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  • #2196225

    My last year… a LOOOONG story


    by locrian_lyric ·

    Well, about a year ago, I dropped off the grid.

    Here’s what happened.

    I started losing focus and had a series of migraines, something I had never experienced before.

    As it turns out, those were not just migraines, but mini-strokes.

    I lost the ability to speak for a few days, and when it came back, I stammered badly and had a serious stutter on top of it. Words did not come to me easily and I went from having an eidetic memory to being barely able to remember basic everyday functions. I was having frequent seizure like episodes which increased until I was having several times a day.

    My wife called in her father and sister and moved us to Colorado where she could have assistance caring for me and our infant daughter. Under doctors orders, I could not be left alone.

    Shortly afterward, my wife had a miscarriage. Most likely this was due to the stress.

    My health in general crashed. My diabetes raged out of control as did my blood pressure. I also fell into a deep depression.

    The end result is that I am now under doctor’s orders to abandon IT work. My mind no longer works fast enough to handle the work, and my emotional state is far too unstable to handle the stress.

    Now, I am looking for something new to do for a living.

    I’ll answer any questions anybody may have.

All Comments

  • Author
    • #2839328

      Mine is an observation

      by santeewelding ·

      In reply to My last year… a LOOOONG story

      The observation is that your intellect came through just fine.

    • #2839324

      Sorry to hear it.

      by boxfiddler ·

      In reply to My last year… a LOOOONG story

      Nice to see you back here. 🙂


    • #2839322

      Very sorry to hear that

      by nicknielsen ·

      In reply to My last year… a LOOOONG story

      I don’t know you well enough to make suggestions outright, but perhaps one or more of these questions will provide some ideas:

      What other interests or talents do you have? Is it possible you could make a living at one of those?

      Does the work location matter, or should you work from home?

      Have you looked into vocational rehab? If you can no longer do your job for medical reasons, you may be eligible for training or other support.

      • #2839289

        I’ve signed up for vocational rehab.

        by locrian_lyric ·

        In reply to Very sorry to hear that

        They are helping me look into jobs I can do with my other talent.s

      • #2839263

        Good job Nick

        by shasca ·

        In reply to Very sorry to hear that

        I was reading through the responses, and was going to post the same things about interests, talents, hobbies etc.

        L.L. you seem very articulate, and very sharp in your expresions. I would think that you would be able to share your talents in some manner with those that would have a need. I would not be surprise if that once you made the inquiries, and provided your employement history, and acquired skill set, that a line formed for said skills.

        You have made me appreciate just how good my life and good health is. I will not ever take those for granted.

        See you are already providing a service.

        Please take care of yourself, and your family.

        • #2839251


          by boxfiddler ·

          In reply to Good job Nick

          I recognize that avatar! 😀

        • #2839250

          Hats off!

          by santeewelding ·

          In reply to Good job Nick

          Keep it by you.

        • #2838944

          “You have made me appreciate just how good my life and good health is.”

          by dmambo ·

          In reply to Good job Nick

          It’s easy to take for granted what we have. Locrian’s story really brings home home fragile our situations can be.

          Best of luck, LL. Consider bloging about it. It could be the start of getting the writing career off the ground as others have suggested.

    • #2839321


      by maecuff ·

      In reply to My last year… a LOOOONG story

      You have a long road ahead of you. You have a baby girl, a family who obviously cares for you. You have a lot in your favor. Try not to lose sight of that while you’re finding your way.

      I wish you all the best.

      • #2839282

        I”ll be okay.

        by locrian_lyric ·

        In reply to Wow

        I was suicidal for a while, and nearly hospitalized for it. But I’m past that and resigned to the fact that I’ll be doing something else.

        Who knows? This could be interesting.

        • #2839271

          It probably will be interesting.

          by ron k. ·

          In reply to I”ll be okay.

          I changed careers several times just to do something new. I worked with a lot of people that wanted to be in the same job for 30 years or more. No thank you.
          Hang in there.

    • #2839258

      Wow, glad to see you

      by jamesrl ·

      In reply to My last year… a LOOOONG story

      You know we haven’t always agreed, but I try as best I can to disagree with an argument, not the person, so far as it can be helped.

      You’ve had a rough patch. Worse than I’ve ever experienced, so I can’t give you the voice of experience. But what I can say is that your family is more important than your career or job. You have to give yourself permission to be helped. I know its hard, especially for men. But you need time to heal, time to assess, time to think and plan.

      Let us know how we can help.


    • #2839253

      Hope things turn around for you

      by jdclyde ·

      In reply to My last year… a LOOOONG story

      We all have issues, and all we can do is the best we can.

      Good luck getting through this.


    • #2839179

      Investigate writing

      by delbertpgh ·

      In reply to My last year… a LOOOONG story

      I notice you write to the point. Given a clear message, you put it across clearly. This is not an everyday gift.

      You could write about IT subjects. You have some history and expertise there. You probably also have stories to tell, from your own life. Writing them out may help you develop the gift of seeing other stories that are lying around, waiting for an author’s voice.

      You may be able to do consulting, even as little as delivering, say, Excel-based VB applications to small businesses. It demands dealing with people, assessing requirements, understanding the picture, and fitting a tool to the task. Quickness of apprehension is not the same as excellence of understanding, and you may well find that your apparent mental issues are not obstacles to the important uses of your brain. Most of the programming could be done at a home office, a help to you. It would give you something else to write about, incidentally.

      Also, don’t neglect the medical and physical aspects of your case. Assuming everything is linked to the diabetes, which is reasonable, you should fight it. Get rid of any grey fat piled up on your internal organs (which is suspected to be an evil agent in type 2 diabetes.) Lose weight, avoid all sugar and most simple starches, and become physically fit. These steps will help address depression as well. Become an expert in your diseases, so you can judge what your physician is telling you. Physicians are not gods; they have lots of personal shortcomings that may influence the way they work and the advice they give you. Good doctors and bad doctors are like good an bad auto mechanics; the only way you can tell if you’re getting good mechanical advice is to understand your car. So, understand yourself, and get a fresh doc, or ignore some of what he says, when he’s talking crap.

      Good luck to you. Men in my family have been cut back by diabetes; it’s a pig of a disease. Take as much control as you can.

      • #2839152

        That’s my thought too

        by gsg ·

        In reply to Investigate writing

        I was going to suggest that. LL seems very articulate, with excellent writing skills.

        Since there’s a background in IT, maybe Technical Writing!

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