Hardware

Ask something
Discussion Locked

Friday Yuk

0 helpful
148 replies

by dspeacock 2 views

Closed to new repliesThis discussion is closed. It stays readable, but it takes no new replies.

This is page 2 of the discussion. Read the opening post

148 replies

by hal 9000

Apparently they tried showing a first draft to 385 Blonde's and none could understand what was being told to them so those given the task of Translating took the easy way out and shoot themselves as it was far less painful to them than attempting to try again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again.

So The Translation Project has been canned and the Blonds allowed 3 weeks [b]WOO[/b] as it saves the real work staff who are not as expendable as the blonde's. :0

Col ]:)

by dspeacock

And here I was, thinking all this time that it was Australia and New Zealand where men were men and sheep were nervous. Now I find that it's really California!!!! Trust the Granola State :-)

by ontheropes

...when I posted something about sheep in the Yuk? :D

Hint: Any or all of a TR profile could be pure BS or more appropriate here, pure SS.

Once I thought the profile served a useful purpose, then I didn't.

Then I thought it should be optional for people to display a profile or not or that it should be optional only for your contacts to view it.

It's been seen that I can change my mind and of course TR doesn't have to give a rip what I think.

Now I look at the profile as just another outlet for a boredashellgoingtodosomethingstoopid malady I suffer with and afflict on others.

Edited:

by hal 9000

In the UK where she is looking for NeilB to finish off what GG failed to do a little while ago. :0

Apparently something posted above hurt Mae's feelings and when the chance of a Business Trip to London came up she just couldn't refuse to take it and at the same time pay NeilB a visit with her Shiny Shovel. :D

She has a need to dirty it all up and as the Police are closing in on her in her native country she feels that some overseas trips where she can continue her actions will come as a complete surprise to those Countries Police Forces and that she is very unlikely to be caught. Unless of course her Hubby takes more pictures of her in action again. :0

Col ]:)

by maecuff

I've got a bad case of the auditors.

Besides, that's way too easy. JD deserves better than that. And I'm afraid that if I'm not nicer to him that he'll cry.

by steffi28

I want one ;)

Edited because the letters keep swapping themselves about when I press submit!!

by nicknielsen

Maybe definition by example...

Q: Why did the blonde stare at the frozen orange juice container for two hours?
A: Because it said concentrate.

Q: Why did the blonde use an entire bottle of shampoo to wash her hair?
A: Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

Q: How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday?
A: Tell her a joke on Wednesday.

Q: What is the blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears?
A: Trying to hold on to a thought.

Q: Why don't blondes have elevator jobs?
A: They don't know the route.

Q: Why do blondes work seven days a week?
A: So you don't have to retrain them on Monday.

Q: How does a blonde commit suicide?
A: She gathers her clothes into a pile and jumps off.

Did it help?

by tig2

It's an American thing, not a blonde thing.

Promise.

Go red. You'll not regret it. And from me? Redheads have more fun than blondes!

by tig2

That you have seen granola!

And yes, I can say that. I'm a native Californian. But I left.
:)

by w2ktechman

as I have no idea where the granola would even be!
I know where the wine is (but I dont like wine), I know where the desert is, I know where Yosemite is, but after that it is all foggy! ?:|

by hal 9000

Sounds like I need to get Ziggy Freud to attend you for the next 300 years till you are finally cured and can admit to where you saw the Granola and the devious disgusting things that you did to those poor defenceless sheep. You will eventually find out that you avoided the ones with the red marks on their rear legs as this is a sign that they are either Rams or that they kick. :D

Col ]:)

by w2ktechman

only exists at TR when posting. Often I will think that I am replying to a post and in fact, it was placed in an entirely different place than I had thought. Probably because I am not paying enough attention at the time...

As far as you and I go, there is not a 'wrong spot'!!!

by w2ktechman

Wow, I must be a sick, sick person. I will take your word for my past until I can prove otherwise

by half9

come over here, we have 40 million of them. Be afraid, be very afraid. Violence of the lambs

by w2ktechman

the documenary??? Shouldnt you be hiding or something???
Or did Hal fix you up with the upgraded auto?

by half9

Yes it was a laugh for sure, mind, u look at the paddocks diffrently now.

by deadly ernest

in the paddocks next to me at the moment. The farmer who I rent off still wonders why I don't buy any mutton or lamb at the local butchers, I have a free supply - a quick slice with a sharp knife, some more butchering and cheap meat. But I'm willing to rent a few out to you guys if you want, cheap rates for ewe.

by steffi28

I'm hurt, really really hurt. here was me thinking you were someone kind of l33t hax0r d00d someone I could look up to, you've let me down.

I thought I was the only woman for you, but you've been cheating on me....with sheep!!!

Explain yourself!! :( :_|

Edited to add, to all my men out there It's ok for me to have more than one i'm special ;)

by steffi28

The following extracts are typed into the Unix "Cshell"
with hilarious results:-

% ^How did the sex change^operation go?
Modifier failed.

% make love
Make: Don't know how to make love. Stop.

% man woman
No manual entry for woman.

% sleep with me
bad character

% got a light?
No match.

% man: why did you get a divorce?
man:: Too many arguments.

% scan for <<"Arnold Schwarzenegger"^J^D
"Arnold Schwarzenegger": << terminator not found

% ar m God
ar: God does not exist

% ^What is saccharine?
Bad substitute.

% %blow
%blow: No such job.

% cat 'the can of tuna'
cat: cannot open the can of tuna

$ mkdir matter; cat>matter
matter: cannot create

$ drink

by daveo2000

I see you are up to "3" now!

Where did you get the Unix jokes? They are pretty funny. :D

by steffi28

I didnt even notice I got a 3rd, I wonder what that was from! I'll have to have a look now!!

As for the jokes, I am addicted to stumble upon, so there you go, cant remember the site though.

by maecuff

they don't allow leaf blowers or shovels on airplanes anymore.

Besides, I wouldn't be mean to Neil. Unless he asks nicely.

by hal 9000

You have already sent the shovel over by Air Freight so that you have your favourite weapon of choice available the moment that you set foot on UK Soil. You see I know everything and I can even post the shipping packet number here if you wish and the delivery service that you used. :^0

Col ]:)

by hal 9000

Provided that you don't break any skin between now and your operation! :p

I was speaking to your surgeon today and he's looking forward to performing this procedure but then again he really hates that Breast Specialist in Liverpool. :0

Apparently when both where in Scotland doing something they had a bit of a falling out and they have never spoken to each other since, this is his way of getting his own back on the guy in Liverpool and at no cost to himself so he's over the moon with the procedure that will be a [b]First in the World[/b] so that makes him doubly interested in performing this series of operations. He is currently training all the Theatre staff and Pathology Staff into doing exactly what is required to get this series of operations finished without a hitch and with a minimum of time and at top speed. :0

I'll not bother to tell what Skye has organised but you will not be disappointed I'm told. :^0

Col

by hal 9000

Is actually a Documentary and the NZ Government is so scared of this happening that they have issued a copy of this movie on DVD as well as portable DVD Players to every Man, Woman and Child in NZ so that they can all be on the look out for strange Sheep behaviour. It also explains the sudden influx of NZ Long Term Visitors who are applying for Citizenship here in AU. +This has been happening ever since that new Documentary was released and I was under the impression that NZ was now deserted except for the out of control sheep who where currently attempting to make a big raft to cross the water into AU to get even with their oppressors. :^0

I'm also very busy making electrified cars that send out a massive charge that cook anything with wool on it's back when it gets within 30 feet of a Kiwi's Car. One woman was severely burnt when she tried to carry her Poodle into her modified car but even still thinks that it was cheap insurance just to make sure that the defence device actually worked. Naturally the Poodle died instantly. :D

Col ]:)

[b][i]Kiwi Car Modifications by Appointment![/i][/b]

by w2ktechman

until Hal told me so!
And I still cannot remember anything like that (it does not sound like me either)...
So as far as I am concerned, you are a special person to me :x
everyone else just does not compare. But I seem to want the woman that just walked by :x
and her :x
and her :x

This discussion is closed to new replies.