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Project of Doom

By GSG ·
Tags: Off Topic
I swear that this project is doomed. A simple copy of a database has turned into a complete fiasco, that if you aren't the PM (aka, Me), is quite funny.

We have a 26 GB database that was to be copied to an external drive by a local onsite vendor tech, shipped to their corporate, and sent through their test conversion process so that when we upgraded, we knew of any potential issues in advance. Then the drive, with the cleaned data was supposed to be sent back to us for installation on the new test database.

First, the vendor forgot to tell the local tech to take the copy.. twice. Finally, he gets the copy and ships it off. We were supposed to have the external drive last week, so they could copy the DB to the test server starting on Monday.

The vendor didn't ship the drive, because they "forgot" to assign someone to do the DB installation and copy of the tables back to the test server. They assign a new resource who sounds like he smokes about 10 joints per day, and takes a few bennies as well. He decides that he's not going to use the copy on the drive, but he's going to SFTP the 26GB DB to himself, convert the DB again, and then SFTP the whole thing back. I say to my co-worker, "Seriously? I swear this guy is high."

Surprise! That doesn't work, so he overnights the external drive. He wants me to hook up the drive and he's going to transfer the data. Uh, no. I'm not hooking this up directly to the server because it's USB, and I've told you it's a virtual server. I'll create a share and copy the data up to the share because I don't trust you at this point.

It's an encrypted drive (hallelujah, they did something right), but guess who forgot the password and didn't write it down? Yep, the tech who sounds like Bill and/or Ted (Bill and Ted's excellent adventure). Oh sweet baby Jesus... It takes him an hour before he finally gives me the right password.

So, I start the copy. Really, Microsoft? If you can't calculate the minutes remaining correctly, just give it up. Three hours ago, it said I had 160 minutes remaining. I have 8GB remaining, and you say I have 196 minutes remaining. I must have a warp in the space-time contiuum in my office. Oh, wait, it's now 220 minutes. Maybe it's a singularity.

In the middle of all of this, the wireless node that I was connected to decided to go down. So, I had to identify the file it died on, and start the copy again from that point.

I'm waiting for the drive to burst into flame, and let loose a plague of locusts next. If this project meets its milestones, I'll be surprised. Either way, I'll be having a "discussion" with the PM on the vendor side about her ability to assign resources.

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Dang, GSG.

by boxfiddler Moderator In reply to Project of Doom


I see that I needs appreciate my current situation.

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finally finished

by GSG In reply to Dang, GSG.

The upload that was supposed to take 160 minutes took 5 hours and finally finished a little while ago.

It's a miracle, but the project is actually still on schedule. It's just that I'm very detail oriented and very schedule-driven and everyone I'm working with at this company is just the opposite. They treat a schedule as a general guideline, and it's driving me batty.

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AH I see the problem here

by HAL 9000 Moderator In reply to finally finished

Firstly you use a M$ Product and expect it to tell you the truth. That's your first mistake all M$ products LIE to you on a regular Basis.

The next thing is that they are seeing your Timetable as a Time to start the process not finish it so that is what is driving you nuts. You need to sit back and Mellow Out so lock your Office Door roll a Splif about so long and just Mellow Out for the next 3 days that it takes to smoke it. :0

Surely you know that it will all be the same tomorrow don't you? :^0

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Yep, M$

by GSG In reply to AH I see the problem here

Unfortunately, I don't have much choice about using Microsoft. There are only 2 companies that have this offering, and they both require Microsoft as an OS, so I'm stuck.

The good news is that we are meeting our milestones, but I can't be flexible on them as I'm involved in other projects and I'm juggling like crazy to meet these milestones.

Honestly, though, at the end of the day, looking back at it, this was all minor set backs and taken together was quite funny. I'll laugh when we're done.

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by NickNielsen In reply to finally finished

If you haven't guessed already, I was the poor pilot fish...

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