop Dead Fred? Of all the movies I’ve had to watch (repeatedly) with my spawn, that one is my favorite.

      • #3028491

        That’s the man

        by neilb@uk ·

        In reply to I can’t take the pressure

        (well, spelt properly).

        If you post something and I don’t laugh, do you honestly think that I’m mean enough to tell you so?

        Oh, I am so hurt!

        :p

        Here’s Rik as Alan B’stard, with Cherie Blair, wife to our PM of the time.

        • #3028487

          Well

          by maecuff ·

          In reply to That’s the man

          The fact that you are hurt DOES help a little.

          I am following some sage advice to get over the stress you caused me. The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things that you’ve started and left undone.

          So..I ate the rest of a cheesecake, a bag of doritos, a box of chocolate and took the rest of my prozac.

          All better now.

          OHH..and thanks for the spelling correction. What would I do without you??

        • #3028482

          Continue to spell words incorrrectly

          by neilb@uk ·

          In reply to Well

          Round here, though, who would notice?

          Santee, maybe…

        • #3028481

          What I lack in spelling skills

          by maecuff ·

          In reply to Continue to spell words incorrrectly

          I make up in charm.

        • #3028477

          Of course

          by neilb@uk ·

          In reply to What I lack in spelling skills

          Goes without saying. 🙂

    • #3028486

      For the programmers..

      by shellbot ·

      In reply to Friday Yuk Videos and Jokes

      (i LOVE this one!!)

      “Have you heard about the object-oriented way to become wealthy?”
      “No…”
      “Inheritance.”

      • #3028485

        hehee

        by shellbot ·

        In reply to For the programmers..

        Two bytes meet. The first byte asks, ?Are you ill??
        The second byte replies, ?No, just feeling a bit off.?

        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

        Eight bytes walk into a bar. The bartender asks, ?Can I get you anything??

        ?Yeah,? reply the bytes. ?Make us a double.?

        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

        How many programers dose it take to change a light bulb?
        None ? It?s a hardware problem .

        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

        A programmer walks to the butcher shop and buys a kilo of meat. An hour later he comes back upset that the butcher shortchanged him by 24 grams.

        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
        (i laughed so hard at this one i almost blew coffee out my nose..doeat that make me a geek???)

        ?Knock, knock.?
        ?Who?s there??
        very long pause?.
        ?Java.?

        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

        From the Random Shack Data Processing Dictionary:

        Endless Loop: n., see Loop, Endless.
        Loop, Endless: n., see Endless Loop.

        • #3028367

          COBOL joke

          by nicknielsen ·

          In reply to hehee

          How are your sister and COBOL alike?

          If either one misses a period, all hell breaks loose.

    • #2870260

      Joke I inherited from my grandma, slightly updated.

      by ansugisalas ·

      In reply to Friday Yuk Videos and Jokes

      Once there was this secretary, who looked long and hard at that “we’re all in” Microsoft Cloud commercial.
      Then she says “I don’t know about the venus of willendorf, but I think that one is incomplete.”

      The orignial went: once there was this secretary …who thought that incomplete meant “balls and all”.

      Do you know the ad I’m talking about? Does anybody else see it like that, or do I just have a dirty mind?

      http://www.visual-arts-cork.com/prehistoric/venus-of-willendorf.htm

      http://www.microsoft.com/cloud/images/were_all_in_home.png <-The picture I refer to is in the top left corner.

    • #2870252

      Alrighty then.

      by boxfiddler ·

      In reply to Friday Yuk Videos and Jokes

      Try this.

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