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  • #2152855

    Should Windows have

    Locked

    by the scummy one ·

    a desktop icon called “I Am Too Stupid to Understand This!”

    I swear, some of the questions here AND some of the trouble calls I get AND some of the off-work calls that I get make me think YES.

    MS programmers need to add the all encompassing “I am too stupid” icon on the desktop, that can bring up the help files and make recommendations about objects clicked on.
    Like, for example, Click the too stupid icon and then click on “My Documents, and it tells what the my documents does, and how to use it step by step.
    Or
    click on too stupid icon and then click on the HELP button in an MS app and it explains What the HELP means and how to use it
    OR
    click the too stupid icon when installing something and it asks a question (like click OK or CANCEL), and it will say something like If you want to install it, choose OK, if not choose CANCEL you friggin IDIOT!
    Or — ok, I’ll just leave it at those for now. All three were good examples

All Comments

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    • #2916623

      :D :D :D

      by boxfiddler ·

      In reply to Should Windows have

      [i]click on too stupid icon and then click on the HELP button in an MS app and it explains What the HELP means and how to use it[/i]


      That would be my pick.

    • #2916620
      Avatar photo

      Most Defiantly

      by hal 9000 ·

      In reply to Should Windows have

      But of course the Help Desk or the Scummy One would still get calls asking how to turn it on to get to the [b]I’m too stupid button.[/b] :p

      It needs a lot more that what was listed here as they don’t go anywhere near far enough. I would suggest a I’m Too Stupid Hand held device explaining how to plug in turn on and get to the I’m Too Stupid Icon. Those could also cover power outages or unplugged systems. You know very complex things like Plug it in and turn on the switch and when the lights don’t work and no other electrical device works the computer is very unlikely to either type directions.

      Or the really important ones NB Batteries go flat when you don’t plug in the Mains Adapter and then the NB Stops working.

      But no matter how simple you make things the End User will still find ways to muck up the system or just fail to understand how it works. :_|

      I had one person who scanned in Medical Reports for a Doctor and after 5 years she suddenly decided that the unit was no longer working because after scanning in the reports they didn’t appear in the Patient Records. Apparently she failed to understand that the Quack had to read the reports and forward them onto the revel ant Persons Records for some reason unknown to anyone but her she thought that once she scanned them in they just magically went straight to the Patient Records without any other intervention. 🙁

      Col

      • #2916608

        Most Defiantly???

        by the scummy one ·

        In reply to Most Defiantly

        So it should have it but after much restraint and against better judgement???

        I Can Spell

    • #2916619

      yup

      by jaqui ·

      In reply to Should Windows have

      and click the icon then the start menu and it goes and installs ubuntu, the distro that crashes at 1400 fonts. 😀

      • #2916617

        Really?

        by boxfiddler ·

        In reply to yup

        ‘buntu crashes at 1400 fonts? Just having 1400 installed, or trying to use all 1400 at the same time?

        Please detail your testing! 😀

        I have PowerPoint students who muck up their Final Presentation something fierce by using way too many different fonts in a presentation. You tickled my funny bone. Thanks.

        • #2916600

          Power corrupts;

          by charliespencer ·

          In reply to Really?

          absolute PowerPoint corrupts absolutely.

          The most dangerous thing in the Army is a 2nd Lieutenant with a map and a compass. The second most dangerous thing is a staff officer with PowerPoint and a projector.

          PowerPoint is the most misused application in the history of desktop computing.

        • #2916598

          not my testing

          by jaqui ·

          In reply to Really?

          my neighbor installed 1400 fonts and had to reboot, and that stpped him from being able to login.. to many ofnts. had to uninstall them to be able to get back up and running.

          14633 fonts available to him, and Ubuntu won’t let him install them. ]:)
          Mandriva will let me install them all. ]:)
          [ yes, he only installed 10% and crashed ubuntu ]

        • #2916592

          Am I reading you right?

          by ontheropes ·

          In reply to not my testing

          Do you have 14633 fonts on one of your computers?

        • #2916537

          nope

          by jaqui ·

          In reply to Am I reading you right?

          I have a folder on one of my systems with 14633 fonts in it.

          on that same computer I have 16,187 fonts installed. 😀

        • #2916490

          I’ve thought about collecting fonts for my Windows box..

          by ontheropes ·

          In reply to nope

          Haven’t yet. Makes me wonder how many fonts it’d take to break Windows.

        • #2918478
          Avatar photo

          Not a lot actually

          by hal 9000 ·

          In reply to I’ve thought about collecting fonts for my Windows box..

          While I’ve never bothered to install any more than the Default ones that come with Corel Draw I did have one customer who wanted to install them all well all of the ones available with Corel Draw 12 I think. When the Windows Installer refused to allow her to install them all she set about installing the remaining several classes individually. Wasn’t long before the system hung.

          Apparently she thought that as she had paid for these fonts with the purchase of Draw she had to install them to get her money’s worth. 😀

          She complained bitterly that she had wasted money and asked why I had supplied Draw to them & I could only say that it’s what you told me you need to use and no matter how much I tried to talk you out of it you insisted that you had to have it. Well apparently they did need it but she didn’t need it installed on her machine one of the office staff used it so she had to have a copy installed. Funny thing is that about 6 months latter I had to remove most of the Default Corel Fonts because she was complaining that there where too many type faces to chose from and she was unable to get any letters written. The rest of the time that she was there she used 2 Fonts and never opened Draw. :^0

          Col

      • #2916616
        Avatar photo

        But the Font I want

        by hal 9000 ·

        In reply to yup

        Isn’t there so I should be able to install them all so I can find the one that I want. 😀

        Of course if it shut down the computer and powered off whenever there was any form of flowing substance around the computer it would be even better. :^0

        Col ]:)

    • #2916601

      You only need to install it in a couple of places.

      by charliespencer ·

      In reply to Should Windows have

      You only need it on the HR manager and / or the Training manager’s computers. That’s the “I’m too stupid to hire trained people / train the people I’ve hired.” button.

    • #2916596

      Yep. An icon 4x the size of the rest of the icons.

      by ontheropes ·

      In reply to Should Windows have

      I’m fixing two computers for a friend of mine – for the third time – and they’ll be just fine until his teenage daughters get on them again.

      I don’t really care. Not my problem. Computers are just a hobby for me.

    • #2916591

      Yes, and it should look like this

      by nicknielsen ·

      In reply to Should Windows have

      Actual size

    • #2916524

      Its a PICNIC case

      by oz_media ·

      In reply to Should Windows have

      Problem In Chair Not In Computer

    • #2916520

      Yep it should :)

      by rob miners ·

      In reply to Should Windows have

      It is normally the nut on the keyboard that comes loose and trying to get it back on doesn’t always work. 😉

    • #2916510

      what happens if

      by ceespace ·

      In reply to Should Windows have

      you click on the I’m too stupid icon and then click on it again?

      (must be off my computer wants to restart)

      • #2916426

        Good Question — Hmmm

        by w2ktechman ·

        In reply to what happens if

        at first thought I would say

        PC Error

        Or maybe it should ask “Are you really that Stupid. If you click YES, you will be removed from the computer.

        If they continue from yes, the computer should blow up with enough force to take them out!

        • #2918475
          Avatar photo

          NO you need to follow the KISS Principal here

          by hal 9000 ·

          In reply to Good Question — Hmmm

          Yes that right Keep It Simple Stupid when they click on Yes they are prompted to Insert one of those Special Blank CD’s and ten the computer burns it for them. You know one of those batch that uploaded while burning that where around many years ago when the high speed burners first came out. 😀

          I’ve seen one go off in a brand new computer and they never did dig the bits of plastic out of the wall. :p

          That way when you replace the CD Burner it’s ready to take out the next one who sits in that chair. Cheap and so easy. 😉

          Col

        • #2918447

          Nice :D

          by the scummy one ·

          In reply to NO you need to follow the KISS Principal here

          And it looks like an Accident :^0

        • #2929201
          Avatar photo

          Exactly :D

          by hal 9000 ·

          In reply to Nice :D

          Works every time. :0

          Of course the Victim wanted the Case there so it was easy to put the Blank Disc into the machine. 😉

        • #2929193

          And such a HAL thing to do

          by w2ktechman ·

          In reply to Exactly :D

          leaves plenty of room for deniability :0

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