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Sunday Yuk

By neilb@uk ·
I was looking through this web site for some examples of a reference lette (for a friend for a college course) and came across these so I thought I'd share them They are (allegedly real) quotes from letters to the council's housing department for Islington - a London borough.

"I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off."

"I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage."

"Their 18 year old son is continuously banging his balls against my fence."

"I wish to report that tiles are missing from the roof of the outside toilet and I think it was bad wind the other night that blew them off."

"The lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?"

"I am writing on behalf of my sink which is coming away from the wall."

"Will you please send someone to mend the garden path. My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant."

"I request your permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen."

"Can you please tell me when the repairs will be done as my wife is about to become an expectant mother."

"I am still having trouble with smoke in my built in drawers."

"The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared."

"Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny colour and not fit to drink."

"Our lavatory seat is broken in half and now it is in three pieces."

"Would you please send a man to repair my sprout. I am an old age pensioner and need it straight away."

"I want to complain about the farmer across the road; every morning at 6am his **** wakes me up and it's getting too much."

"The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous."

"Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third so will you please send someone around to do something about it."

"I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would be pleased if you could do something about the noise made by the man I have on top of me every night."

"Please send a man with clean tools to finish the job and satisfy the wife."

"I have had the Clerk of the Works down on the floor six times, but still have no satisfaction."

"We are getting married in September and would like it in the garden before we move into the house."

"This is to let you know that our lavatory seat is broken and we can't get BBC2."

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Iknow! I know!

by neilb@uk In reply to Sunday Yuk

It defaults to Network Admin. I meant to put this in Miscellaneous.

I care?

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You SHOULD care

by maecuff In reply to Iknow! I know!

you inconsiderate b@stard. People will be confused. Chaos will ensue. How many people will have what would have been a perfectly enjoyable Sunday ruined because of your carelessness??

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Lots, hopefully

by neilb@uk In reply to You SHOULD care

I'm sitting here remotely fixing our Exchange system (turns to spit) and I'm having a BAD day so if I can, in some small way, contribute to the dicomfiture in others then, I believe, I will have balanced the books just a little.

It's windy, raining and cold, here. At least I could not have planned the weather better. ]:)

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you're just a ray of sunshine..

by maecuff In reply to Lots, hopefully :p

It's windy, raining and cold here also.

On top of bad weather, it appears that I've lost my mind, or at least, it's beginning to unravel. I went to run an errand, was in the store for 20 minutes or so, went to leave and couldn't find my car keys. I retraced my steps, went to the counter to see if someone turned them in. Nothing. So, I thought, maybe I left them in the car, that isn't something I normally do, but who knows.

Not only did I leave my keys in the car, I didn't turn it off. It sat there running the whole time. I'm pretty sure I've destroyed one too many of my brain cells.

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you lucked out

by jdclyde In reply to you're just a ray of suns ...

besides the $20 in gas you burned up, your lucky the car was even there.

Maybe you were distracted by the thought of taking your shovel to some of the stupid drivers you passed on the way to the store? ;\

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Not a clue

by maecuff In reply to you lucked out

I have no memory of leaving the car running. None at all. And yes, I'm glad it didn't get stolen, I've only had it a few weeks.

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If Mae's car is like my car ...

by Too Old For IT In reply to you lucked out

... no one would want that Adam Sandler Special.

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weather

by Shellbot In reply to you're just a ray of suns ...

its still rotten here..wind & rain..
i actually tried to "think" myself sick (mind over matter) so i could just stay in bed today rather than get up and go out in this shite!

on the upside..booked hols..leave June 19 for 2 weeks in Spain.

life has its moments..

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it was wet here today

by Jaqui In reply to Lots, hopefully :p

and I loved it.

now, I'm hoping we get more of the same, really **** buckets out all day monday.

just so Victoria Day will get the parades rained on.

yup,
the Victoria Day holiday, for the Queen's B-day.

got some woman being bruha-haed on the news..seems her legal name is Victoria Canada, so she is celebrating it in Victoria, Canada, the capitol of BC.

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Bright Yellow Thing in the Sky

by Too Old For IT In reply to it was wet here today

Dunno what it is, wrong shape for a Vorlon Battle Cruiser ...

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