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Friday Yuk ...with Bill Gates' head.

By OldER Mycroft ·
If you think the guillotine was invented for lopping the tops off enemies during the French Revolution, you're wrong. Detailed designs for the 'Halifax Gibbet' go back to 1577, and Yorkshire criminals were beheaded by such a machine for the crimes of extortion, theft and swindle.

Long before the French Revolution, there was a Halifax tailor named Abraham Halstead, who was father to Jonas Halstead. Jonas emigrated from Yorkshire in 1635 to start a new life in the Dutch colony of New Amsterdam, which had been swindled from the inhabitants for a fistful of dollars. Jonas found fortune as a land speculator, and when the Brits took over the colony it was renamed New York in honour of England's finest.

Old Jonas's descendants included the Maxwells, a Seattle banking family, one of whom was the grandfather of William Henry Gates the Third, born on October 28th 1955. Young Master Gates grew up to become the richest man in the world, and was responsible for inflicting Microsoft on the native inhabitants of the entire planet for a few dollars more.

Halifax parish church, where Bill Gates' ancestor was baptised, recently sent a polite request to the billionaire asking him to get in touch on a financial matter, but at time of writing it has been ignored.

Mind your head, Bill.


Excerpt from Zygote, Computer Shopper, Dec 08 edition

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What is it

by boxfiddler Moderator In reply to Friday Yuk ...with Bill ...

with you and heads lately?

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Mmm - use it or lose it?

by OldER Mycroft In reply to What is it

That sort of thing, I think.

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Dontcha know.

by boxfiddler Moderator In reply to Mmm - use it or lose it?

If it's not opened, after awhile the file cabinet gets pretty damn dusty.
bleeme, I should know!

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Watch it; he's trying to get a little. :^0 <NT>

by sleepin'dawg In reply to What is it
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]:) er... never mind. <nt>

by boxfiddler Moderator In reply to Watch it; he's trying to ...
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Hearts & Minds ...

by OldER Mycroft In reply to Friday Yuk ...with Bill ...

Do you remember all that propaganda about the battle for the hearts and minds of the peoples of Iraq and Afghanistan? It seems the minds have taken priority over the hearts because the US Defense Intelligence Agency has announced it is investing huge sums in neurotechnology. That's the science of getting into your enemy's head without blowing it open first. The business of transmitting thought waves as images is particularly attractive to those whose job it is to interrogate captured combatants and terrorist suspects. But why stop there?

Viewing the thoughts of voters as they select which button to press is only one step away from understanding how those thoughts are formed, and two steps away from manipulating the thoughts.

As well as mind-reading, the forces of Freem-n-Dmoxy are also delving into behavioural control via direct brain interfaces. Zygote doesn't really see why this is newsworthy, as it is obvious that such a programme has been under way for a generation, using nothing more technical than the ingestion of cattle pap in sesame-seed buns.

Excerpt from Zygote, Computer Shopper, Dec 08 edition

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Concerned about the election?

by jdclyde In reply to Friday Yuk ...with Bill ...

http://slatev.com/player.html?id=1842856410

This will set your mind at ease.

(clean and work friendly)

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We've got enough pinkos. Keep your bleeding heart liberals. <NT>

by sleepin'dawg In reply to Concerned about the elect ...
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Holy cow.

by boxfiddler Moderator In reply to Concerned about the elect ...

RCMP resembles Enzyte Bob!

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