Least favorite support request?

They could be perfectly right because if it is Windows(99.9% likelyhood),and as we all know ,just having Windows up too long can result in random crashes.

When I get a call like that ,I just say "It's Windows and reboot ".

I say the same exact thing, but sometimes it would be nice to know what was going on just prior to the incident.
The users act as though you are going to berate them, when on the other hand it is my job to find out what was going on, so that maybe I can find a solution to prevent that exact thing from re-occurring (so quickly at least).

The most frustrating thing is when a user thinks they are smarter than you and trying to prove to you how your advice or troubleshooting procedure is wrong (while having no idea what they are talking about). I just feel like screaming "if you are so smart why did you call me????" You wouldn't believe what I had users trying to prove to me: "the CD is supposed to be inserted shiny side up", "every CD is supposed to start automatically". I had users trying to use application CDs in regular DVD players, car CD players, you name it... GRRRR!

I'm glad we have a single bathroom in the office. Nobody can follow me into there.

I got this one about a year ago... "There are Demons in my Computer".

What does it do? "It's crazy" "It doesn't LIKE me!" "Why does it like you? It works when YOU are here!" "It must be my AURA!"

Argh! *Admin Slams Head On Desk* ~LoL~

These people are impossible. Infidel is blessed to not hear what they say!

In the past we've had alot of problems with people installing software on their own computers. We picked up a computer auditing package that runs over the network. One of the many cool things it does is email us everytime somebody installs something.

We spent a couple of weeks saying, "we noticed that you have SoftwareX installed on your computer. We'll going to have to come down and remove that."

After we got that resolved, we spent about a week calling people and saying, "we noctied that you installed SoftwareX on your computer 2 minutes and 57 seconds ago. We're going to have to come down and remove it."

Now THAT'S fun stuff, right there.

Since then (six months ago) unauthorized software installs have dropped to almost nothing.

Yep, I know that guy, and then he follows this particular crisis with, "Why does it...."

I just saw a repeat of one of the first episodes of Buffy, the Vampire Slayer.

In this episode, the snobby girls are using the computers in the library but don't know how to save their work.

The nerdy girl pipes in "Oh, just hit Deliver" and walks out.

One of the snobs looks up and down the keyboard for a moment, then hits the "DEL" key!

Inevitably, she must be one of those users who is always asking us to try to recover a document that they failed to save.

I work for a bunch of ungrateful buch.
I get a lot of calls that go something like this:

guy:This Sh$% wont take my password.
me: do you remember what your password is
guy: no
me: let me reset the password to whatever
guy: ok - click -

No "hello", or "please", or "thank you".
makes you feel used and dirty... lol

In all seriousness the corrosive properties of dishwasher detergent will likely cause electrolysis between the exposed leads of IC chips in the unit. After a few if not just one washing bridges will likely form and short out the chips.
On the other hand submerging in a deep vat of alcohol may be the trick your looking for though storing it may be difficult.

These are the most common complaints in my office. The most annoying thing is that most of the staff are fairly young and so should at least be comfortable with PCs.

Anyway, - my job didn't print. IS there paper in the printer. (Seriously)

My password isn't working - your num lock is off. Turn it on and try again.

I can't logon - it's got someone elses name in the user name box.

My e-mail isn't working - have you checked that you have e-mail. It isn't setup to automatically download.

I can't logon - a recent although thankfully temporary one this. We have just moved office and until ADSL is activated we have had to use a modem to collect the e-mails. I showed the user how to disconnect again, not thinking that she would disable the LAN connection instead of disconnecting the dialup connection. Maybe that one was my fault for not explaining properly.

There are many more, but these are the most common ones.

We get a lot of these, especially on Monday mornings. Obviously, the user is typing in the correct password. It's just that the Password Fairy locked their accounts out while they were gone!!

Well, I haven't had to deal with this issue for a while. But today someone ran a page through with wet ink on it. Oh, well.

This is too funny. Now could someone please compile all the jokes together in one place for a good laugh.

You're right that does sound weird. Are you telling me that an old surge protector moves electrons slower than a new one?

Sounds to me like you don't belong in a customer oriented career!

Step 1+) .....ok Mr. Smith what do you see the xxxx? No. What do you see? I'm not sure but I did everything you said. blah blah blah...Oh I also did this........ :0.....:( Ok please close the window and start again following only the steps I give you so that we'll be working together. Ok but I do I close the window....blah blah... Ok (hear we go again)

2. Now proceed to Step 1

btw did you get all your installs, configurations, troubleshooting, testing done?
Make sure you document it all......

3. End of day.

4. Got back to step 1

Can someone please help with this looping problem?

...But really I like my job and dealing with people.....usually.....when office politics aren't involved......oh I guess I better find one of those private rooms everyone's talking about....WAIT this whole converation I just had seems like more blah blah blah...

:)

And just think... you're in here whining about the powerful ones while making your measly wage, they're sitting up in their ivory tower probably laughing at you. Maybe you should do some more inner pondering. It always baffles me how the person on the bottom whines and complains about the person on the top when it should be quite clear that the one at the top must have made better decisions in their lives. So what he doesn't know what a power cord is. That's why you're there. He has more important things to think about. If you don't like the customer aspect of your job. Find a job where you don't have to interact with customers. When you become his equal then and only then can you complain about how little he knows about a power cord.

Well, you might say that isn't so bad BUT, I work 7:30 am to 6:00 pm...so I receive these calls at HOME...ON MY OWN TIME! Users will call me and say "do you have a minute" and I know that means that I will have to help them set up their dial up again because they "don't know what happened to it but it just went away" or they lost all of their email or a web page won't come up when they try to access it....

We finally got caller ID but that doesn't help because no one thinks to look at who is calling BEFORE they pick up the phone!

At work, I am very willing to help them, even for repeated requests because that is what I am here for but when I get home I am just "computered out!" But the people that I work with are really great and it is hard to say "no" so I guess I am either going to have to live with it or STOP ANSWERING MY HOME PHONE!

What does it matter whether they admit they don't know anything, or have enough knowledge to falsely lead them to believe they know more than they do. You were hired and accepted the position that you have, and I'm assuming that you knew that it meant dealing with end users/customers, or whatever. You're supposed to be the expert. You're supposed to have the people skills that someone complained about earlier to get the necessary information from the end user. If they don't want to give it or can't give you the information you need, you're supposed to have the technical know how to diagnose and troubleshoot the problem. There really is no excuse how ever you want to justify it. I like some of the more humorous stories as much as the next person, but some of these stories go way over the line.

Okay, well, uh, let's just flip it over and uh, well...you had muffins again???

1. I'm sure everyone has their share of 'gadget-kings/magazine technicians' in the office. You know the type - technically challenged but HAS to have the latest electronic organiser/PDA/phone,& they all want to synch them with their laptops.
2. People who insist on filing all their rubbish in 1GB+ Outlook personal folders & wonder why their PC chugs - it's an email client not a filing system.
3. Usually the same people have backup options available to them but of course never use em,& worse still expect the IT dept to magically KNOW when they screw up their software.
4. PRINTERS !! - nuff said

And you've had it twelve hours to muck it up. Or your kid was on it, and the first site s/he went to was www.sex.com.

I'm sorry, OS configs are only guaranteed 3 feet or 3 seconds, whichever comes first.

This is open shut. Undo everything you did to the PC (That you can). Especially take back your valuable CD burner. You can obviously put it to better you than she can.

I've had one user call me up to say that a PC won't start. It was reporting invalid boot disk. I asked her if there was a floppy disk in the drive.
"OH! I havn't checked that! Just a sec."
One minute later.... the now slightly flustered user picks up the phone and says "No there wasn't a disk in the drive."

Got down there to turn the PC on without a problem. Resolved the issue to be caused by the user's pride.

Another user told me she came downstairs and removed a floppy disk whilst cursing to herself.

Still I don't have an issue with getting paid a fair amount to drive somewhere to turn on a PC - not very testing though!

When the IT contact asks "How did those porn popups get installed on the Director's PC?"

Just what is the best way to tell them the director needs to stop looking at porn on his work PC?

That's hilarious. You can also take one of those white out pencils and write "any" on the enter key.

I would have to agree with you. There used to be a time when most companies prohibited eating or drinking near your workstation. On the other hand, if this company is that cheap or that hard pressed to save money, I would probably make sure my resume was up to date.

I'm pretty certain the idea was to do this with just water.

I love it when a user informs me "If you don't sort this machine out I'm going to throw it out the nearest window". When I tell them to do it or I tell them they are getting me confused with someone who cares, they are completely stumped

One of the more dreaded tasks is walking users through resetting network equipment or moving cabling on patch panels/switches at remote sites over the phone.
My favorite is always being on the phone with someone while having them reseat the network cable on a Winterm, PC, or what have you and all of the sudden, losing the phone call because they pulled the phone cord cable.
Hey, no one is perfect. :-)

Yep, I hear ya! Let me share my favorite "girl" story:

As a consultant for a small independent software and service firm, I was doing hardware upgrades to several PCs in a client's office because they just COULDN'T be without the machines overnight. (By the way, that's probably my least favorite "support" call: 'We need it done right away, and no, you can't take the machine to the shop ... we need it here, and the job has to be done in an hour ... '). Of course, there's no bench, no real place to work, and I'm in the middle of the busiest part of the office ... but that's nothing new, so I've got my tools and assorted parts spread out across the floor and a couple of nearby desks.

As I'm kneeling over an open PC with tools in one hand and a part in the other, one of the office workers comes up behind me and peers over my shoulder. She -- yes, I said SHE -- watches me for a few seconds then walks around and gazes at my tool kit. After a few more seconds studying the contents of the kit she looks at me and says ((I swear this is the truth!)), "Oh, my, do you really know how to USE all those things?!"

Hmmmm...is she serious?...do I dignify this with an answer?...can I mess with her head?...will she even know the difference?...

So I smiled my sweetest helpless-little-lady-type smile and said, "No, I just carry them around to impress people. And see...it worked!"

Alcohol will not touch a sugar deposit (like Coke or Pepsi). Sugar is only slightly soluable in alcohol. It takes water to really get rid of sugar.

At least once every 3 months I would get a call from one of the women in the Marketing department with the following demand: "I was on the phone with Mr. Doe when he clicked 'Send', but I haven't gotten the email yet. The file he's sending is really critical and I need it right now. Go out on the internet and get it for me!"

My response, every time, was, "I'm sorry, but it doesn't work that way. Make sure he sent it to the right address - if he did, it should get here soon."

In an email to me, which was actually RE: something entirely unrelated: "My email's not working"
My emailed response back: "What's wrong with it?"
Him: "It's not working"
Me: "What is happening that leads you to believe that it's not working?"
Him: "I didn't get any emails today"

That doesn't change the fact that you allow them to have access to you at home. The onus is still on you.

I can't narrow it down to one. That would be like telling a man dying of thirst to have just one glass of water. I'll list my top five peeves, however:

1. "My friend e-mailed me and I didn't get it."

My company allows users to send and receive personal e-mail, so long as it doesn't interfere with their work. Because we have such aggressive anti-spam filters a lot of the moronic jokes and scams sent by users ("Bill Gates will pay you $50 for forwarding this e-mail," "OMG!! If you have the file jdbgmgr.exe on your computer YOU HAVE A VIRUS! TELL EVERYONE!!!" and "Two guys dressed as nuns go into a brothel..." ) get deleted on sight, and that's just fine with me. Unfortunately, some users notice the failure of some of this garbage to arrive (normally after their friend sends them another e-mail breathlessly asking 'Did you get the last e-mail I sent?' - ever hear of the phrase "having a life?") and call me. A quick check of the logs, and I tell them to tell their friend to stop sending junk and our antispam filters will leave them alone! Better yet, they can get a Yahoo or Hotmail account and receive all the e-mail they want on it rather than cluttering up company systems and time.

2. "I tried to go to this site and the firewall blocked it!"

We use content filtering at the firewall level to keep people from goofing off on the web. You wouldn't believe the audacity of some of them, who get blocked from online gambling or shopping sites and then call me to ask why. "Because it's not a business related site!" I reply. "Oh."

3. "I can't print! Fix it now, now, NOW!"

We have a department at my organization staffed with users who all have personal printers. What happened was this: one person got a personal printer, their neighbor got jealous, and so that neighbor just had to have a personal printer. Then that person's neighbor saw it, got jealous, and you get the picture. The whole department has their own printer now, even though there is a perfectly good high-volume printer right near them that they can all print to as well. When one of their personal printers stops working, my God, it's Armageddon. I've actually been phoned by these users while I've been in the middle of serious support issues to come fix their printer, even though they can print just fine to the big Canon printer 20 feet away. When told "I'm in the middle of an emergency" they respond "Well, how long will it be?" God forbid they should get off their duffs and go walk over to the other printer.

4. "My computer is slow."

Many have also replied with this as their least-favorite support request. It's been my experience that if a user calls to register the above complaint chances are it is because they have ten million programs set to load on startup, including spyware and all the other garbage that can accumulate on a PC if a user browses the web and happily clicks "Yes" left and right to let any site install whatever it pleases. When we set up a system for someone it is completely optimized; we have a ghost image we deploy which is as fine-tuned as we can make it (all unnecessary services turned off, the Startup folder has nothing in it, etc.). The problem with a system being slow always seems to occur after we've set the machine up and the user opens Internet Explorer....

Upon checking out a slow computer invariably I'll find freeware screen saver programs, AOL instant messenger, some memory-hogging weather program (i.e. Weatherbug), news banners, etc. Not just spyware, which can crawl onto any PC uninvited, but crud that's been deliberately installed since the user just has to get the company PC they've been provided to do their job "set up just the way I like it."

True, it's not always the user's fault that this junk is present, but for the most part if a computer is slow it's because they've been doing stuff they shouldn't be doing with it. And it's very frustrating to be called and asked to devote part of my extremely busy day to cleaning up messes that people have caused rather than troubleshooting legitimate system problems like bad RAM, sluggish hard drive, etc. The first time, maybe no big deal. The second time, a little aggravating. The third time? You've got to be kidding me. The fourth time? Who the hell ever authorized you to use a PC?

I realize it's up to those of us in IT to educate the users so they can do their jobs using the systems we provide, but some of the people I support collect spyware on their machines again... and again... and again, despite all my instructions. To which I tell them: "If you don't want your system to be slow there's a very simple solution: don't install anything that isn't business-related, and stop browsing the web on company time. You don't pick up spyware by going to legitimate business sites."

5. "How do I "

Don't get me wrong; I'm glad to be seen as a resource for people who, for instance, want to know how to add bold text to their Word document. I just wish they would take the initiative to at least try to figure it out on their own rather than taking the lazy low road and calling me since that's easier than doing any actual work.

1. I believe this discussion started at a comical level as it's titled "Least favorite support request?". I don't think it was intended to berate the endusers, just some venting, laughing and stories.
2. have about 130 users mac/pc network that I administer. There are definatly days when there are certain people that will guaranteed annoy me with their repeated requests and inability to be happy with anything, technology and all. But there are also people that are wonderful to work with. I think it goes both ways. I work at a advertising/distributing company. A lot of time, if I get a user a new mouse or some other type of "perk", they will get me something free of charge out of the a vendors catalog.
3. I've heard from other employees complaints about a particular person in my IT dept that has the "high and mighty attitude". Nobody calls him unless absolutely neccessary.
Ok...I just wanted to answer the above comments with my own blah, blah, blah!

Much of management out there should also contemplate whether or not they know anything at all. In past help desk positions, I found myself being able to do the user's - including "management" job(s) for them faster and more accurately than they could. Why? because I actually took the time out to learn and remember (before teaching the user) what was required for that particular task - technical or not. I'm surprised you don't even suspect that this may be happening here in any of the other posts...

Being customer/ user oriented is one thing - servicing a room full of people deprived of common sense is insanity. Having users who unjustly believe that help desk is at their beck and call is also unreasonable, if not ridiculous.

I don't believe any of these other technicians are looking for users to worship them as techno-gods. I know I don't.

However, I do believe that I speak for everyone who posted on this thread that a little bit of common sense can go a long way. As the old clich? goes - look before you leap. Think about what you need to say to your technician before potential embarassment and generating needless frustration. From my experience, panic has never helped a bad situation get better.

Last but not least... in case you have not noticed, vltiii, this is a post about what support call(s) annoyed help desk individuals the most. How can you expect there to be no negative feedback?

if you have never had a user ask you this simple, but humble request you haven't lived the high life!

aloha from hawaii!

brian

Oh gee, you hurt my feelings.

You all read the stories about the CD player posing as a coffee cup holder... and I know some of you back in the 90's and early 2000's had this kinda call come in. Yes it did happen, and at one client in particular, who never used CD's, but all the new PC's came with CD players, this happened too often. Not only did I get calls about the "Cup Holder" being broken, but also about how to stop it from closing when you turn it on/off, and how to open it when the computer is off. This also lead to the spilling of coffee and water/juice in keyboards from prematurely closing. Nunff said. Aahhh I remember those days.

I used to work at as ISP. The general public really do have no idea, I now work for a software company, people still have questions but at least they know what the cup holder is for but some still have trouble with the foot pedal (mouse on floor - real story from ISP days supporting "senior-net" an off shoot from the local library for senior citizens) read BOFH for a good laugh http://bofh.ntk.net/Bastard.html

I can't think of anything more annoying than a user asking me to put a cartridge into a printer. Especially when the user is a engineer of sorts. I mean seriously now. Is a printer REALLY that mysterious and alien to other people? Is the 3 step procedure that difficult to understand?

1. Remove old cartridge from printer
2. Remove new cartridge from packaging
3. Insert new cartridge into printer

Nice spelling TW?T.

Well, that changes everything. If your company has a policy against viewing porn then I would say comply with the reporting requirements of that policy. If there is no policy in place there really isn't much that can be done except create one and make everyone aware of it.

My words exactly.....If I had the people skills to fix people instead of computers, I would be a psychologist.

You miight also check the power cord and be certain there are no kinks in the cord.

A few years back when as a consultant providing support to several trading floor operations we would always have a few traders who were ballbreakers where nothing was ever right. On slow days I would sometimes disconnect color connections which would not put them out of business but certainly give them a headache. In those days this was easily done because PC, vendor products, main components could sometimes be located two floors away in a Com room with of course monitors, keyboards, mouse all being at the desk. After the inevitable service request was made I would then proceed to the user to see what his problem was, which of course no longer existed. On days when I really wanted to be nasty I would simply disco the mouse plug it back in which on the then older machines required a reboot to sync up the mouse or keyboard. I would then respond to the very irate end user (traders always thought they were god's gift) of course fix them up and tell them they would have to reboot. Of course they never saved any work or trade information as they went along so there they were pissed off as hell,could'nt reboot for fear of losing important data or work their windows PC's via keyboard only of which they were clueless. One day told my fabulous boss of my way to reek revenge on surly traders, he laughed like hell, told me to be sure I billed an extra ten hours that week. Vengeance is Mine.

Without the uninformed customer DeskTop support types would be pushing burgers at MickyDees. Less attention to your own egos and more toward the task at hand and you might find your work actually rewarding.

Users who say their computer or some other computer that their work depends on is "down".

When asked to define "down", I ususally find that they can't log on, can't open one application, forgot their password, etc. Apparently, they think that anytime the smallest issue arises, the entire system is "down".

My little attempt(Very Little) at humor really got everyone fired up.
I have personally never treated an end user that way, but I have seen it happen.
I am the only person in the IT department at my company, and if I had such a poor attitude they would have replaced me long ago.
Personally I come from a background in the restraunt and retail industry, so I think that I have a pretty good grasp on the customer service aspect of tech support. I try and approach all of my support requests as customer interactions, since the users are my "customers". I have a good relationship with my end users, and intend on keeping it that way.

I can take the repeated calls about printers, slow computers, spyware crapping up their machines, VP's wanting to use their personal notebook at work (and still connect to their private ISP with no problems.:) ), etc....

But there's one thing that ranks above 'not having the ability to walk 6 feet to another printer'.

That is software purchased and installed by a USER to aid THEM in doing THEIR job (company approved, but they didn't tell me). Now, btw, it is business related.

Ex: I get a call from an engineer. HE has installed a program to help HIM work with HIS drawings (oh, this software is not a company app). HE calls me down because HE can't figure out how to get HIS software to do a certain function or print HIS work a certain way. So, while there's no fire to put out, I go to HIS desk. I stair at an application I've only heard of (yes we may the IT guy, geeks, machine techies, etc.... but we've haven't used every piece of software on the planet).
Well, I do something novel that's totally alien to the engineer. I OPEN THE HELP FILE! Sure enough in about 5-10 minutes I find where it tells you in detail how to do exactly what HE wants to do.
And this guy is building multi million dollar facilities.

What is so frustrating about this is that I'm a "one man" IT department. That does have its benifits such as working with everything from network infrastruture to proprietary database admin. It's a large enough network that I get exposed to just about anything, but, like I said, I'm one man. I've told users in memos, emails, and face-to-face to please consult the help file for software before calling me. But, I know the next time the phone rings it'll probably be another question on "how do I create another .pst file in Outlook". I have nightmares about that one. :)
You can only laugh about it. There's no use in pulling you hair out (if you have any left).

... I became a computer tech. I, like most people, got introduced to computers in the work environment, and like most people, had little or no training on the machine. It was plopped on my desk, and I was told to "use it". Other than a tech coming by and brusquely showing me how to login, I received no other information. I dreaded calling the IT department, because every question was treated with distain and I was made to feel stupid and a waste of time.

I became a tech support person specifically so that I COULD help people to understand and get to know their computers. None of my users are afraid to ask me a question, and none of my users take offense when I suggest that possibly they should learn more about their computers. I can't help everyone, I too have a few die hard users that simply refuse to understand anything techno, but the ones I do help sure outweigh them.

If you don't like tech SUPPORT, why do the job? Do everyone a favor, including your fellow techs, get into a different line of work.

Are for those things that can't be done. Sometimes people want you to "Just add in a feature to MS Word that will allow me to..."

we explain that we cannot re-write Word just for them, that they could perform the task by using something else. often they cannot be persuaded to use an alternative (and probably simpler ) method to produce the same result.

"So WHY can't I get a USB microwave for my pies?" We have to explain that USB sockets have been disabled for system security.

I am working for an ISP help desk support and much too often we get to deal with users who think that flipping monitor power switch is equivalent to restarting computer. Users who reply "... I have you" when asked what email application are they using... I think we should establish sort of "Computer User Licence" and make it a must for anyone who wants to use one....

My issue is when you get there to look at their problem and they are to busy to spend a few minutes to show you what they ment by their request "the application isn't working right"

You know the ones, they have a complaint then when you need to ask additional questions or ask to have them show you the problem they don't or won't be bothered with you. So then you are stuck and have no way to close the ticket as being resolved.

And I love him! He makes me look good, as I am on to server problems quick smart because of him. I don't know what else he does all day, but I know I can rely on him to be monitoring the servers while I get on with other work :-)

A user called once to say her PC just "stopped working and won't reboot". I arrived at her desk to start the usual troubleshooting when a co-worker in a neighboring cube stopped to say hello. Then he asked if the PC was going to be okay 'cause it took a pretty good hit. I asked "What do you mean?" He told me the user "was reaching around for something under her desk and knocked the PC over -- sounded pretty gruesome from where I was sitting." Sure enough, when I picked up the PC, I heard rattling inside... I made her wait the rest of the day before I got another PC imaged and on her desk.

We still laugh about the user who couldn't get her PC to work because we actually left the monitor ON after troubleshooting and shutting down her PC at the end of the day. So she came in the next morning and pushed the power button on the PC, then the monitor -- nothing on the screen. Then she pushed them both again to shut down and start over "three or four times" ... not realizing she was turning the monitor OFF and turning the PC ON, then turning the monitor ON and turning the PC OFF each time.

You can't make this stuff up!

The corperate world is like a TREE.... The people on top look down and see a bunch of smiling faces. :-) While the ones on the bottom look up and see a bunch of A**holes. Isn't life GRAND?!?!

My favorite is, "I got this error message so I rebooted." OK, so what is the error message? "I don't know. It was this grey box with a blue bar and a bunch of words." Umm... What did the words say? "I don't know, but you need to fix it right now!"

Move away from the keyboard and no one will get hurt.

well hows about that new OS m$ is making uhhhh...lunghorn?