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Ok, parent question for the mom's and dad's out there

By DanLM ·
I just received a phone call from my 14 year old daughter(yes, she needs money). She wanted to know if she could have money to buy a semi formal dress.

Let's see, how should I phrase how I answered this. She asked for 100 dollars, I asked if she had even looked yet for the dress. I talked to her mom and told her to go find one, and then tell me how much. Basically, I just said don't kill me. In other words, make my baby look good. Actually, tomorrow I'm going to call the X and tell her I'll pay for the dress(make her look good), the shoes, and get her hair done. I'll transfer the money to her account when I find out how much.

I live about 360 miles from my daughter. I moved here to be with Laura(my better half), and to get out of a job I hated. I took my retirement. With my current contract that I am working under, I am financially better off then I ever have been. ****, I even have a savings. The company that I am working for is most likely going to offer me a job if they can. Which I want, because I need the health benefits(sucks to get old).

Now to the question:
1). The formal is the 20th of the month, is it to late to ask for this time off. Fk it, I don't care about the money(I won't get paid for the time off). But, I don't want to screw up a future job opportunity.
2). Will I make my daughter uncomfortable. Ie, the proud dad with camera and tears in his eyes.

Yea, ok. You all found my soft spot. But, I would like some insight here.


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Don't miss it on your life.

by mjd420nova In reply to Ok, parent question for t ...

You'd never forgive yourself. Get a good camera or rent a camcorder but capture the moment. Explain to your employer and have a schedule you can cut to the bone to make it fit in the time they will give you. Don't be afraid to hide your emotions, let it out if that's the effect it has. At least you'll have something to show, memories are cool but a proud dad needs to have some reminders.

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What's the problem?

by maxwell edison In reply to Ok, parent question for t ...

You just go. Family comes first -- especially kids. The time I spend with my teenage son either just "hanging out" or doing things/going places is my full time job. My work comes second. I do, however, manage to give those two things about equal time.

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Yeah, like he said

by DelbertPGH In reply to What's the problem?

If you honestly want to go see your kid go to some damn dumb formal, then be honest. Take the day off, travel 360 miles, stand around like a goof with a camera, be honestly, candidly happy about it. You will no doubt embarass her and impress her.

Did I say you should be honest, with your intent written all over your face? Because if you can't be honest about and with your kid, you're just wasting your years.

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This is a 'once in a lifetime event' you should be there.

by Deadly Ernest In reply to Ok, parent question for t ...

And knowing that you went to the trouble to be there will have a beneficial impact on your daughter, she may complain about being embarrassed, but she'll be glad you made the effort. It'll confirm how you feel, especially after you've organised for the dress, etc.

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As Im not long out of being the embarressed daughter

by Steffi28 In reply to Ok, parent question for t ...

Im 21 so its not so long ago when I was the embaressed teenage daughter so hopefully I can help with answer 2. The fact is most daughters would love nothing more than to be embarressed by the proud father.

We pretend that we dont want them there but no matter how much i protested my parents always went, and I think if they would of said "ok then we wont go" I would of been really upset and been like, "oh well then I suppose its not that bad if you go" theres such a stigma attached with going anywhere with parents that we try to be "cool" by not wanting our parents there. Basically I think you should go if not for yourself, but for your daughter.

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do whatever ya have to

by Shellbot In reply to Ok, parent question for t ...

but GO

She WILL want you there..especially because you are going to pay the bill..she will want you to see how beautiful she loks, even if she doesn't say it.

Good for you, to want to pay for the dress, the hair, the shoes..a lot of fathers wouldn't understand what its like to be that age and would moan at having to pay 50 bucks for a dress..

Spned whatever you have to because you'll both remember it forever.

My ex would spend 80 having dinner and drinks, yet refuse to get a decent pair of jeans because they cost 40..

Its all about priorities :)

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I think question 1 is mute now, I just checked the calendar

by DanLM In reply to Ok, parent question for t ...

The date of this pre thing is the 20th, it's a saturday. I'll leave that morning to be there, it only takes 6 hours. I should be there in plenty of time.

The second question, thank you for your input. I really want to go and I will.


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Have fun :)

by Shellbot In reply to I think question 1 is mut ...

take loads of photos, and if you get a really nice one, get a 5x7 or larger and a nice frame and give it to her as a pressie.

I hope she has a great time!

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"moot", not "mute"

by john.a.wills In reply to I think question 1 is mut ...

although I suppose one might argue for "mute"

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hu? ahhh, never mind

by DanLM In reply to "moot", not "mute"

I can't spell, sorry.


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