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Tuesday Funnies - July 3, 2012

By PurpleSkys ·
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If Microsoft had been the first to invent books


If Microsoft had been the first to invent books:

1. Before you can open the cover of your new book, you must obtain a book activation code by phoning Microsoft.

2. Sorry, only one person may ever read your book.

3. It's full of spelling mistakes and typos.

4. When you're reading your book, the type can mysteriously disappear.

5. Libraries, which are for sharing books, are illegal.

6. You must acknowledge you have read and understood the Book License Agreement Hype (BLAH) before you can read your book.

7. Microsoft has the right to enter your premises to conduct book inspections to make sure your book is being read in accordance with the BLAH.

8. The Book Users' Group General Alliance (BUGGA) calculates that the annual loss of revenues to Microsoft arising from BLAH violations in 2001 was $10.97 billion.

9. There are two versions of your book - the "Standard" and the "Pro" versions. In the standard version, those pages containing the most useful information have been stuck together.

10. At random times the letters your book may suddenly scramble for no apparent reason. Simply give the book a good kicking - this is called rebooting.

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Just for you then PS

by HAL 9000 Moderator In reply to Tuesday Funnies - July 3, ...

A woman from New York was
driving through a remote part of Arizona when her car
broke down.
An American Indian on
horseback came along and offered her a ride to a nearby
town.

She climbed up behind him on the horse and they
rode off. The ride was uneventful, except that every
few minutes the Indian would
let out a Ye-e-e-e-h-a-a-a-a' so loud that it echoed from the
surrounding hills and canyon walls.
When they arrived in town, he
let her off at the local service station, yelled one final
'Ye-e-e-e-h-a-a-a-a!' and rode off.

"What did you
do to get that Indian so excited?" asked the service-station
attendant.

"Nothing," the woman answered "I
merely sat behind him on the horse, put my
arms
around his waist, and held onto the saddle horn so I wouldn't
fall off."

"Lady," the attendant said, "Indians don't
use saddles."

Enjoy.

Col

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i know it's not Tuesday

by PurpleSkys In reply to Tuesday Funnies - July 3, ...

but i really have to share this link...this lady has it nailed http://novascotia. kijiji. ca/c-buy-and-sell-phones-PDAs-ipods-BLACKBERRY-WANTED-FOR-13-YEAR-OLD-GOING-ON-20-W0QQAdIdZ393835741

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